I feel like I’m damaged

I’m in love with my man and my man is in love with me. But sometimes I have a hard time believing it. I’m 28 and I’ve been with men and women before. This is my first time feeling this way for someone and he said he felt the same way. I believe that because he’s 42 and aside from me he’s never been married before, only been in another relationship from when he was 19-24/25, and then had flings after. He’s been career focused his whole life and felt now was a great time to have a family and wife. He does everything right with me, we have our every now and again moments of arguments, but I really can’t complain. I have a history of abuse, family trauma, and having done sex work to help me through college (dancer and sugar baby) I’m going to therapy for my issues. With everything I’ve experienced/seen in this world, I just can’t believe he loves me and follows through. It’s to the point I get afraid, sometimes prone to self-sabotaging, and disassociate when we argue because I think he wants me to go. But he’s afraid I’m the one that will leave and he’s more afraid of that now since I’m 19 weeks. I wouldn’t because I want a two parent home and I am in love with him. How do I heal this part within me?

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dialectical behavior therapy

Therapy. Talk to your doctors. Pre partum depression is so real. For a few months I went crazy thinking my boyfriend would leave me and there wasn’t anything going on between us to make me feel like that. All the hormones and body changes just really made me insane. The best thing to do is try to block it out and start hyperfocusing on your baby!!!

It takes time, especially when you have had trauma in your past. Is therapy helping at all? Do you feel comfortable to talk about everything with your therapist? Do you go at least once a week? This makes a difference and sometimes it takes a while to find the right therapist for you. Give yourself grace and kindness. What I’ve learned from my trauma and motherhood is that becoming a mom focused my healing because I had to heal in order to be the mother I wanted to be. You can do this!

in our community

Nursery funding

My child turned 9 months last week. I applied for government funded hours nearly 2 months ago and so well within the required timeframe for the April term, however upon receiving my first invoice without the funding applied and having questioned this, I have now been informed that the stretched funding doesn’t start until 4th May.

Has anyone else been told it won’t start until May?

The government site states it should start from April 1st, and so I intentionally set my nursery start and return to work as the start of April for that reason, knowing that I wouldn’t be able to afford the nursery on my sole income without the funding

NHS job

Anyone work for the NHS and does 12 hour shifts? How do you work around childcare and your partners job?

Toddlers

How often are your toddlers asking for food? My oldest who is 3 just finished a whole plate of food and not even 10 minutes later he’s requesting more food. I know he’s going through a growth spurt, but how do you respond to this.

He has no respect for anything to do with me.

Husband and I decided to separate 3 days ago. I've been sleeping on the floor in the kids room, and we both have to stay in the same apartment for a while. He wont stop pushing little things and I am reaching my limit. Photos in comments

Is this normal?

Is it just my husband that does this? He is able to work from home via his computer and in the mornings and evenings he is on there doing his job. When he is done for the day he tends to stay in the room and either play video games or watch something. He will occasionally come out and play with the girls for a few minutes and that’s it but when I really need him he says he is busy. My daughters are both 1 year old now and I am just wondering how much involvement should he have with them now?
Idk if this is the norm or not…..

Identity crisis?

Am I the only sahm who feels like they have lost their identity??? I don’t make money for my family, when I used to make great money. But I refuse to drop my under a year old baby off with strangers.
My husband works so much. But I have no control over bringing in money and I’m a control freak type of person! I feel l like I’m losing my grip because we are kind of broke, but day care would only eat up my income anyways! So what’s the point. I’m a workaholic and now I’m just a twitching bum.
I wish I could work from home but so far that’s a fake dream. I’m almost 9 months pp, and I just need to know these awful mood swings and depression will end soon! Send wine!