MIL has a chest infection and wants to be around the baby

My mother in law lives in Bournemouth and comes up to see her family almost every week. She's not been here for a couple of weeks because she's been on holiday. Now, she texted me that she has a chest infection and wants to see the baby next weekend when I'm at my KIT day. I just know my partner will huff and puff and will say that it's unfair because she's not seen the baby in ages and I always go to my family. I don't want an argument with my partner but how do I tell her to kindly fuck off with your germs?

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Just tell her you already made plans for that weekend cause your mum has booked something (get her to book something lol) but that you would gladly let them see them the weekend after if that works for them. If they complain they haven’t seen them just say oh yea I know he misses you , he can’t wait to see you on .. date when your well. I hope you guys have so much fun.

Hell no. It’s not worth getting your baby sick. Tell her no and stand on it.

I literally wouldn’t care about his huffing and puffing

Yikes. Bronchitis is not something you want around a baby! She needs to get over herself and so will he lol. If she’s being treated, she can come around in a couple weeks. She won’t be symptomatic for long, so she’ll survive

Hell no! Only you can stand up for that baby and you will never forgive yourself if you give in and baby gets poorly x

Wait a week from now? I feel like she wont be sick anymore by then...?

I didn’t want any one with a cold or any kind of sniffling to be around my babies, and I was always vocal in a nice firm way to say anyone with the above should stay away until they are better /well.

Tell your MIL that you guys will be here when the bronchitis is over…and she shld take care of herself as she needs the rest to recover and she can be around as soon as she’s well. Tell her you know she will understand 😃. Start being uncompromisingly vocal and say what you want when it comes to the babies. That way she will think twice when she wasn’t a to come and see her grandchildren with a bug / germ 🙄. The LOs are relying on. Your partner just wants the easy way.

Absolutely not. I’d 100% be the bad guy in that situation. You’re not gonna give my baby whooping cough or something worse. 🤦🏾‍♀️

As a mother with her baby in hospital due to a virus, I would say absolutely not and your partner should advocate for your child and set that boundary with your MIL

Tell her yourself so there isn’t any “miscommunications” from your hubby part. Just say “sorry you are feeling bad! We have to wait until you are better so you can hang out with baby. You know, none of us want the baby to get sick too! I know you will understand :)”

Is she on antibiotics for her chest infection? It may have cleared by next weekend, so maybe just say to her about seeing how it goes?
Buttttt, if she is still poorly, definitely put your foot down & say no! My 9-month-old was in hospital last week with bronchiolitis, and they couldn't get his oxygen levels up - it was very scary and definitely not worth the risk x

Your message is quite polite, but you did the right thing. MIL herself should be saying that if her chest infection hasn’t cleared then she won’t come near your baby, I can’t believe some people would be so selfish. Your husband needs to reevaluate his priorities, baby’s protection and needs come before over seeing ill MIL.

Just a heads up, things dont "progress to RSV"... RSV is it's own virus. So if you caught something like the flu, it would just become RSV. Pneumonia maybe. Sounds like she was only going to come if she was feeling better, but absolutely worth it to keep the distance a bit longer if baby is that young just to be on the safe side. ❤

Sounds like your husband isn’t thinking clearly. It’s your baby, you know what’s best and if he can’t see that bc he was clearly raised wrong if he thinks his mothers ‘feelings’ trump your baby’s safety. They both sound like idiots ( I’m getting upset bc I can totally see my husband doing the same thing and when it comes to his parents/family he can’t see how unbelievably toxic they can be at times and refuses to do anything substantial about it). Just keep reminding yourself that your job is to protect your baby. She’s being unbelievably stupid and selfish to expect you to let her see the baby. Maybe don’t even kindly tell her to fuck off. Blatantly tell her that your baby is your priority and you don’t appreciate her putting you in this position to choose between your babies safety and your marriage.

Hey ladies, I have an update! Also thanks for encouraging me to speak up! My MIL called my partner, and she is still ill!!! Her voice is very husky and she does not sound well at all! I cannot imagine what I would do if she's given it to my little one again! But now she wants to she's saying she wants to see the baby next week lol 😂

We were in hospital for three days for RSV when my son was 2 months old… this was after someone had a cough from “allergies” at Christmas

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I've finally done it

I have finally done it. I have finally become the trope, the stereotype.

I have become bitter, resentful, and very overwhelmed and overloaded. I am very unhappy and hit burnout. And I snapped at my husband last night. I work full-time, and work has been very busy so im working late a lot. Im also in grad school. I also have a toddler that has become VERY clingy with me. My husband works shorter days but commutes, so he usually gets home after me by an hour or more. When he gets home, he usually heads to the restroom for at least 30 mins when he gets home. And now my toddler doesnt want anything to do with him. So im doing all the toddler duties until bed. I dont get 5 mins to myself. Not for almost 2 years. I finally hit my wall. I have also, somehow, become my MILs medical ride service and she somehow has an appt every week, it seems?! Shes not sick!! My husband was complaining that he needs to change routine to fit in a workout sometimes, and I lost it. I have been BEGGING for 5 mins to myself for months. I have been telling him how im not good, im going to burn out for months. And between his attitude and him complaining (which really got me b/c he blames me for not being able to work out?! Saying I need help when he gets home so he just cant workout now) I just lost it completely. I told him how unfair my life has become and I have the entire mental and emotional load and it is just not fair. He got mad at me and said "hes trying" when hes literally not trying at all. What do I do?? No one is taking the load from me! And im done and dont know what to do now.
I do not like this version of me.

AITA?

This isn't a major issue, just wondering if I'm being a bit of an asshole.

• I do shift work, 5 out of 7 days, full-time.
• My partner works from home (mostly, sometimes he goes into the office) M-F, full-time.

Anyway, whenever I have a day off during the week he gets in his feelings when I make myself food (breakfast and lunch) but not him. His reason is he's working, I'm not - Which is fair but I've asked him how many times on a weekend has he gotten up, on his day off and made me breakfast and a lunch to take with me to work? You guessed it, 0.

So basically, just because I'm at home I don't think the responsibility to feed him should automatically fall on me when he manages to feed himself just fine while I'm at work.

Is this clever or cruel?

My husband and i were talking and with social media and the internet in general being a terrifying dumpster fire, we are trying to figure out the best way to keep our son safe while still teaching him how to safely be online and moderation.

We landed on the idea of giving him the 90's kid treatment. A computer in the living room for us to keep an eye on what hes doing online, and once we feel hes mature enough to hang with friends without adult supervision he gets a flip phone. When we feel he is responsible enough and he earns and saves up the money for the physical phone, case, and screen cover, then we will be happy to take him to get a smart phone.

I thought this was air tight, but now my brother says its cruel to give a kid a flip phone, and besides he can just use his friends phones at school.

My husband and i remember a time before the internet, and we remember having complete access to something no one understood yet. We saw unspeakable things and are always battling with the urge to put the phone and social media down. I dont want that for my son, especially with his brain so vulnerable still.

If your partners parent passes away

And you and that parent didn't get along are you still go to the funeral?

Not my situation!

Big vent!

Hi mums.
I'm a first time mum in my 40s to twin boys.They are almost 5 months old and the biggest miracle in my life!
I am struggling!!!
I'm pretty sure I have ppa as my pregnancy was a very high risk and all I remember was crying from anxiety of all the ifs!Thankfully even born at 35 weeks and skinny,didn't need iu time.
My husband is not helping much because he's always too busy with work.He will "look" after them usually between 8pm-12am so I can have a chance to sleep.
He expects me to just sleep when I touch the pillow,even though I hear tje babies crying and him don't really bother because most of the times he'll be on his laptop working.
When I tell him I can't relax to fall asleep because I feel you r neglecting the babies,he says I'm the problem becauae I'm always there with them and don't give them alone time!!
I am angry!!I am furious!!
I can't keep.up.with housework becauae someone alwaya neess me and most of the times they nap I either cook and clean tje kitchen,do laundry or try and take a quick nap.
He doesn't help.around the house,becauae..guess what?always super busy.
I asked him nicely we could clean the house together every Saturday morning so it's easier and quicker for both of us and he said no,because he has a lot of work but probably wants to sleep until 12 or 2.
2 days ago a button of his coat ripped and I told him I'll sew it these days.
Earlier this morning while running late for his work,as always,he weara the coat and told him didn't get the chance to fix the button and sarcastically said..of.course u didn't!!!
I spent all night awake because one of the babies had congested nose and we've been trying to reduce one fees at night.
I wanted to punch him!!He left and I started crying...I cry so much,even at 5 months pp...
I can't go on like this anymoreeeee...
The crying in my ears is constant..my head is always numb..I've gained so much weight and can't find the strength to get back on track..
Even if I try to.find a therapist to just talk,is it gonna help?I really don't know😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Partner no longer wants baby #2

Before our son was born we originally both wanted minimum 2 kids but we were hoping for 3-4. My partner found the birth traumatic to watch and also struggled a lot with the newborn/baby stage. He no longer wants to have any more children and it’s completely breaking my heart. I need another baby. We’ve spoken about it a lot and the options. He said he wasn’t COMPLETELY closed off to it so I asked him to try and work through his feelings and reconsider his decision. He eventually said he definitely doesn’t want another. I know that I will always want one and my feelings will never change. Do we have to break up or does anyone know anything else I can do to help change his mind? Has anyone else’s partner said this and then changed their mind? I don’t want to break up because I adore him and our life together and I’d hate to split up our family for “selfish” reasons and make my son miss out on having both of us together but I just don’t know what to do