Am I crazy that I don’t think I should have to ask my partner for help with our son?

I am a full time mom and my fiancé is currently out of work for medical purposes. All three of us have been sick with the flu this week and I have had to rally through it to take care of our son for the past 4 days. This morning my fiancé said he would take our son so I can sleep so when we all woke up from a nap and he rolled over to continue sleeping, I got annoyed and frustrated and he got mad that I didn’t ask him for help. He’s his father and he offered to help so I don’t feel like I should’ve had to ask him to help. Am I being crazy for being so peeved?

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Short answer NO. And so sorry y’all are getting hit too. My family is recovering and it was rough for sure. I’m thankful that my husband helped but I did have to ask and a few days later when he felt better and I didn’t, I had to explain how hard it was for me to balance everything with him back to work.

For some reason they just need it communicated to them and I take a deep breath and continue to remind myself that asking the same things over and over really isn’t that hard 😵‍💫

thank you. I have a very hard time asking for help in the first place. I just feel like I have to ask him to be his dad and I don’t want to have to ask him for that

My opinion no because he shouldn’t have offered to help and not help. That would annoy and frustrate anybody that’s looking for that extra help that was offered and not asked of you shouldn’t feel crazy or think your crazy at all

No your not wrong 😑 I would be the same way! lol I had to ask my fiancé to be more present and help more, because he was the same way he was like I didn’t know you needed help 🙈 and I was like no problem I’ll tell u if I need it and that’s what I had to do now he knows to help because I told him last year I could use the help, and although it’s annoying to ask for his help because I wish he would do it on his own but I’m over it now 🤷🏾‍♀️ took him 6 months to create that habit of helping but now it’s easier and I just check in with him every couple month and tell him the areas I could use assistance and he provides the assistance it’s been a game changer for us to just communicate about it and check in with him hope this helps!

Thank you ladies. I appreciate your support and comments

I don't think you're crazy at all. It's not "helping you," it's being a parent. You both have a common goal to raise baby. He needs to do his part too. You did your turn while you guys were sick, you've more than earned a morning to recover.

in our community

Is this clever or cruel?

My husband and i were talking and with social media and the internet in general being a terrifying dumpster fire, we are trying to figure out the best way to keep our son safe while still teaching him how to safely be online and moderation.

We landed on the idea of giving him the 90's kid treatment. A computer in the living room for us to keep an eye on what hes doing online, and once we feel hes mature enough to hang with friends without adult supervision he gets a flip phone. When we feel he is responsible enough and he earns and saves up the money for the physical phone, case, and screen cover, then we will be happy to take him to get a smart phone.

I thought this was air tight, but now my brother says its cruel to give a kid a flip phone, and besides he can just use his friends phones at school.

My husband and i remember a time before the internet, and we remember having complete access to something no one understood yet. We saw unspeakable things and are always battling with the urge to put the phone and social media down. I dont want that for my son, especially with his brain so vulnerable still.

If your partners parent passes away

And you and that parent didn't get along are you still go to the funeral?

Not my situation!

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Before our son was born we originally both wanted minimum 2 kids but we were hoping for 3-4. My partner found the birth traumatic to watch and also struggled a lot with the newborn/baby stage. He no longer wants to have any more children and it’s completely breaking my heart. I need another baby. We’ve spoken about it a lot and the options. He said he wasn’t COMPLETELY closed off to it so I asked him to try and work through his feelings and reconsider his decision. He eventually said he definitely doesn’t want another. I know that I will always want one and my feelings will never change. Do we have to break up or does anyone know anything else I can do to help change his mind? Has anyone else’s partner said this and then changed their mind? I don’t want to break up because I adore him and our life together and I’d hate to split up our family for “selfish” reasons and make my son miss out on having both of us together but I just don’t know what to do

Nursery funding

My child turned 9 months last week. I applied for government funded hours nearly 2 months ago and so well within the required timeframe for the April term, however upon receiving my first invoice without the funding applied and having questioned this, I have now been informed that the stretched funding doesn’t start until 4th May.

Has anyone else been told it won’t start until May?

The government site states it should start from April 1st, and so I intentionally set my nursery start and return to work as the start of April for that reason, knowing that I wouldn’t be able to afford the nursery on my sole income without the funding

Jealous of my husband

I’m so jealous of him and it’s making me resentful. We have a ten week old and I’m jealous that he is at work all day. I’m jealous he can leave for lunch and actually eat an uninterrupted lunch. Take a phone call uninterrupted. Chat with a friend he runs in to uninterrupted. Even go to the bathroom when he wants uninterrupted. He comes home from work when he wants. He’s not on a set schedule. Some days are late some are early. It depends on when he’s done. I’m jealous he can come home at 10pm and shower, eat and go right to bed uninterrupted because I already have the baby asleep. He doesn’t have to worry about anything house wise or baby wise because I’ve done it all. Meanwhile I’m covered in puke and crap and smell like rotten milk. When he is home he is VERY active and helpful. So it’s not that. I’m just jealous his world hasn’t changed and mine has I guess. This isn’t something he’s doing wrong so I’m not sure how to get past this. I wish I could keep him home all day because that’s how helpful he is, but I understand he obv needs to work.

Calpol

My mum has just given my 4 year old calpol because he asked for it. He isn’t poorly (although was last week, been fine this week) he just likes the taste of it. My mum didn’t check, didn’t ask, just gave it to him and when I’ve questioned her she said “he asked for it”. Then quizzed 4 year old who said he asked for it because it tastes nice.

How would you react?