So confused about how to improve sleep

My LO is exactly the same, she is 17 weeks. So true about sleep consultants teasing with a bit of advice. Instagram is full of it. I am also not sure how I feel about sleep training however I do think there is some “science” behind consistent routine / schedule and I feel ok to structure her day and this has helped a little (I mean a little 🤪). So wake up at 0700 (consistently, I know it seems counter productive) and then 2 hour wake windows between each nap watching for sleepy cues in case it’s before or after depending on how long LO sleeps too, mine does 30-45 min max but lunch time nap should ideally be 1.5 hrs (so nap usually around 9, 1, 4:30) then bed around 06:30-07:00 with consistent bedtime routine. Been doing this for about 2 weeks now and she will now self settle occasionally esp before midnight. Just a suggestion - might not work for your LO or you.

I feel the same about sleep advice. I've read 'everything' about sleep and tried so many things. My only suggestion is to try every option you want to, at least once when you are up for it.
Nothing seems to work for me, just the odd occasion.
My current issue is not being able to transfer her without her waking up.

My baba is similar, EBF and waking regularly at night. We also try shifts to help, and our baby accepts expressed milk in a bottle which means I can sleep a decent chunk at the weekends. Is this something you could try? We sometimes find a big bottle can keep baba asleep for a bit longer, as well…

I don’t think there’s any scientific evidence behind sleep training at this age, I’m afraid 😟 but it won’t be forever, I’m sure it will start improving for you 🤞💖

One other thing you could try is a formula feed at night (although again I’m not sure there’s actually scientific evidence to back it up, I’ve only got anecdotal evidence from friends). I totally get it if you’re reluctant, when you’ve got this far with EBF. I’m desperate not to do this because my baby already has reflux/tummy issues, so I really understand if this isn’t an option for you. But when everyone’s mental health is at stake, I just want to throw it out there and say it’s ok to try it!

Also agree with about day time naps - consistent routine is good sleep hygiene and I’m sure I’ve seen an improvement after making sure I try to get baba to sleep every 1.5-2 hours, even if I can only get her napping for 15-20 mins!

It sounds like she’s ‘snacking’ so just having small amounts of milk at a time instead of having one big feed which will keep her full for a good few hours. It’s hard for you to monitor if you are breastfeeding though 😖 I formula feed my twins (4 months old) and they have around 7 ounces before bed and go about 10-12 hours a night. One of my friends breastfeeds and she has a similar situation to you. It’s a lot easier if you are expressing and feeding with a bottle as you can see what she’s having. Due to having a toddler and twins it’s impossible for us to rock them all to sleep so we do feed them and then put them into the cot awake. The first few nights they did scream for about 5 minutes before falling asleep which was really hard to listen to but now they literally just go to sleep. I’m so sorry for what you are going through. Sleep deprivation is the absolute worst xxx

I don’t breastfeed but I am going through a tough time with my baby waking up lots through the night. He’s going through the sleep regression, and I feel like from advice you get, if you don’t try to help them sleep independently now then you won’t get through the regression! It’s making me panic as I don’t like to leave my baby for too long if he is fussing and it seems he is really unable to self settle - so how do you teach a baby to self settle 🤷‍♀️ seems impossible and you’re right, experts don’t want to give you full advice unless you’re paying them - it’s pretty disgusting.

Also my son had a terrible day napping - I think he had just over 2 hours and then that is the only time he slept through the night for weeks! So confused.

Would love to hear from people who are past the sleep regression and what they did to get through it 💞 xx

try following @calmandbrightsleepsupport on Instagram - they are brilliant x

@charlotte I panic just like you. I then had a look at groups with babies a bit older than ours and they seem to go through the same stuff still.
Unless I read a good few posts from people saying how they've managed to change sleep then I remained convinced that unless you have the exception to the rule (a good sleeper) there's not a lot you can you but worth trying things out.

@Jodi hi! Been awake since 2.30am so not sure I can see straight. I've had a look at their page but can't see any actual info just reels asking you to dm them. Did you request their stuff or paid for their plans?

they were guests on giovanna fletchers postcast ‘happy mum happy baby’. They talk about it a lot on there but I think they are helping people for free🥰 maybe listen to the episode and see if that helps, it talks a lot about soothing xx

ooh! I'm on it, thank you so much. I'm leaving no stone unturned in my mission to sleep 🤣

My LO has been doing the same for the past 3 weeks, he’s EBF too, I think it must be the 4 month sleep regression, my plan was to just ride it out. The only think that has helped so far is safely cosleeping from 3am so I can breastfeed sidelying instead of having to properly wake up and transfer him back to his cot. I figured this was safer than me falling asleep with him accidentally. I don’t know if this would be something you’d feel comfortable doing until it passes? Cosleepy on Instagram has lots of safe cosleeping advice.
I hope things improve soon!

Same here and it is the 4 month regression! I thought my daughters was bad but my son is worst, on week 5 now of hourly wake ups and I’m so dead!

I did the cry it out, Ferber method and cosleeping with my daughter and….. they work for a little and then reset if they are ill or you go on holiday. Cosleeping won in the end because we all got to sleep. At some point in their lives they will stop sleeping with you so I am enjoying the most of it now. This has made me less pressure of sleep situation with my 4 month old, his regression is bad so we are cosleeping otherwise I won’t get any sleep