Nurserys

My boy is 6 months next week. When is the best time to start getting his name down for nursery’s? First time mum so I’m absolutely clueless when to do it or even how to go about it so any advice is appreciated 🥰

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I know mums who are having to put names down while they are still pregnant it’s so booked up. I would check your local ones and find one you like and her name down asap.

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I’ve heard of others doing that but see when I was pregnant that thought didn’t even cross my mind 😅 there’s 2 close to me that would be very handy so I’ll give them a call and take it from there but thank you lol

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I would say as soon as possible!! I had to get my spot when I was pregnant for the one in my village, I know lots of people who have struggled to get a spot who waited until they were born. So I’d say don’t leave it any longer if you have a particular one in mind c

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I think it all depends on what your local area is like and how busy the nurseries are! I don't think it would do any harm to start looking now and getting a feel for them. I didnt start looking until my LB was 8 months, ready for him to start at 1 years, most had plenty of space. But now the free hours are starting from 9 months my nursery is booked up

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yeah I’ve 2 particular in mind that are quite close to me so I’ll phone them soon as possible to see how I go about it x

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We see mums at our nursery looking round when pregnant and putting their deposits down, definitely make some visits and calls around your area x

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I’m not even sure how busy they are in my area that’s the thing. Ahh ok I’ll definitely get the ball rolling now then for him

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I’ve had mine down since I was 20 weeks pregnant as nurseries are very busy with all the free hours being announced and many closing.

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I put our baby’s name down when I was 20 odd weeks pregnant due to the limited spaces and funding x

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Due to the 15 hour funding grom September for 9m+, there'll be a waiting list most likely so look into it asap

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Before birth or straight after in most places in the uk so asap.

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As soon as you can, waiting lists are ridiculous and the government offering free childcare without paying the nursery's enough hasn't helped as now some are struggling and having to close so there's more kids and less spaces.

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I’d say soon as you can, the nursery for my LO has a 14 month waiting list, I put his down when 20 weeks pregnant xx

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I registered for a few whilst I was pregnant some had waiting lists of 2yrs!! It's worse now with funded hours.

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Definitely as soon as you can! I work in a nursery (0-5years) and we’ve had mummas coming to us pregnant looking for space next year already because everywhere in the area has waiting lists that are super long!
It’ll be worse too if you’re in England because of the funding for 9month olds coming into action soon everywhere will have long waiting lists(heard of some having 1-2 year long lists)!

So definitely do it sooner rather than later

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It all depends on the area you live and the nursery you want, I'd definitely start looking now though. I had to put my name down with my daughter when I was only 12 weeks pregnant

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I've finally done it

I have finally done it. I have finally become the trope, the stereotype.

I have become bitter, resentful, and very overwhelmed and overloaded. I am very unhappy and hit burnout. And I snapped at my husband last night. I work full-time, and work has been very busy so im working late a lot. Im also in grad school. I also have a toddler that has become VERY clingy with me. My husband works shorter days but commutes, so he usually gets home after me by an hour or more. When he gets home, he usually heads to the restroom for at least 30 mins when he gets home. And now my toddler doesnt want anything to do with him. So im doing all the toddler duties until bed. I dont get 5 mins to myself. Not for almost 2 years. I finally hit my wall. I have also, somehow, become my MILs medical ride service and she somehow has an appt every week, it seems?! Shes not sick!! My husband was complaining that he needs to change routine to fit in a workout sometimes, and I lost it. I have been BEGGING for 5 mins to myself for months. I have been telling him how im not good, im going to burn out for months. And between his attitude and him complaining (which really got me b/c he blames me for not being able to work out?! Saying I need help when he gets home so he just cant workout now) I just lost it completely. I told him how unfair my life has become and I have the entire mental and emotional load and it is just not fair. He got mad at me and said "hes trying" when hes literally not trying at all. What do I do?? No one is taking the load from me! And im done and dont know what to do now.
I do not like this version of me.

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AITA?

This isn't a major issue, just wondering if I'm being a bit of an asshole.

• I do shift work, 5 out of 7 days, full-time.
• My partner works from home (mostly, sometimes he goes into the office) M-F, full-time.

Anyway, whenever I have a day off during the week he gets in his feelings when I make myself food (breakfast and lunch) but not him. His reason is he's working, I'm not - Which is fair but I've asked him how many times on a weekend has he gotten up, on his day off and made me breakfast and a lunch to take with me to work? You guessed it, 0.

So basically, just because I'm at home I don't think the responsibility to feed him should automatically fall on me when he manages to feed himself just fine while I'm at work.

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Big vent!

Hi mums.
I'm a first time mum in my 40s to twin boys.They are almost 5 months old and the biggest miracle in my life!
I am struggling!!!
I'm pretty sure I have ppa as my pregnancy was a very high risk and all I remember was crying from anxiety of all the ifs!Thankfully even born at 35 weeks and skinny,didn't need iu time.
My husband is not helping much because he's always too busy with work.He will "look" after them usually between 8pm-12am so I can have a chance to sleep.
He expects me to just sleep when I touch the pillow,even though I hear tje babies crying and him don't really bother because most of the times he'll be on his laptop working.
When I tell him I can't relax to fall asleep because I feel you r neglecting the babies,he says I'm the problem becauae I'm always there with them and don't give them alone time!!
I am angry!!I am furious!!
I can't keep.up.with housework becauae someone alwaya neess me and most of the times they nap I either cook and clean tje kitchen,do laundry or try and take a quick nap.
He doesn't help.around the house,becauae..guess what?always super busy.
I asked him nicely we could clean the house together every Saturday morning so it's easier and quicker for both of us and he said no,because he has a lot of work but probably wants to sleep until 12 or 2.
2 days ago a button of his coat ripped and I told him I'll sew it these days.
Earlier this morning while running late for his work,as always,he weara the coat and told him didn't get the chance to fix the button and sarcastically said..of.course u didn't!!!
I spent all night awake because one of the babies had congested nose and we've been trying to reduce one fees at night.
I wanted to punch him!!He left and I started crying...I cry so much,even at 5 months pp...
I can't go on like this anymoreeeee...
The crying in my ears is constant..my head is always numb..I've gained so much weight and can't find the strength to get back on track..
Even if I try to.find a therapist to just talk,is it gonna help?I really don't know😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

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8

If your partners parent passes away

And you and that parent didn't get along are you still go to the funeral?

Not my situation!

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15

Avoidant husband

I love my husband and he is a good man. We have some issues in our relationship however, as he has an avoidant attachment style (finds romance/intimacy/being emotional difficult). This comes from him having to be independent from a young age and having quite an abusive mother.
The issues in our relationship are mainly around a lack of sex and intimacy. I think the problem is that to feel turned on, I need to feel connected and wanted. My husband (being avoidant) will usually make jokes about being horny whereas I would want to have someone make me feel beautiful/sexy to get in the mood.
It sounds terrible but I've sometimes had dreams about exes that would make me feel this way, and the romance we had (eye contact, intensity, deep words). It makes me feel really guilty but I feel like i'm starved of that. My husband would like a lot more sex but I can't always force myself if I'm not feeling it.
We've spoken a bit about therapy but I know its often really expensive so we probably wouldn't be able to afford it. Do you have any suggestions please? I know that neither of us are wrong in what we want, just different but I'm scared about whether we can fix it or if we're doomed?

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12

Is this clever or cruel?

My husband and i were talking and with social media and the internet in general being a terrifying dumpster fire, we are trying to figure out the best way to keep our son safe while still teaching him how to safely be online and moderation.

We landed on the idea of giving him the 90's kid treatment. A computer in the living room for us to keep an eye on what hes doing online, and once we feel hes mature enough to hang with friends without adult supervision he gets a flip phone. When we feel he is responsible enough and he earns and saves up the money for the physical phone, case, and screen cover, then we will be happy to take him to get a smart phone.

I thought this was air tight, but now my brother says its cruel to give a kid a flip phone, and besides he can just use his friends phones at school.

My husband and i remember a time before the internet, and we remember having complete access to something no one understood yet. We saw unspeakable things and are always battling with the urge to put the phone and social media down. I dont want that for my son, especially with his brain so vulnerable still.

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