Mortified looking at my bank statements

My partner had his bank closed down because an energy bill tried to come out of his account being 3k plus and because he didn’t have it or an overdraft they closed his account so he has been using my bank.

I just had a look through my bank statements and I’ve seen without my permission he has managed to spend £320 on weed, £420 on tik tok and £215 on takeaways IN THE PAST 19 DAYS. We have no food or money today and I was really confused as to why and now I know what is going on. All of these payments have absolutely nothing to do with me I haven’t anything other than what I have cooked. We have no food shopping because of this. I have a young baby under a year old. I am shocked I am so hurt by this. I have been trying to leave him for months but it’s taking a very long time to be housed and my family live very far. Just to be clear he doesn’t work he plays games on his pc, he doesn’t wake up till 12/1 every day and he doesn’t help at all around the house or with our child. If I try and discuss all these issues I get so much abuse thrown at me and he will just walk away.

I feel so broken 🥲

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Omg get him off your account now! With spending like that I'd doubt his story about the 3k Bill as well, I gave never heard of a bank closing your account when you owe them money

He will tank your credit score and the bank won'tgive you any grace because he has permission, please put a stop to it. It's financial abuse & you don't deserve it

Adding to this - if you think he could turn nasty maybe claim it's the bank that have blocked him due to suspected fraud or something? If that will buy you some time

As soon as you’re able to leave him! Sounds like a nightmare and the cheek of him taking your money!

I’m so confused at the fact that they closed his account? I’ve never heard of that. I’ve owed money and it’s bounced back. Doesn’t close the account.

Get him off your account and see if your local council has any grants you can apply for, also look at food banks.

God so many men are useless like this! The computer games and not waking up till 1 are enough reason to leave as soon as you can.

Also how’s he spent £400 on TikTok? Like on the shop?

I’ve never heard of it either but I saw a letter from the bank saying his account was to be closed down effective immediately it didn’t mention any other reason except the overdue balance which did bounce eventually

gifting his friends coins on tik tok to be on the gaming ranking

he’s not on my account he just gets my phone from under my pillow when I’m asleep and logs in. I changed my password and he woke me up at 3am asking why he couldn’t use the bank. He will kick off if he can’t get access to any money he says I’m abusing him

Omg no that's unacceptable, thats theft! Does he work? Is it his money in any way? Still doesn't give him the right to demand access to your account to blow it on useless stuff and leave you with no money for food!

Going down your phone to get access to your bank. His abusing you, mentally and financially. Please speak to your GP, local children centre or woman's aid for advice. None of what his doing is ok or justified or you being unfair

in our community

If yall still giving your kids processed food, pls seek help

I understand not everybody can afford healthy ingredients all the time, but I’m seeing so many moms on social media giving they kids artificial cereals, coffee, frozen pancakes, velveetta Mac and cheese, hot Cheetos, kraft, the list goes on. I’m sorry but are yall not capable of cooking from scratch or ?? On top of that, if you still using canola and vegetable oil in 2026 you gotta stop. Am I the only one that notices this ???

AITA?

This isn't a major issue, just wondering if I'm being a bit of an asshole.

• I do shift work, 5 out of 7 days, full-time.
• My partner works from home (mostly, sometimes he goes into the office) M-F, full-time.

Anyway, whenever I have a day off during the week he gets in his feelings when I make myself food (breakfast and lunch) but not him. His reason is he's working, I'm not - Which is fair but I've asked him how many times on a weekend has he gotten up, on his day off and made me breakfast and a lunch to take with me to work? You guessed it, 0.

So basically, just because I'm at home I don't think the responsibility to feed him should automatically fall on me when he manages to feed himself just fine while I'm at work.

Blw

Hi I am running out off ideas on what to make for Lil 14 month old for breakfast lunch and dinner if anyone have any resipes would be great to try my boy with them

Should I respect his wishes??

I’ve been a SAHM for 4 years now and my husband does a great job providing for our family and we never need for anything. With that i still had to sacrifice some wants like shopping when I want getting my hair and nails done regularly so when I can I try to supplement for my wants and savings by selling my craft items at vendor markets and recently I’ve started donating plasma. Which has been consistent income for me. $125 twice a week. Well my husband has expressed that he doesn’t like me donating plasma. He feels like it’s not worth it to put my body through those conditions for $125. He even went out to sell one of his guns today and gave me all the money and told me “I shouldn’t have to donate plasma no more”. That was so sweet but I disagree. I planned on continuing to donate plasma to save for my kids birthdays thats coming up, a trip we have planned and our anniversary. I don’t know what to do. I finally found something that pays something consistently and my husband is against it. What should I do?

Avoidant husband

I love my husband and he is a good man. We have some issues in our relationship however, as he has an avoidant attachment style (finds romance/intimacy/being emotional difficult). This comes from him having to be independent from a young age and having quite an abusive mother.
The issues in our relationship are mainly around a lack of sex and intimacy. I think the problem is that to feel turned on, I need to feel connected and wanted. My husband (being avoidant) will usually make jokes about being horny whereas I would want to have someone make me feel beautiful/sexy to get in the mood.
It sounds terrible but I've sometimes had dreams about exes that would make me feel this way, and the romance we had (eye contact, intensity, deep words). It makes me feel really guilty but I feel like i'm starved of that. My husband would like a lot more sex but I can't always force myself if I'm not feeling it.
We've spoken a bit about therapy but I know its often really expensive so we probably wouldn't be able to afford it. Do you have any suggestions please? I know that neither of us are wrong in what we want, just different but I'm scared about whether we can fix it or if we're doomed?

Big vent!

Hi mums.
I'm a first time mum in my 40s to twin boys.They are almost 5 months old and the biggest miracle in my life!
I am struggling!!!
I'm pretty sure I have ppa as my pregnancy was a very high risk and all I remember was crying from anxiety of all the ifs!Thankfully even born at 35 weeks and skinny,didn't need iu time.
My husband is not helping much because he's always too busy with work.He will "look" after them usually between 8pm-12am so I can have a chance to sleep.
He expects me to just sleep when I touch the pillow,even though I hear tje babies crying and him don't really bother because most of the times he'll be on his laptop working.
When I tell him I can't relax to fall asleep because I feel you r neglecting the babies,he says I'm the problem becauae I'm always there with them and don't give them alone time!!
I am angry!!I am furious!!
I can't keep.up.with housework becauae someone alwaya neess me and most of the times they nap I either cook and clean tje kitchen,do laundry or try and take a quick nap.
He doesn't help.around the house,becauae..guess what?always super busy.
I asked him nicely we could clean the house together every Saturday morning so it's easier and quicker for both of us and he said no,because he has a lot of work but probably wants to sleep until 12 or 2.
2 days ago a button of his coat ripped and I told him I'll sew it these days.
Earlier this morning while running late for his work,as always,he weara the coat and told him didn't get the chance to fix the button and sarcastically said..of.course u didn't!!!
I spent all night awake because one of the babies had congested nose and we've been trying to reduce one fees at night.
I wanted to punch him!!He left and I started crying...I cry so much,even at 5 months pp...
I can't go on like this anymoreeeee...
The crying in my ears is constant..my head is always numb..I've gained so much weight and can't find the strength to get back on track..
Even if I try to.find a therapist to just talk,is it gonna help?I really don't know😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭