Am I about to blow up my marriage?

My marriage is not in a good place right now. We argue more than we get along and just generally we don’t seem to be on the same page most of the time. This has been since midway through my pregnancy. We’ve had to pause marriage counseling due to financial strain and that’s just made things even harder. Our son is almost 2 and we rely on my mom and a neighbor for childcare while we search for a daycare. We think we’ve found one but our son cannot start until he turns 2 in a few weeks. My mom lives out of state and leaves us Saturday to go manage some things back home. Our neighbor is away until at least after Labor Day but possibly longer and I cannot take the time off to care for our son. My husband just took off a few unpaid weeks off to care for him because our neighbor and my mom weren’t available. So my idea is I can either let my mom take our son with her or I can go with them and work remotely until my son can start daycare on Sept 16th. My husband is completely against the idea and feels like I should either take time off or work from home with my son. I tested the WFH with my son Monday and Tuesday while my mom was out. When I have no meetings it’s fine but when I do it’s a disaster and I can’t structure my schedule to only have them during his nap or before he wakes up. My husband’s main issues with both plans are because of some arguments he’s had with my family recently and his feeling that he’s made most of the sacrifices with respect to caring for our son. There is some validity to that but he won’t acknowledge the reason behind that which is I am the breadwinner. I have to stay secure in my job for the wellbeing of our family and taking time off right now is not a good idea as it’s a critical time for my team. So I’m thinking of just going with my mom and my son anyway. I figure of the two options this one at least alleviates his concerns around our son being without either of us (he’s never stayed overnight somewhere without one of us). Does this sound like the worst idea? Am I possibly about to blow up my marriage by doing this?

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I think its your only real option to be honest, he is needing to be flexible and not make it personal, you'll get support and then you can go home when he starts, it might be the breathing space you both need

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I think your Hudband is being unreasonable.

It honestly seems like the best option and your son will have you there while you head to your mom's but have the needed support.

I work fully remote and days daycare is closed is sooo hard to get any work done 🙃. Last time daycare closed due to wheather... I lost my wedding band ring 🥴 (still missing). I discovered LO has learned to pull objects to use to stand on to give a boost. And got into my jewelry box. I am currently 33 weeks pregnant and my rings are getting too tight so I have stopped wearing them for now. But sucks I have like a $2k ring I love missing 😭. I know I will come across it but its my fault ultimately because i was distracted in a meeting.

With toddlers you need the support to watch them especially if you have meetings and my job has a lot of meetings.... Its too much.

And i tots get when you can't take time off. Like i am in count down and I have projects that need done before I leave. So yeah.. He needs to be open minded here.

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If you are the breadwinner, then I'm sorry, his thoughts have to come second right now. And I'd say the same for me - my husband is the breadwinner, so my thoughts when it comes to his work/our financial security also come second. We have to do whatever we have to do to ensure our income. Because my husband is the breadwinner, I have also made the most sacrifices when it comes to childcare, but that's just a part of the territory! As long as you and your baby are safe, it shouldn't be an issue for you to do what's best for work right now.

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Resentment and placing blame on partner

Firstly, please don’t judge me - I’m aware all my thoughts aren’t rational and I do already feel badly about them

I’m finding myself becoming easily frustrated, annoyed, and placing a lot of blame on my partner for many things. Now I’d get it if he was rubbish but he’s not - he has the baby straight away when he gets home from work, he lets me get ready and shower before he goes to work, he pitches in with the chores and gives me any time I ask for off. He doesn’t go out loads either.

I do a lot of the mental labour - realising we need more of and purchasing clothes, milk, groceries, deciding dinner, cooking, cleaning, thinking about what baby needs, etc.

However I just find myself annoyed and blaming him for so many things I find difficult. I know this isn’t fair, but it’s almost like I’m angry that he’s finding it easy and I’m not. Angry if I’ve just got the baby to sleep and he doesn’t think and closes doors to loudly. Angry when he doesn’t dress baby warm enough, or when he puts him in a car seat with a coat on. When he forgets a blanket or doesn’t wash his hands and plays with him. When hes snoring and I’ve just got the baby to drift off.

We have had many conversations and he has tried to take loads off me but it never feels like enough for me to stop being annoyed with him.

Am I experiencing some sort of post partum mental health issues? I find myself upset and crying a lot. any advice would help.

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Could you show me some of the lunches you've been giving your baby? Or have you been been letting the nursery deal with the food?

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Parenting 24/7 is harder than going to work full time?

I’m having a debate with my partner as he’s done nothing to help since. Our 14 month old was born, I’ve done it all alone all day and all night. He gets a break when he comes in from work all night I never get a break
He try’s to tell me it’s harder going to work full time 5 days a week than parenting ALONE 24/7?
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What would u do? What should i do

So to try to explain this in the best way possible I have a very small apartment.
I opened my back door which leads directly to the laundry room of the building. Lately, I started bringing my son in the laundry room with me because he bangs on the door and tries to get out.

Today I opened the door to get my stuff out of the dryer. I saw I guess my neighbor putting stuff in the washer. It’s a very tight space so I closed the door and was planning on going back after he leave instead of crowding up the space with the baby. Plus I was in shorts and had no bra on, it was an older man.

I latched my door with the dead lock as I usually do so that I do not get locked out and I just left it that way without thinking about it.

I turned my back walk maybe about 5-7steps. My apartment is barely 15 steps front to back.
Turn around. Realize my baby is GONE he’s only 16 months!

I start yelling for him. I approach the door and I hear my son laughing…
The man had opened my door to lure my son in the laundry room with him without me knowing!!!!!!!

They were playing 🤯

He was there for no more then 20-30 seconds if that. It happened so fast, he doesn’t speak good English he’s polish
My door usually slams loud when closed, so this was done quietly…..


When I discovered that the man was with my son, I was trying to simply take my kid back in the house, but he continued on playing and I was yelling at my son that he shouldn’t be wondering without me.

No, first off I know for a fact, my son did not open the door number one. It’s very heavy and number two. He doesn’t know how to open doors yet.

And I asked the man straight out did my son open the door and he said no I did.

My son could get the door to open maybe an inch, I know that. So he must have done that and the man just decided to open it and bring my son with him.

I’m so outraged. Annoyed, uncomfortable. I live alone just me and my son.

What do I do?

I don’t know if he is maybe a visitor, I see his car sometimes but usually it’s another person who looks like him with a different car. Maybe my neighbors dad is my best bet.


Anyway. What should I do? Should I bring this to management. Should I approach my neighbor and figure out exactly who that was?

Thanks ladies wish me luck

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The more natural the method the better ladies 😣
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