Help me settle a debate with my husband 🙃

I plan on naming my daughter (if I have one) P.J
But on her birth certificate it would be “Parker jr”

I told my husband today that fine, we can have our son be a Jr and we can name him his name.. but now my husband is like getting upset because I don’t want our son to also have his same middle name 🤦‍♀️ like wtf bro all our kids literally have your last name already I’m the one putting in all the work to carry and birth the kids I want to choose the middle name and we can still call him CJ in this case, and he’s like no that’s not how it works.. like what kind of egotistical shit is it to name your kid your EXACT first middle and last name cmon😅 I want his middle name to be something I love

I dont think its considered a legal Jr but most people who name their kids like this still call them junior

My son is a Jr. He has the same first and middle name as my husband.

Are you asking as a nickname ? Sorry if I’m not understanding correctly ☺️

yeah this is what my husband is saying that you can’t put jr on the BC if it’s not the same exact name first and middle and I’m like no.. there’s literally no laws to that, it’s all made up we can do whatever we want 😂

I’m just saying that’s the way it’s traditionally done correct? But you can still put JR on the BC because there’s no laws about it and can still call them a jr lol

yes, traditionally/technically a jr. has the same first and middle name. But ya, I’m not 100% on the birth certificate thing. I think you can do whatever the hell you want ! lol

it’s a suffix, it’s available on birth certificates. My daughter would still have a middle name, but she’d be referred to as pj or Parker junior, cause it’d be “Parker ___ junior “our last name” on paper

Pretty sure you can only be a junior if they have the exact name, meaning first middle and last name. At least legally.

I know I’m just saying that a prerequisite to using that box is not that legally they have to have the same first and last name right? It’s just traditionally done that way

correct! Yeah yeah it’s a choice you can make but not required to be used. You also can put junior as the middle name instead of choosing the suffix

okay yeah that’s what I thought but idk now, it seems like he wants all or nothing which feels selfish to me because they’re all already getting his last name 😂 ugh I’m just so tired of the name thing

do you want jr on the birth certificate ? I don’t see why you can’t choose the middle name and then just call him jr anyway ya know?

ugh what I’m so much more confused now, so if I use that Jr Suffix box and he doesn’t have the same middle name what are they going to do after I turn in the BC😂🤦‍♀️

yeah that’s what I’d like to do but my husband is being a stinker about it all and wants it official, honestly none of it even matters how often is someone looking at your birth certificate hahah

I agree. Sorry he’s being annoying lol!

Traditionally “Junior is used to distinguish a son with the same name as his father. The following conditions apply:
1. The Junior must be a son of the father, not a grandson.
2. The names must be exactly the same, including the middle name.
3. The father must still be living.” But the traditions don’t hold up legally; pretty sure you can fill out a birth certificate with the jr suffix even if the middle name isn’t the same.

I’m sure you can put Jr on the BC because Junior is an actual name as well so 🤷🏻‍♀️

“There are no legal requirements dictating that a "Junior" must have the same middle name as the person they are designated as "Junior" after”
They won’t hand you back the birth certificate and say you did it wrong if you decide to put junior on there anywhich way

Well my LB Is going to be called CJ but his name will be Callum James and my partner’s name is Callum

My son is a third (III) and has a different middle name because Eugene wasn’t happening.

Is there a benefit to “legally” being a jr? Why does it matter?

so who’s to stop anyone from filling it out the birth certificate that way? That’s just the traditional norms behind it, not law 😃

nah no benefit at all, just something my husband is being weird about wanting lol

nope. Just a way to distinguish the two people.

well I did it, and it’s legally his name so 😳🤣 People refer to him as C3. It just is what it is, but I like giving the bird to rules anyway. Pure anarchy.

EXACTLY.

I know I just responded that because you said it had to be a certain way but from reading the comments it seems like people can kinda just do what they want :)

I think it has to be the full name to be a junior. My husband is a junior and on all paperwork he has to state his full name WITH junior at the end or it will be filed under his dad’s name.

@Autumn I think you should definitely pick the name you want for at least the middle name. I personally low-key find the whole junior thing weird, as in naming someone exactly the same as yourself. It has egotistical/narcissistic leanings, imo and I think if women started doing that routinely/regularly, that would be viewed as a more obvious take but we are used to the menfolk doing it. Just my take anyway, but wtf would you want your child to have your exact name? It's not even practical when it comes to receiving letters/notices etc. Don't you want your child to be its own person. Would you name your daughter exactly your name or feel any type of way about that?

the lady at the hospital doing our birth certificate paperwork said there’s been a steady increase over the last decade in women giving their daughters a jr suffix!!! After she heard me say if we had a girl she’d be a junior she said a few on the unit had done that within the last few months before we were in lol

I thought if they have the first name of their parent they’re junior, if they have their first and last name they’re “*insert name* the second”

“the second, third, etc” is when a person is named after a family member that is not the child’s father !

Like a grandfather or any deceased relative

yeah no I feel the same way which is why I don’t want him to have the exact same name, I couldn’t imagine naming my daughters my exact same name, it’s just strange imo so yeah I will jot be doing that with my son I’m just trying to prove a point to my husband, but if he’s not satisfied with having just the first name then we’ll scrap the whole junior thing all together and just find a different name

@Parker 又 funnily enough, my grandma was before her time and did this with my eldest aunt but she really is very narcissistic so maybe I have somewhat skewed view but then again, I really don't think I'd like it anyway. I just don't get it personally. What made you want to do it? If you don't mind sharing?

my son is a jr., it was actually my decision, not my husbands ☺️

yeah, scrap it altogether, problem solved then hahaha and your bundle will make their own mark on the world with their own identity. X

I agree giving the EXACT same name like middle the same and everything is fucking weird.

I really like the idea of doing PJ for my daughter cause it’s uncommon for girls to be both juniors and or Parker’s
but I wouldn’t dream of giving away my middle name too! And it will be a true rarity the full legal name of “Parker junior” would be used anyways & most People would assume that’s her dads name anyways LOLOLOL

@Parker 又 thanks for your take your name is unusual/interesting so I can see a little more why you'd want to continue it but also with your baby going by PJ and you Parker it won't feel as obvious and you two will still have your own IDs in that sense. X

of course!! It’s something I had thought about since I was little & learned about suffix’s like junior existing; cause I have a typically “male” name myself, I always thought it’d be fun to bend the norm & do it with my future daughter!

But if my partner said he wanted to make a son a junior I think I’d have some heavy side eyeing I’d be doing

oh I never knew that. Tbh it’s not a thing we do where I live but I always just thought first name was “junior” and full name was the 2nd, the 3rd etc

yeah the thing is that I actually think for my family naming our son my husbands first name would be very special, for one because it took my husband a long time to grow into loving his name and now he really appreciates it, (it’s Chancelor) but mostly because my husband was an oopsie baby and his dad wasn’t ever there for him, and then later on his dad had another son and made THAT one a junior and is active in his life.. so it was very hurtful for my husband as the first born son to deal with that name thing plus the abandonment and I think this would be really healing for him ❤️ plus I just really love the name and my husband is an amazing man and I think it’s a nice way to honor him but I don’t want the exact same name I want to choose the middle one for myself :)

@Autumn that makes sense as to why you guys want to do it, but for me, your husbands story with his name is his own personal story. Your child will be their own person, but again, that's just my take on the naming after thing. If you love it, I love it for you, though, it's just not something I can appreciate. Your child will still have the same name as your partner in most circumstances/settings as it's not usual to call whole names out, first, middle, last, so for me, it's kind of the same deal.

I mean every single name has its own story that’s decided by the parents, not the child, and absolutely doesn’t mean that you aren’t going to let them be their own person so I don’t really understand the inability to appreciate one but not the other but thanks for the input!

Jesus 🙄

Didn't you also state you found it egotistical in your top comment? But yes, do what suits you guys obviously. You had asked about having a different middle name and if it made a difference to being a junior and it doesn't really, in the way, your husband and child will be called in everyday life situations. Irrespective of the birth certificate.
Most names have some story and meaning, yes, but within one family, they are much less personalised if 2 people in the same house have the same name. By nature of doing it, you are attaching the name to another person in very close vicinity. This is why I view it differently to any other names anyone might pick out, but it's about how you view it so.....

I said jokingly that it seems egotistical to name your kid your exact same name yes 😂 but I would never argue with someone about what they choose to name their kid. And I think having a different middle name makes a big difference but in the grande scheme of things it doesn’t matter too much as long as you parent with the intentions of letting your kid be an individual. I’m named after my great grandmother and absolutely love that about my name. For some people it’s really special, to you it’s obviously not lol but that’s okay

This app amazes me everyday. Even because of a name people are arguing…

Ok, fair enough. I thought you weren't keen on the idea either, but I'm glad you are happy with it. All the best

My fiancé said our son wouldn’t be the 4th (my fiancé is III) if he got a diff middle name, we did my dads name for the middle instead and he corrects everyone he’s not a junior or the same name idk it’s to whoever it matters to I feel like