Would you allow someone else to tell your child off if they were misbehaving?

I’ve had to tell 5 year olds off for pushing my 1 year old daughter over. And if the parent wants to talk to me about it they can, but if my daughter did the same, I’d expect the other parent to say something also!

* edit
No yelling involved, literally saying no you shouldn’t push her over she’s a baby

how they do it matters to me but in general I'm okay with it

Okay I hear “telling off” and assume yelling. Unless the behavior is dangerous I won’t accept someone yelling at my kid. I’m totally fine with someone coaching them though.

My toddler was toddlering in gymnastics today and her coach didn’t give her the end of class rewards and explained that wasn’t acceptable behavior in class. Totally fine with that kind of thing though.

In that exact scenario, if he’s pushed someone else and I haven’t seen it, I wouldn’t have an issue with another parent saying to him “hey, that wasn’t kind, you shouldn’t push” or something to that effect, and then letting him know they’re going to bring it to my attention.
I don’t want him going around hurting anyone, so if I’ve missed it, let me know and I’ll carry on the conversation and he’d have an appropriate consequence.

What I wouldn’t be happy about is if they shouted, were rude to him etc.

One time my son (newly 3) was on a bouncy castle at a party and some other, much older, kid grabbed his hood and forcefully pulled him to the ground. I politely said what he did wasn’t very kind. I wanted my son to see that I’ll stand up for him, and know that behaviour isn’t acceptable, that the standard he’s held to is what’s right. I didn’t see that kids mum, but had she been there, I would have told her.

My child listens when she’s told off by others far more than to me!

maybe a difference in terms where you’re from. In the UK “telling off” doesn’t necessarily mean yelling, simply being told you’ve done something wrong/not nice/naughty etc.

I'm okay with anyone address8ng my child if they're doing something like hitting another child or even snatching. I'm always okay with a correction as I always correct children at the park when it involves my child.

But tone and words matter. If they cussed my child out then absolutely the fuck not. If they took it upon themselves to put hands on my child helll fucking no. Even if they grabbed my child in anyway it's a hard no.

For me "I told them off" and "I spoke with them" have very different meanings.

I’m in the states. It could just be the way I take the phrase too lol! I’ve always heard it being used in reference to yelling 😅

yeah, I find that a lot on here, with confusion and misjudgments based on different terminology 😂

As long as there’s no yelling, yeah for sure. I want my boys to learn the natural consequences of their actions, good or bad. You upset someone else’s mama, you’re gonna hear about it.

This has happened in a soft play as my son was trying to join in with some boys that were being rough and tumble although he’s autistic so he didn’t really pay the mum much attention. I think it depends how they are speaking to your child.

Telling them what they did wrong is fine. I’ve told children to share or play nicely with my child and other people’s children but I wouldn’t be okay with them shouting at or ridiculing my child. I’d be furious then.

Yeah! That’s for sure a learning moment for the both of us. Not if she’s swearing though lol

If I’m around I’d rather they let me step in and tell them off, if they gently told them no we don’t do that then I’m okay with it but if they were screaming I’d be like HELL NO

100% because I would do the same to another child. If they’re misbehaving I’ll call them out on it and then ask where their mum/dad/whoever they’re with is and tell them “I’ve had to say something to your child because oh X reason”.
I’ve been in situations where instinct has made me say something to someone else’s child and I’ve apologised to the mother whilst I’m with them or whoever and they’ve said please don’t apologise they need to learn and so it works both ways.

Yes. Me and my friend group, and my sisters, tell off each others kids when necessary. I’m not always in the room, or I have my back turned. I am thankful and expect you to tell him of for me if I can’t. He knows he can’t misbehave just because Mums not in the room. One bestie is a lash tech the other bestie likes getting extensions so once every 2m I look after all 5 kids for 1.5hrs while one does the others’ lashes lol, I tell off whoever needs telling off out of the 5 kids, coz their Mums are busy and can’t. To me it takes a village, the kids don’t misbehave just because their mums not in the room, they know they can’t act up.

personally this was my take on it too

It depends on the situation. Teachers, yes. My friends, yes. My kids’ family, yes. Strangers? Probably not.

Telling off sounds intense so yes I have a problem with that. But if another mom says “we don’t push” or something then that’s fine if it affected her kid.

My boy got pulled by his clothes at playgroup, i spoke softly to the other boy and told him we dont do that and we need to share our toys, there's nothing wrong aslong as you aren't shouting at them or anything

Absolutely!! Behavior should be corrected always not just when your around. If your child misbehaved around me and you’re not paying attention I will correct the behavior and speak to them about it for sure. I would never shout at a child or touch them but certainly won’t ignore bad behavior

As long as there's no yelling or inappropriate language, I have no problem. I'd definitely say something to another kid like "Oh, don't do that it's not nice/ safe" and would be fine with similar being said to my LB

If done in an appropriate way