Meal train

Hi there! I had a spouse set up a meal train but my parents yelled at me over the phone saying it’s tacky to beg for “food and money” when the newborn gets here. It left me crying, I’m not trying to beg for food and money, I just am going to I assume try to sleep, feed the baby and try to stay sane. Has anyone done meal trains before and have they helped? Are they tacky? I don’t care if someone brings me 2 dollar buttered noodles LOL it will help

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Definitely not tacky!! So many people do them and they’re so needed. We didn’t do a formal meal train but tons of people sent us Venmo’s and DoorDash gift cards and that helped immensely to not worry about meals for a while

Absolutely not tacky! I know of many people who did them. I actually asked my grandma for some meals when she asked if there was anything else we needed for baby. It helped us out so much those first few days. We also had friends send us DoorDash gift cards too.

I have never tried one but no they are not tacky. Meal trains allow you to get something to eat but be able to focus on you and baby without having to cook. Keep the meal train and don’t listen to your parents.

Thank you all for the support. It means a lot

I have always loved bringing meals to families with new babies! Not tacky at all!

Definitely not tacky and would be so helpful!

Not tacky! It’s actually so common now and a great idea.

Every mom in my mom group has done one and I think it’s insane to not want to support a new mom. They are tacky

You are going to appreciate every single meal and gift card you receive. Unless your mom is planning to cook all of your meals, she really shouldn’t be so harsh. If it makes you feel better, my mother was raised in the south and meals were expected after a baby was born. my mom thought it was tacky too put a honeymoon fund on our wedding registry. But she was all for a meal train option for a baby registry.

We did one and have participated in others. Very common, not tacky, and SO helpful! Highly recommend.

It's not tacky at all its down home pleasant and good Ole country living a friend of mine got trampled by bulls at work the other day the whole neighborhood brought them casseroles I did too and I don't even like casseroles but I brought her some because it's hard to be a mother injured and keep up with cooking there's nothing tacky about needing help and getting it it's the village everyone is always talking about in fact if you lived a smidgen closer im in Colorado I'd bring you dinner too it's just what good folks do if someone is hurt dead or born you bring by food

We didn’t do a formal one - but we had a ton of people insist that they would drop off food. It was so lovely! The first week or two it’s really nice not to worry about cooking. I also did a bunch of cooking in advance to fill in the gaps and froze stuff like breakfast burritos and other one handed eating meals 😂 (my baby has a six sense and always wants to be held when I am trying to eat).

In previous generations, Moms used to be surrounded by community that would take care of her and baby postpartum- hence the “it takes a village” phrase! Meal trains are a way of incorporating some of that now! Tell her you’ll get rid of it if she wants to bring you a meal a few nights/week, bc momma needs to eat! ;)

Definitely do a meal train! Ours has been so so so helpful!

in our community

Is this clever or cruel?

My husband and i were talking and with social media and the internet in general being a terrifying dumpster fire, we are trying to figure out the best way to keep our son safe while still teaching him how to safely be online and moderation.

We landed on the idea of giving him the 90's kid treatment. A computer in the living room for us to keep an eye on what hes doing online, and once we feel hes mature enough to hang with friends without adult supervision he gets a flip phone. When we feel he is responsible enough and he earns and saves up the money for the physical phone, case, and screen cover, then we will be happy to take him to get a smart phone.

I thought this was air tight, but now my brother says its cruel to give a kid a flip phone, and besides he can just use his friends phones at school.

My husband and i remember a time before the internet, and we remember having complete access to something no one understood yet. We saw unspeakable things and are always battling with the urge to put the phone and social media down. I dont want that for my son, especially with his brain so vulnerable still.

If your partners parent passes away

And you and that parent didn't get along are you still go to the funeral?

Not my situation!

Partner no longer wants baby #2

Before our son was born we originally both wanted minimum 2 kids but we were hoping for 3-4. My partner found the birth traumatic to watch and also struggled a lot with the newborn/baby stage. He no longer wants to have any more children and it’s completely breaking my heart. I need another baby. We’ve spoken about it a lot and the options. He said he wasn’t COMPLETELY closed off to it so I asked him to try and work through his feelings and reconsider his decision. He eventually said he definitely doesn’t want another. I know that I will always want one and my feelings will never change. Do we have to break up or does anyone know anything else I can do to help change his mind? Has anyone else’s partner said this and then changed their mind? I don’t want to break up because I adore him and our life together and I’d hate to split up our family for “selfish” reasons and make my son miss out on having both of us together but I just don’t know what to do

Nursery funding

My child turned 9 months last week. I applied for government funded hours nearly 2 months ago and so well within the required timeframe for the April term, however upon receiving my first invoice without the funding applied and having questioned this, I have now been informed that the stretched funding doesn’t start until 4th May.

Has anyone else been told it won’t start until May?

The government site states it should start from April 1st, and so I intentionally set my nursery start and return to work as the start of April for that reason, knowing that I wouldn’t be able to afford the nursery on my sole income without the funding

Jealous of my husband

I’m so jealous of him and it’s making me resentful. We have a ten week old and I’m jealous that he is at work all day. I’m jealous he can leave for lunch and actually eat an uninterrupted lunch. Take a phone call uninterrupted. Chat with a friend he runs in to uninterrupted. Even go to the bathroom when he wants uninterrupted. He comes home from work when he wants. He’s not on a set schedule. Some days are late some are early. It depends on when he’s done. I’m jealous he can come home at 10pm and shower, eat and go right to bed uninterrupted because I already have the baby asleep. He doesn’t have to worry about anything house wise or baby wise because I’ve done it all. Meanwhile I’m covered in puke and crap and smell like rotten milk. When he is home he is VERY active and helpful. So it’s not that. I’m just jealous his world hasn’t changed and mine has I guess. This isn’t something he’s doing wrong so I’m not sure how to get past this. I wish I could keep him home all day because that’s how helpful he is, but I understand he obv needs to work.

Calpol

My mum has just given my 4 year old calpol because he asked for it. He isn’t poorly (although was last week, been fine this week) he just likes the taste of it. My mum didn’t check, didn’t ask, just gave it to him and when I’ve questioned her she said “he asked for it”. Then quizzed 4 year old who said he asked for it because it tastes nice.

How would you react?