Baby not really eating small things much with hands. My little guy loves using utensils. He has from basically day 1 of trying to eat. He will pick up larger objects like a slice of fruit but won’t pick up smaller things like a cheerio.

Any suggestions?? Is this like truly a problem and I need like to seriously work on it with him or should I be concerned? Or is it kind of whatever and it will happen in time? I am trying not to cater to his desire to use utensils for almost everything. But it’s tough to see him squish food and not put it in his mouth and then put it in him mouth if I put it on a fork. So I’m going to try to not put it on a fork and whatnot as much. But I’m just not sure how concerned and stressed about this I should be?

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From what my pediatrician has told me is that at 9 months of age, the baby should be using the pointer finger and thumb to pick up items whether it’s small or big. Would try and work on these with him! I don’t foresee it being a huge issue, and you can always ask your son’s pediatrician too for recommendations! Download the milestones app, it tells you different ages what babies should be doing by then.

I have definitely seen him use his thumb and pointer finger for toys and strings and stuff. But not for food. I think he likes his fork and spoon too much lol. He’s hit all his milestones so I think he like cognitively fine. I guess his utensils are just a bit of a crutch. We will work on it with him! Any tips?

I honestly see no issue with him wanting to use utensils. It allows him to have better motor skill development and encourages independence. Maybe do chunk size pieces (that he’s able to safely chew/swallow) and try to get him to use his fingers. Show him a few times of you picking it up and feeding it to him and he will eventually get the hang of it!

I’ve given my son the rice teethers as they are bigger to handle instead of the star puff things. I started feeding my son purées at 4 months as he showed interest in my food when we’d eat dinner. I did mistake the milestones. Picking up items with pointer finger and thumb is 12 months. Raking food towards themselves is the 9 month milestone. I have strayed away from purées because my son basically wants nothing to do with them. He only wants the fruits in purées but not vegetables. So I started feeding him bite size pieces of vegetables as well as whatever meat I cook to get him used to picking up smaller things. I’m also a FTM so all is new to me as well. My sons in the 98% percentile, weighing 25 lbs at 27 inches long and just turned exactly 9 months 5 days ago.

Same here! She uses her pincer grasp to pick up small pieces of food but never puts it in her mouth. Spoon? Right in the mouth. Toys? Right in the mouth 😂

Babies will get there!

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I've finally done it

I have finally done it. I have finally become the trope, the stereotype.

I have become bitter, resentful, and very overwhelmed and overloaded. I am very unhappy and hit burnout. And I snapped at my husband last night. I work full-time, and work has been very busy so im working late a lot. Im also in grad school. I also have a toddler that has become VERY clingy with me. My husband works shorter days but commutes, so he usually gets home after me by an hour or more. When he gets home, he usually heads to the restroom for at least 30 mins when he gets home. And now my toddler doesnt want anything to do with him. So im doing all the toddler duties until bed. I dont get 5 mins to myself. Not for almost 2 years. I finally hit my wall. I have also, somehow, become my MILs medical ride service and she somehow has an appt every week, it seems?! Shes not sick!! My husband was complaining that he needs to change routine to fit in a workout sometimes, and I lost it. I have been BEGGING for 5 mins to myself for months. I have been telling him how im not good, im going to burn out for months. And between his attitude and him complaining (which really got me b/c he blames me for not being able to work out?! Saying I need help when he gets home so he just cant workout now) I just lost it completely. I told him how unfair my life has become and I have the entire mental and emotional load and it is just not fair. He got mad at me and said "hes trying" when hes literally not trying at all. What do I do?? No one is taking the load from me! And im done and dont know what to do now.
I do not like this version of me.

AITA?

This isn't a major issue, just wondering if I'm being a bit of an asshole.

• I do shift work, 5 out of 7 days, full-time.
• My partner works from home (mostly, sometimes he goes into the office) M-F, full-time.

Anyway, whenever I have a day off during the week he gets in his feelings when I make myself food (breakfast and lunch) but not him. His reason is he's working, I'm not - Which is fair but I've asked him how many times on a weekend has he gotten up, on his day off and made me breakfast and a lunch to take with me to work? You guessed it, 0.

So basically, just because I'm at home I don't think the responsibility to feed him should automatically fall on me when he manages to feed himself just fine while I'm at work.

Big vent!

Hi mums.
I'm a first time mum in my 40s to twin boys.They are almost 5 months old and the biggest miracle in my life!
I am struggling!!!
I'm pretty sure I have ppa as my pregnancy was a very high risk and all I remember was crying from anxiety of all the ifs!Thankfully even born at 35 weeks and skinny,didn't need iu time.
My husband is not helping much because he's always too busy with work.He will "look" after them usually between 8pm-12am so I can have a chance to sleep.
He expects me to just sleep when I touch the pillow,even though I hear tje babies crying and him don't really bother because most of the times he'll be on his laptop working.
When I tell him I can't relax to fall asleep because I feel you r neglecting the babies,he says I'm the problem becauae I'm always there with them and don't give them alone time!!
I am angry!!I am furious!!
I can't keep.up.with housework becauae someone alwaya neess me and most of the times they nap I either cook and clean tje kitchen,do laundry or try and take a quick nap.
He doesn't help.around the house,becauae..guess what?always super busy.
I asked him nicely we could clean the house together every Saturday morning so it's easier and quicker for both of us and he said no,because he has a lot of work but probably wants to sleep until 12 or 2.
2 days ago a button of his coat ripped and I told him I'll sew it these days.
Earlier this morning while running late for his work,as always,he weara the coat and told him didn't get the chance to fix the button and sarcastically said..of.course u didn't!!!
I spent all night awake because one of the babies had congested nose and we've been trying to reduce one fees at night.
I wanted to punch him!!He left and I started crying...I cry so much,even at 5 months pp...
I can't go on like this anymoreeeee...
The crying in my ears is constant..my head is always numb..I've gained so much weight and can't find the strength to get back on track..
Even if I try to.find a therapist to just talk,is it gonna help?I really don't know😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Avoidant husband

I love my husband and he is a good man. We have some issues in our relationship however, as he has an avoidant attachment style (finds romance/intimacy/being emotional difficult). This comes from him having to be independent from a young age and having quite an abusive mother.
The issues in our relationship are mainly around a lack of sex and intimacy. I think the problem is that to feel turned on, I need to feel connected and wanted. My husband (being avoidant) will usually make jokes about being horny whereas I would want to have someone make me feel beautiful/sexy to get in the mood.
It sounds terrible but I've sometimes had dreams about exes that would make me feel this way, and the romance we had (eye contact, intensity, deep words). It makes me feel really guilty but I feel like i'm starved of that. My husband would like a lot more sex but I can't always force myself if I'm not feeling it.
We've spoken a bit about therapy but I know its often really expensive so we probably wouldn't be able to afford it. Do you have any suggestions please? I know that neither of us are wrong in what we want, just different but I'm scared about whether we can fix it or if we're doomed?