How do your partners handle the messy parenting moments?

I don't think its a dad thing. Just a people thing. I am like that dad I cannot handle bodily fluids, mine , my child, whoever. They had to wipe my baby completely off before handing him to me when giving birth because I constantly freaked out over the fluids. When he spits up I immediately change shirts and sheets(if it got on there) I stay with multiple receiving blankets everywhere I go to wipe drool and snot ( I have a few in each room of my house) lol so needless to say its not just a dad thing at all. Sorry that he scared the baby though, I can understand how that would have been sad to see

No it’s not a dad thing. Just this past Friday my husband was on the phone with our home warranty and he was watching our daughter since I was working (wfm) I came out cause I heard my daughter coughing she had puked and he was sitting in the play pen with his hand catching her throw up since he didn’t have a towel or anything so as soon as I seen I grabbed a towel and a new outfit for her n he cleaned it up without issue. So I feel it just depends on the person.

My husband is the other way around. He knows I don’t handle puke well and he’s basically taken it upon himself to be the puke guy. Our toddler had an awful stomach bug three days after we brought our newborn home and my husband took 100% of toddler duty while I hunkered down in the bedroom with the newborn. He’s literally my hero lol

I think it can be both. I would have been the same. It comes down to character and values. You put your baby first over discomforts because you value your babies comfort over your distress. I am the same. I will literally be falling apart just to keep my baby asleep for her wellbeing. Her dad cannot do the same.

It can be hard and stressful and this is while relationships fall apart when babies arrive.

Focus on what he does well.. if you are struggling to even find that.. well maybe it’s the person.

Nope. My husband has autism and I was so ready for that to be the biggest struggle for him. He’s never done great with icky stuff like poop and whatever. We’ve got a six month old now and he’s been peed on, pooped on, and puked on. Handles every situation fabulously. Every time I compliment him on it, he says “I’m a dad now. I’ve got to be able to handle this stuff now.”

My husband and I both have moments where we realize we can't prioritize our son and have to tap the other one in. My son is teething and weve spent the last few days just switching off so one of us can get a break. I handle the crying way better than my husband does but he can handle no sleep better than I can. He's fine with poop but doesn't want to handle dinner time now that our son is eating solids and they're everywhere lol. You each need to find your strengths but if he is never prioritizing your child than that's different and a problem

My partner doesn’t care but he’s a farmer 😄

I think it probably depends on a lot of things, like how good their emotional regulation is in general, how they were parented around things like this (if someone got mad at them for messes etc).
I think women do often naturally have a more instinctual caring drive, and this has been ingrained through society and men aren't as 'free' to even experience their emotions, let alone communicate them. I would look at the whole picture, if your partner is trying to overcome things, what else they help with etc. 100% something to be said for working to each others strengths and communicating things in a neutral way 'it really helps me when..'
'i feel....when you....because...
I need...'