Coming into our bed most nights

There's a lot of studies now that don't support leaving them to cry it out alone. It harms their little brains and teaches them hopelessness.. that no one will come if they cry.

We've always struggled with sleep for my daughter who's going to be 4 in May. We were referred to a sleep specialist at the children's centre in Hucknall who was a huge help.
We had to make some changes to her bedroom and evening routine which helped.
We still have bad nights now and again, as does everyone. Especially during illness.

What does he tell you is the cause when you ask him?

Thank you for your message.

What changes did you make if you don’t mind me asking? Bedtime is a breeze, we pop him down, read stories and walk out.

He always says he doesn’t know why he wakes up and gets upset. Which doesn’t help 😩. I know at some point they will grow out of it but it’s hard when you’re in it with no light at the end of the tunnel!

My little boy has always always been a bad sleeper, up a few times a night. A couple of months ago it got really bad, night terrors, growing pains, suddenly scared of the dark, scared of monsters etc etc. Could it be any of this? Seems to have coincided with a lot more imaginary play etc for my son. It seems to have settled down the last week or so and he’s proud of himself for staying in his room until his yoto goes green.

Thanks ! Does he go back to bed or come in with you? We went through a stage that he would wake up one or two times a night but I would just tuck him back in and leave and he’d be fine with that. But he’s been wanting to come into our bed which is the habit we formed when he was not well over winter.

It’s hard to know what it is because he says he doesn’t know. But then sometimes he can explain some dreams he’s had so I assume maybe he has some bad dreams. I think it’s more habitual now because it’s more often than not now he wants to come into our bed.

We used to use the green/red light on the Yoto but that worked only some of the time. Maybe we need to go back to that to give another go.

We got a different bed and let her choose which side of the room she wanted to sleep on and hung a canopy over it (she said she wanted a tent) to help her feel safer. A new nightlight that changes colours, swapped white noise for soft waves sounds and took down a painting of a hare from the wall. The sleep specialist said go lie on her bed in the dark and see what she sees. The hare painting looked really scary in the dark so it had to go!
A lot is trial and error. Keep a diary of when he wakes and see if there's a pattern. He might not be linking his cycles as we sleep in 90 mins cycles. Could be some noises outside like someone coming home from a late shift? Etc