Anyone else about to completely burn out or breakdown?

So I am at rock bottom.

I have no job, currently don't drive (working on both), live with my parents (cannot move right now but working on it), and am a SAHM to an AUDHD 4 year old.

I am drowning with everything on my shoulders. Grief over my beautiful pet that I had to let go to rainbow bridge 2 weeks ago after a rapid decline in her health likely due to an undiagnosed illness. I am dealing with 3 different therapists for my kiddo, have to deal with NDIS to approve funding for the 3rd, I am struggling with his swimming (we pay $22 for 30 minutes but his behaviour is shit ao we have had to leave after 15 minutes every lesson this year bar one) and have to look into getting him into a specialised swimming school but with me not driving that is not easy.

On top of this I am trying to get him into care and trying to organise school for next year, so have to ring schools, apply to schools, sort out support unit or in class support (we have applied to 1 school already).

Our kiddo is also struggling with toilet training which is beyond fucking exhausting.

I feel like a complete failure, like I he deserves a mum who ia on top of all this, who can drive and isn't terrified (literally debilitating fear) of doing so. Who has a good job and can afford stuff for her child.

I basically have a very limited wardrobe and no funds to get anything new; multiple pairs of the same jeans, 2 white shirts (only shirts I wear out), 3 skirts, 2 dresses and 2 pairs of shoes that I rotate between. I had 3 pairs of shoes but my thongs broke and I can't afford to replace them.

I have had to stop having a social life (unless what we do is free) as I can't afford it.

My partner and I need couples therapy but can't afford it.

I try to clean the house but I just can't do it well enough. I apparently am completely incapable of organising our flat.

I owe my parents nearly $3000 for vet care for my pet.

I am just beyond exhausted and I feel like I am at rock bottom. I've honestly considered taking my own life.

Everyone would be better off.

Yes I am in therapy but despite just finding a new therapist after a over a year, I will likely have to stop as we can't really afford it.

Yeah I am a fucking mess.

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You can text me and we can talk.

You are enough!!! This world needs you in it!!! Think of how much you mean to your little one 💕 take things one day at a time, one task at a time.

I’m really glad you said something, because holding all of that in alone is too much for one person. You’ve got grief, money stress, parenting stress, relationship stress… of course you feel like you’re drowning. That doesn’t make you a failure, it means you’re overwhelmed.
And I need to say this gently but clearly: the thought that “everyone would be better off without you” is something depression tells people when they’re exhausted. It’s not truth, it’s the illness talking. Your kid doesn’t need a “perfect” mom, he needs you.
You’re still showing up through all of this, even when it feels impossible. That counts more than you think.
If therapy isn’t affordable right now, there are usually low-cost or free options (community services, sliding scale, even hotlines/text lines) just to keep you supported while things are this intense. You deserve support, not to carry this alone.
You’re not a mess. You’re a human being under way too much

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