Question for SAHM

What do your husbands do in order for you to stay home? How does your budgets look? Is anyone who isn’t a SAHM struggling? How many children do you have?

Read more on Peanut

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.

Learn more about our guidelines.
Add a comment
Avatar

My husband is a powder coater painter making $30hr and getting paid every week

Avatar

Currently we are staying with family because our truck is draining our bank account in repairs

Avatar

My husband works in sales for an AV company. Some months we are tight and then a bigger commission month roles around. I also have 5 hours of remote work i do a week and in May am bringing in 1 kiddo 2 days a week for extra income

Avatar

My husband will stay at home when our first is born, and I will work. I work for a technology company managing relationships. No student loans, no car payments, mortgage is $2,300/month, other reoccurring bills (phone, internet, car insurance, etc.), is about $400/month, food is about $500/month … we live somewhat frugally but travel a ton. Have two dogs with occasional vet bills. We do have a side furniture business that’s bringing in a good chunk of $$ on top of my pretty decent salary. To be honest, it seems like a lot of people have vehicles with insane car payments instead of just buying a car that is affordable (sorry — but, that’s where I see a lot of my friend’s money going when who are struggling financially).

Avatar

My fiancés is a construction worker, anything inside and outside a house he does. I’m a sahm with a three year old boy and a nine year old girl. We rent a house and have tons of bills. We can usually afford everything but his checks come in when the job is done so for example, we’ve been waiting three weeks for a check and currently behind 😅 but when the check comes in we get everything back on track.

Avatar

My husband is an air quality manager in oil and gas. We cut back and budgeted and made it a priority to pay off our vehicles while I was pregnant. That opened up funds for me to be able to leave my job after maternity leave.

Avatar

33 weeks pregnant. Had to stay home since 9 weeks.
My husband works as a chef in restaurants, 14year career. So he is a higher paid employee at his restaurant making $25 a hour.
When he’s working his full 40 it’s okay, but it’s been slow the last 4 months. So we are currently struggling and have had to rely on our credit cards.
But when his hours are good he’s making roughly $3500 a month and our bills run about $3300 a month.

I honestly use rocket money budgeting app, I pay $6 for premium and it helps me see our bills and spending. It helps me tweak our budget as needed.

Avatar

Under $80,000 in Denver metro and three young kids. I’ve stayed home for 8 years. We have a beautiful life and have been able to give our kids all the cool things (trampoline, water table, sandbox, swing set, etc). You just have to make it work if you really want to be with your kids - like having bananas and oatmeal for breakfast because they’re affordable… We pay over $400/mo in student loans though and own our cars.

Avatar

My husband is a disabled veteran who works full time as a heavy duty specialty diesel mechanic/welder $36hr, mortgage is over $2800, we have one toddler and I am due in 7 weeks. He's paid weekly and does get overtime plus monthly VA disability check. Health insurance for myself and the kids we pay for via his job, no medicaid, no wic. We both occasionally will do side jobs like mechanic work or pet/child care. Two vehicles, one paid off. We are blessed. This time last year we were struggling to pay everything because my husband was injured on the job. Now we are paying the bills and are able to focus a good bit on our debt, eat out/fun coffee twice a week, 3 dogs, 2 cats 12 chickens. I manage the budget and pay the bills.

Avatar

My husband is an electrician by trait and works in a managment role now in the oil field. We have two kids

Avatar

Back when I became a SAHM, we made it work because the cost of childcare outweighed what I was making as an esthetician. We also chose to rent vs buy so our monthly amount was much lower. We then used extra income down the road for different business ventures. Almost 7 years later, I'm still a SAHM (i do have side businesses but not consistent) and my husband's income has grown since 2019 :) I love the saying "when there's a will, there's a way" and also believe in manifesting positive outcomes!

Avatar

My husband does construction building backsplashes, counter tops and out door kitchens with granite. Our mortgage is 1800 electric is 300 a month, water is 90, gas is 25, trash is 75 every 3 months, card payment and credit cards i have 1 8 month old at home

Avatar

My husband is currently an apprentice to be an electrician. We are low income and get SNAP WIC and Medicaid. We own our house so we don’t pay rent… anyways are budget is really tight but it’s worth it!

Our budget
My husband brings home 3,000
+450 SNAP
(I like to nanny for extra money)
1500 Morgage this included insurance and property tax
100 water
200 electric
40 trash
100 propane
200 car insurance
50 security system
150 phones bills
200 gas
300 groceries (not food)
20 Spotify
120 for date night twice a month
The rest floats around
We are blessed to have a supportive family! We piggies back off of there streaming services! My grandma pays for a children’s museum membership! Mostly everything we own is hand me down, thrifted, or found on the side of the rode.

Avatar

As a Financial Advisor and single parent the best thing you can do as a SAHM is know your budget and what is important goal wise. Goals like saving, paying off debt, kids college, retirement etc. 💕

Read more on Peanut

Trending

in our community

Partners and resentment / postpartum rage - what is the division of labour everyone doing and how are you coping ?

My partner works fully remotely yet does only 1-2 hours of childcare a day and sleeps in a separate room. I think he’s not doing enough but what’s your routine / schedules like ?

We have been sleeping in separate bedrooms since I was about 34 weeks pregnant. Now our baby is 3.5 months old we’ve sort of carried it on. Initially I was ok with this as I was recovering from a c section but I’m getting resentful I do every single night feed/change/bottle run with baby and hoping him being in the room means he does some and becomes part of this experience too. She still has 3 feeds a night, I don’t co sleep and she’s combi fed so it’s not like it’s all on me BF. When our baby was born my partner did three weeks of the night shifts with the baby before returning to work so he’s very bonded with her and capable.

I’ve repeatedly asked him when he’s coming back into the bedroom and he’s made a million excuses, ‘it’s too hot, he needs his sleep because he’s working etc…
And I’ve also asked him to do just bedtime or any overnight support - even on weekends he doesn’t, he will on a Sunday or Saturday take the baby ‘early’ from 8am so I can have a lie in. But he refuses any other night engagement and so doesn’t see or touch the baby between 6.30pm - 9.30am. The few times we have shared a bed he’s not stirred at all in the night when she’s crying next to us. It feels intentional because how can he just sleep through it?!

On the otherside of the coin he does 50% of bathtimes, occasionally takes baby out for a few hours so I can rest or relax, does dinner 90% of the time, orders all the formula and nappies, does the food shop, does most of the laundry, pays for all bills and the house (which is in his name anyway). But I have the baby a solid 22/23 hours a day and he genuinely says well you’re on holiday you’re not working. He has quite a traditional belief system so sees his role as provider not caregiver which drives me nuts as I’d rather equality not division.

What’s more frustrating is that I know his job isn’t that demanding at the moment because he goes 2hr daily gym sessions during his work day as well as all day drinks with colleagues and friends. I feel like I have to ask permission to go to the dentist or have a haircut when he’s just booking lad trips away or nights out left right and centre.

Ultimately I feel like we are living two separate realities under the same roof.

Is this how it is for everyone else on mat leave ? How are we dealing with our partners, managing rage and becoming a default parent ? Am I expecting too much - is this just what motherhood is?

Avatar

3

8

EBF - healthy snacks

Waking up multiple times in the night to feed my little one and I end up eating biscuits or chocolate whilst feeding

Any healthy snack suggestions which would be easy for me to eat with one hand? (No nut suggestions)

Avatar

4

Having fever before birthday

My son decided to have a high fever and it’s a few days to his birthday is this normal or I should be worried ? I noticed he’s fourth teeth is popping out

Avatar

6

Spending time with baby.

Hi mamas, I have recently been accepted into Nursing school & while I am so excited I can’t help but feel like such a bad mommy. I am a single mom by choice, I adopted my son when he was 2 months old, so it’s always been just me & him! I work Monday - Friday 8 am - 5 pm where he is at daycare all day & then now that I am starting school I signed up for evening classes which will also be Monday - Friday 6 pm - 10 pm. By the time I get home he will be sleeping & I will really only get to hangout with him on the weekends. It is a year program so he will turn 2 in January & when I graduate he will be 1 month away from turning 3. I cannot help but feel like i will be missing so much of my sweet baby. Should I continue school now or wait until he’s older & can understand? I’m just so torn & feel like he won’t remember me or will think i abandoned him🥺

Avatar

3

Starting solids?

My baby will be 6 months next Sunday, he sits unaided, has good coordination and I’ve tried a a little spoon of banana and he can swallow. He really wants to eat and when I gave the banana he was so excited when eating it and grabbed my hand to have some more. But asking chat gpt, it still says to wait exactly at 6 months. What should I do? Does 12 days really make a difference?

Avatar

10

Men are lame

Do recently I joined two different Bible studies and I try to work on them throughout the week especially when my fiance is homeso he could sit with her if shes fussy and stuff like that yesterday i tried doing that maybe 5 minutes in he walks into the living room and says “shes being fussy and i donr know why
So i go in the room and change her diaper then go back to the living room maybe a minute later he comes back out and lays the baby down and says he has to go to the bathroom maybe half an hour later he comes back out of the bathroom and at this point ive givenup on doing my bible study work he walks right past me not even trying to take the baby back a little while later I tried to have a conversation with him and basically say lole how can i eventually go back to school or anything like that if when your home you cant even waych her for an hour so i can do a bible study he told me he doesn’t wanna spend his fays off watching a baby and he wants to do things he likes on his days off what do i do

Avatar

3

Read more on Peanut