Holidays and boundaries!

How did you guys make boundaries between your little families and both yours and your partners families? My husband and I both have divorced families and holidays have always been extremely difficult/busy because of it. Now that our little one is here and coming up on her first “big holiday” Easter I’ve got families pulling us in both directions. It would be so much easier if my baby could engage in the holiday as she’s only 7weeks old😂 if she was older we could do and start our own traditions here at home but since she’s so little everyone expects us to come to them still. Background context my husband and I have been together total 4 years married 1 1/2 so this is still very new for us.

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I mean your baby is still so young. Maybe you could say exactly that. "Due to baby being so young, we are staying home for the holiday. Feel free to stop by on these days and times, just give us a heads up!"

Girl!!! I’m still fighting! His family is so amazing about it! But mine-.- we are Eastern European so theres that. Everyone wants to hold her, everyone’s kids want to hold her. And no matter how much I tell them they just get butt hurt and still keep doing their their thing! Like this weekend I’m going to my sisters 50th birthday party and omg there will be 11 children under 10 and like 15 adults and I think imma loose it on them cause I already know whats coming

She is your child, and she is now your priority to protect, so always put her and your mental sanity first. She is so young, no immune system, and head is still wobbly, you don't want her being passed around, or getting sick. So just tell them you will see them at the next holiday and that right now she is too small to be with so many others (especially if there are school age kids there as well).

If you still want to go, then, do whichever feels best for you, where you know you will be given the space you need to take care of her!

I too come from a divorced family and my husband and I have very large families so I completely understand holidays being chaotic. Prior to having a child, we used to split some days where we would do 2 gatherings in one day which was A LOT and made for a long day. Since having our son, the commute is way too much for him to be doing that so what we started doing is doing one family per day per holiday. If two families were hosting on the same day, we would pick one & plan to attend the other family for the next holiday. So for example, we did my husband’s family at Christmas and we will be doing my family for Easter. I hope this makes sense!

I’m the stern one on all fronts. Me and my partner made it a point that I handle my side of the family he handles his. However I had to rip a few heads off on his side myself.. ANYWAYS just be clear about boundaries if you don’t want them being held let it be know “we’re not ready for people to hold her just yet” or you guys can be subtle and just baby wear her.
We have a rule - if people want to hold her just ask, the worst we can say is no.
People haven’t really held her and now she’s 1 🤷‍♀️

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My in laws hate me

I had a falling out with my MIl earlier in the week and I’ve now discovered some horrible messages sent from her to my husband following this. Along the lines of that I’m controlling and that I’m from a broken home (I’m not) and that my previous mental health issues (an eating disorder that I’m 8 years recovered from) make me a certain way. She’s warned him to be careful of me. I’m so hurt, upset and angry. I can’t tell him that I’ve seen them but I don’t know what to do. We’ve been together 4 years and coming up to our first wedding anniversary with a 10 month old. The damage is done and I’ll never want anymore to do with them but how can we move forward when it is this broken and damaged. If his family now hate me. I’ve had a really tough week with my baby teething and I just want to walk out the front door and run away

Am I being too sensitive?

It’s my birthday today. My husband reassured me he would let his work know in advance he needed to be working locally so he could be home at a decent time for my birthday. The plan was a day to myself & then go out for dinner with my husband.

He now isn’t due to be home until around 8pm due to working 2.5hrs away. This is all because he didn’t inform work he needed to be home at a reasonable hour, despite me reminding him multiple times this week.

I’m now unable to book my favourite restaurant in case he experiences travel delays (my anxiety means I have to always book just in case). I know this isn’t a huge issue, but I’m pregnant & I’m craving food from this particular restaurant so much (and I’ve had BAD food aversions to a lot of food)!!

I also told him I’m upset because I’m going to be alone all evening. He said I should see my friends, but I don’t have the energy to. My friends also don’t know I’m pregnant yet as we’re waiting until our 12 week scan tomorrow…so being around them would be impossible when I’m feeling rubbish!

I’ve been alone all day (which doesn’t bother me), but being alone basically most of the evening too just makes me feel rubbish. It’s even more annoying because it was completely preventable. My husband has apologised and said he didn’t think working where he was working today was going to cause problems, but I’m just mad he didn’t initially listen and speak to his office out of precaution.

Am I overreacting (maybe from pregnancy hormones lol) or would this annoy you too?

1 month old - what should we be doing daily?

My son is about 4.5 weeks old. Most days he just sleeps on my chest most of the day, which I am okay with but I don't want to miss out on anything we should be doing. My son gets overwhelmed very easily so we usually do one "activity" a day max right now (such as bath, long walk, or having visitors). We do tummy time at least every other day, try to do every day. I read to him, sing to him, and of course talk to him. Is there anything else ya'll are doing with your LOs?

Leaving the house

Hey! Would love some advice.

I am almost 8 weeks postpartum, and had a tricky delivery, being in and out the hospital for the first 3 weeks (due retained placenta after my c section- hospital f-up, and issues with shortness of breath- which was investigated and anything serious was ruled out)

My husband has been back at work since week 4 and i have not left the house. I won’t leave unless he or someone is with me. Not even for a short walk. I have been out for appointments, but always with someone.

There isn’t much to do locally and it’s not a very nice area to go for a walk in.

I have friends with babies slightly older who want to meet up outside, but that would mean driving and finding a place i feel comfortable unloading baby from the car and having somewhere i can comfortably breastfeed.

I honestly don’t know if this is normal or if i should be pushing myself more.

Can you love being mum and at the same time cry because it’s difficult and you’re tired of it?

I’m trying to explain this to my husband but I don’t know how. I am crying all the time because It’s exhausting but I really love being my little ones mum. Can the two coexist or am I just an emotional mess?

Do you think cursive is important for your kids to learn?

In a world where everything is in printed letters now, cursive is going more and more out of style in schools. Im 30 and i only had 2 weeks of cursive my entire school career back then. I feel like cursive is important because i hate the idea of having to use a translation to read historical documents like the US Constitution or the Magna Carta. I want my kid to be able to read the documents as written instead of trusting a translation that could have wording changed or is just a summary.