Disconnected from partner

Anyone bed sharing that feels a little disconnected from their partner? We’ve bed shared for the last 7 months from birth and for the past month my partner has been sleeping in the spare room as the beds becoming cramped.

I also go to bed when my daughter does 1. Because I feed to sleep and stay with her till she’s settled 2. I am so zapped by this time in the evenings all I want to do if lay in a dark room and 3. I have no idea what the night will hold so quite like getting as much sleep as possible, would hate to go to bed at 11 and then be awake multiple times

I just feel like we’re not getting much time together, I can’t remember the last time we snuggled or watched a programme together 😕 let alone intimacy😬 I just keep telling myself this is a season. we’ve been together 11 years and I know we’re good I just wondered if anyone else is in a similar boat or is this unhealthy?

Read more on Peanut

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.

Learn more about our guidelines.

Add a comment

Sorry for the lengthy post!! I should add I do mentioned whether we need change to my partner and he is super supportive in riding things out and making it as comfortable for me and our baby as possible!

We got a super king bed (UK size) when we knew we'd be cosleeping for a long time so we can all stay together. Are you working? If I plan to sneak back out of bed to be with my husband I'll nap with my little one in the afternoon so I have energy to have some time with him in the evening. Our little one is now 21 months and we've had phases of spending a lot of time together and phases of none at all. Also we find ways to connect where little one can be with us, one of us wears the baby carrier and we will go on walks together & she's happy so we can have nice convos, or we cook together, clean together etc. hope some of those ideas help 🩷

I worry about this too, baby is 3 months today. I want to be able to get her to nap in her crib so that we can have some time together. I also want to maybe start the night in the bassinet again, but I too cannot imagine staying up late when I’m so beat by night time… my goal with the bassinet would be to see if I could get a stretch of sleep longer than 2-3 hours.

My husband is basically doing no baby duty at this point and I just feed her on demand in bed and otherwise, so he is not missing out on any sleep, so he can stay up.

My little boy is 15months and we have slept in a seperate bed since he was 4months. I feel like i could have written your post myself. I also go to bed with my LO for those reasons. Ive resigned to be here until his sleep improves and is more predictable (my guess is 18-24 months) because my relationship can withstand the distance. My sanity cannot withstand the lack of sleep and rest 🤷‍♀️
Do what you need to for now i say, it wont be forever x

in our community

shower infront of children

Is it weird to shower infront of your children, or your children see you naked?
At what age should this stop?

I’m just looking at what everyone’s thoughts are as I have a 7 month old and at the moment it’s hard for me to shower without him getting upset.

We contact nap atm, otherwise I'd shower when he sleeps!

It’s easier to bring his play mat into the bathroom whilst I shower so i can at least wash, else i have to wait for my husband to arrive home at 5/6pm.

Keen to see what people's opinions are and how other people do this!

Milk Supply

Hello,
I am 4 months pp and i originally wasn’t going to breastfeed as it is not something i wanted to do however after my baby was born with time i did regret it so i reached out to a breastfeeding consultant and they are currently trying to help me up my supply.I was wondering if you had any tips for upping supply and what worked for you.I’d appreciate any advice,thank you!

GIRL DADS TAKING DAUGHTER TO BATHROOM IN PUBLIC

If a girl dad needs to take his daughter to the bathroom in public and there are no family bathrooms … I swear video online of a dad saying he uses the women’s bathroom but always knocks and announces ‘girl dad helping my daughter go to the bathroom’ and I love that idea and mens rooms are disgusting but wanted to see everyone’s thoughts

Normal breathing for Newborn?

Is this normal? I’m FTM very worried. Just need reassurance or advice.

Dummies

What’s everyone’s views on dummies? Are you planning to use them and if so at what age ? I am breastfeeding and my midwife said to avoid them as it might effect feeding but baby is feeding really well now and he has now found his thumb to suck for comfort ! I would prefer him to use a sterilised dummy than his hands that might carry germs but he is only 3.5 weeks not sure if it’s too early ?

Ebf bottle refusal

I want to introduce a bottle so my partner and mum can feed baby every so often but she hates it! Have tried breast milk and formula and am using mam bottles. She also isn’t a fan of dummies. Goal is to give her formula as I hate pumping!