Am I being paranoid or gaslit?
I feel like I am being constantly gaslit by my husband over things that to me, should be common sense, but to him I’m “being dramatic” and “he won’t do that”
For example our son has just started crawling, we already have a baby gate at the top of the stairs but I want one for the bathroom door too because the actual door we have doesn’t shut properly and I don’t want him going in there and playing with the toilet brush and stuff like that, my husband said I was being stupid and “why would he do that he’s not stupid” and he thinks we should only have a gate at the top of the stairs and that’s it and any more I’m being obsessive about them, I also want one over the kitchen and bottom of stairs but again apparently that’s too much!
Another example I told him he has to turn his extension lead off at the wall now baby is crawling because I don’t want him to chew the phone charger or play with the sockets etc, he told me I was being ridiculous and “nothing will happen to him stop being paranoid”
Earlier I caught him texting while he was bathing our son and I said he needs to keep his hands and eyes on him at all times in the bath and he told me I was being paranoid again.
There’s been a few other digs here and there but these are the most recent ones. It’s making me worry when I have to leave my baby with him incase he’s not taking his safety seriously like why isn’t he thinking of all the potential dangers the way that I do all the time?
I have post partum anxiety which he knows about and sometimes I think he uses this against me.
The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.
Learn more about our guidelines.
Your husband needs to wake up. Bottom of the stair gates are a must. My 9 month old climbs the stairs. She also pulls things out of the outlets and chews them. Her most recent was the CO monitor. I've also caught her chewing the end of chargers.
As for the bath, remind him that drowning is the leading cause of death under 5.
I can't remember the exact percentage of those drownings happen at home, but it's really high. (Been working in aquatics for 20yrs). Tell him that drowning is silent and if he's not paying attention, it will be too late if something happens. Also the water only needs to be deep enough to cover their mouth and nose for them to drown (less than 5 cm or 2 in).
The toilet brush is usually a toddler concern, but if you have a cupboard under the sink or in the hall you can just leave it in there.
All of those are perfectly logical concerns to me. Babies find and put the most random shit in their mouths all the time. Bottom of the stairs is definitely a must, if they climb them they can fall down just as easily as they could if you didn't have one at the top of the stairs. Kitchen cupboards either need locking or you need a baby gate that's common sense. Your husband sounds wayyyyyy to lax to be caring for a baby.
Download the Peanut App
