Overheard my husband and his brother discussing their next trip to forbidden planet… and he tells him he plans on bringing our 1 year old along. Now I don’t know a whole lot about it but from what he’s explained before it’s a fiction/ fantasy comic/ book/ toy store. He’s always said it’s packed and he is in there for ages. Not sure why they’d think that’s a fun thing for a 1 year old to be dragged to, as well as the fact that our child has never been exposed to any cartoons, screens, fiction books etc and won’t be any time soon. She would have no clue what she’s doing there and will get bored quick.
I’ve spoken to him before about pushing his interests onto our children, understandable when it’s sharing a toy or short book or pictures that seems normal, however I’ve had to address him in the past regarding purchasing silly items to only take a quick picture or video of child with it and share it with his family making out that our child is interested in or even sometimes obsessed with them just because she’s holding them and looking at it (what kid wouldn’t 🙄). He’s been doing this kinda thing since she was a baby, she’ll crawl and he’d record her crawling to one of his toys and plaster it on his family group about how much she likes the toy now… as if she had a choice in the matter when it’s purposely put in front of her while all other toys removed, y know? I know he thinks I’m being extra but I’m an educator, I value teaching children and babies to explore appropriately, fostering their interests and following their lead. I feel my husband just wants her to be dragged into such places or ideas so he can be performative, and from my observation he only bonds with his siblings over avengers, Pokémon etc etc because they were glued to the TV and YouTube as kids and still are. I feel strongly about exposing her to these things at such an early age but I don’t think he understands. I totally get wanting to share your interests with your child but I mean just because I love makeup, I’m not about to show my child tutorials and get her a kit. I want him to notice what she loves doing, and work with that. Not just what brings him pleasure. His style does not feel natural or appropriate to me.
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I mean….. If you feel it’s not natural and an act then sure, yes, it’s weird and “your child is not a billboard for your interests” comes to mind.
But I also know my husband acts the same way with spaghetti westerns and baseball. I think….. I think it’s a you have to know your guy and if he’s faking it and forcing it on her, eww. But if he’s genuinely trying to show her like Gwen pool because she’s a girl and he doesn’t know how to relate another way. Then give him the benefit of the doubt.

Seems totally normal to me. He likes the stuff and wants to show his kid. Maybe it is performative but I don’t see that as an issue either. Everyone is performative with some things. This is not hurting the kid.
I actually find it kind of cute

It's no different to other fathers who are into motorcycles, sports, gaming etc who show these interests to their kids.
It's actually pretty cool what he's doing and he genuinely loves his kid.

You’re mad because he wants to share his interests with your mutual child?

But it does benefit the relationship because he enjoys it and wants to show her. It benefits him. And by extension her because she gets to hang out with him and hear him talk about something he is passionate about.
It gives the same vibes as putting on the ugly outfit grandma bought and taking a picture to send her. And then taking the outfit off. Like yeah it’s maybe performative by it makes everyone happy.
Those are just my thoughts.

Its never too young to share something you love with your babies, I am sure hes excited 😊

I totally get that! It seems like a lot of times moms meet their babies on the kids level while dad's want their little buddies to be involved in what they are already doing. That's the case for my family at least. My husband always wants to hold the kid and talk to him about his video games while I am more the one who reads him kids books and plays with him with his toys

When my daughter was 2, I got her a set of spider-man plush toys. She had no idea what spider-man was and at the time, they meant nothing to her. I don't even especially like spider-man. But my husband is a comic nerd, and I knew he would enjoy it. They are now some of her favourite toys. She sleeps with each one every night. She especially loves her Spider-Gwen, takes her everywhere (we've had to get back-ups), and I don't think there was a prouder moment than when my daughter had to ask her daddy if Spider-Gwen can stick to walls the way spider-man can.
I get what you are saying about performativity, but sometimes it really is just about sharing interests, and they may seem silly to you, but they clearly mean a lot to him. It's a way to bond with his child, and maybe it's the way that works for him. It may not be your way but why does it have to change, if it makes them both happy?