Is this normal parent child bonding to you?

Overheard my husband and his brother discussing their next trip to forbidden planet… and he tells him he plans on bringing our 1 year old along. Now I don’t know a whole lot about it but from what he’s explained before it’s a fiction/ fantasy comic/ book/ toy store. He’s always said it’s packed and he is in there for ages. Not sure why they’d think that’s a fun thing for a 1 year old to be dragged to, as well as the fact that our child has never been exposed to any cartoons, screens, fiction books etc and won’t be any time soon. She would have no clue what she’s doing there and will get bored quick.
I’ve spoken to him before about pushing his interests onto our children, understandable when it’s sharing a toy or short book or pictures that seems normal, however I’ve had to address him in the past regarding purchasing silly items to only take a quick picture or video of child with it and share it with his family making out that our child is interested in or even sometimes obsessed with them just because she’s holding them and looking at it (what kid wouldn’t 🙄). He’s been doing this kinda thing since she was a baby, she’ll crawl and he’d record her crawling to one of his toys and plaster it on his family group about how much she likes the toy now… as if she had a choice in the matter when it’s purposely put in front of her while all other toys removed, y know? I know he thinks I’m being extra but I’m an educator, I value teaching children and babies to explore appropriately, fostering their interests and following their lead. I feel my husband just wants her to be dragged into such places or ideas so he can be performative, and from my observation he only bonds with his siblings over avengers, Pokémon etc etc because they were glued to the TV and YouTube as kids and still are. I feel strongly about exposing her to these things at such an early age but I don’t think he understands. I totally get wanting to share your interests with your child but I mean just because I love makeup, I’m not about to show my child tutorials and get her a kit. I want him to notice what she loves doing, and work with that. Not just what brings him pleasure. His style does not feel natural or appropriate to me.

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I mean….. If you feel it’s not natural and an act then sure, yes, it’s weird and “your child is not a billboard for your interests” comes to mind.
But I also know my husband acts the same way with spaghetti westerns and baseball. I think….. I think it’s a you have to know your guy and if he’s faking it and forcing it on her, eww. But if he’s genuinely trying to show her like Gwen pool because she’s a girl and he doesn’t know how to relate another way. Then give him the benefit of the doubt.

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Seems totally normal to me. He likes the stuff and wants to show his kid. Maybe it is performative but I don’t see that as an issue either. Everyone is performative with some things. This is not hurting the kid.

I actually find it kind of cute

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It's no different to other fathers who are into motorcycles, sports, gaming etc who show these interests to their kids.
It's actually pretty cool what he's doing and he genuinely loves his kid.

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You’re mad because he wants to share his interests with your mutual child?

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But it does benefit the relationship because he enjoys it and wants to show her. It benefits him. And by extension her because she gets to hang out with him and hear him talk about something he is passionate about.

It gives the same vibes as putting on the ugly outfit grandma bought and taking a picture to send her. And then taking the outfit off. Like yeah it’s maybe performative by it makes everyone happy.

Those are just my thoughts.

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Its never too young to share something you love with your babies, I am sure hes excited 😊

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I totally get that! It seems like a lot of times moms meet their babies on the kids level while dad's want their little buddies to be involved in what they are already doing. That's the case for my family at least. My husband always wants to hold the kid and talk to him about his video games while I am more the one who reads him kids books and plays with him with his toys

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When my daughter was 2, I got her a set of spider-man plush toys. She had no idea what spider-man was and at the time, they meant nothing to her. I don't even especially like spider-man. But my husband is a comic nerd, and I knew he would enjoy it. They are now some of her favourite toys. She sleeps with each one every night. She especially loves her Spider-Gwen, takes her everywhere (we've had to get back-ups), and I don't think there was a prouder moment than when my daughter had to ask her daddy if Spider-Gwen can stick to walls the way spider-man can.

I get what you are saying about performativity, but sometimes it really is just about sharing interests, and they may seem silly to you, but they clearly mean a lot to him. It's a way to bond with his child, and maybe it's the way that works for him. It may not be your way but why does it have to change, if it makes them both happy?

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Is this insanely overpriced? I posted on my local support group for parents of kids with disabilities asking about summer camps....

I got a message about a daycare that will be holding 3 different summer programs that run for 3 days in the last week of July for 450 dollars per child. 450 dollars for 3 days of "camp" seems like a rip off to me especially being for kids with disabilities???

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Going out

Where are you taking baby out atm while they are still just a few weeks old?

What age will you start taking them out properly e.g. to coffee shops, classes, theme parks (for older sibling), play dates, farm etc?

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I thought my first kid was hard but this one is horrendous. He complains or whines majority of the time. His sleep is ridiculous, even his naps are a joke. I am burnt out and miserable. I genuinely hate being a mum. Why I've done it twice I have no idea. I'm about ready to ram my head into a wall

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Overwhelmed…..

I’m so fucking overwhelmed and frustrated I’m done being a mom!!!! I get ZERO fuckin help from my husband. Only help I get is my mom and that’s if she comes get us. I don’t have a car. Can’t go for a walk. No park. No nothing but a 4yr and a 3month old in a two bed 1bath apt 24/7 365 being basically a single married mom!!!! I’m over it!!!!!!!

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Having a mental breakdown

My kids love chicken nuggets for lunch, im sure this is my fault because I dont like to spend my entire day cooking meals but thats beside the point. The great value dino nugget recall has me sick to my stomach terrified. I already have a fear of food and getting sick from food, then come to find out something weve all been eating was tested for potential super high lead levels freaks me out beyond belief. Not only for my kids but for myself too. I might be crazy but ive already called poison control, called their pediatrician, and scheduled a lead test blood draw for myself.
I feel like such a shit parent. I just want the best for my kids but I feel like im failing them in so many ways right now. I wish we could afford to get the best most healthiest organic food for them and I wish I had the time/energy to make them all their food scratch so I know what theyre taking in is good for them. With the prices of literally everything raising, how are we supposed to do this?
My entire body aches today from either a virus or a autoimmune flare up and then to find this out just has me feeling like shit in every way. I hate all of this.

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My husband and I agreed we had the fortunate opportunity to have me be a SAHM. Our finances are thankfully sound and we don’t have to worry!

Of course my MIL doesn’t know this we don’t speak about our finances to her bc we are doing better than 90% of the family and don’t want to rub it in anyone’s faces.

I don’t plan on working until our kids are grown right now we have our first kid 11 mo.

Every single time my mother in law is around without fail she brings up how I could work or bring in income. My husband has told her my job is mom and right now we aren’t looking for a job i am enjoying being a mom. I know it maybe my MIL insecurities but it’s very annoying to hear it feels like I am not doing “enough” as a SAHM alone.

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