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Baby Daddy Drama

Baby daddy problems. (I need help.)

My daughter, Anita. Her biological father has never been in the picture, from when I was 3 months pregnant, until thanksgiving in 2024. When he came back, on Christmas to see her for the first time, ever since that specific Christmas, he claims I haven't taught him anything, (my daughter had a G-Tube, from feeding slower than other babies. And was in the NICU for 74 days, I brought her home on Halloween of 2024.) when I taught him, diapers, food, her tube, (how to clean and change it) and even how to do her bottle correctly. He however refused to do the tube, bathe her, feed her, and even change her unless I was begging for it. (He only changes peed diapers that ik of rn.) Since January of 2025, him and I have been on and off the entire year, he really left near Christmas. He came back, and again would shame me for my mental health, even though he's in and out of her life, and even when we were together, it was me doing everything and anything for my child, (he wasn't in the delivery room either, he was in another state) my daughter was also born at 33 weeks, via C-section for my water breaking earlier than expected. We had a really massive talk, and I had explained, how it was always me, and she barely knows him, as he wouldn't do anything for her, and only really saw her when we were dating, and together, I also mentioned, everything I do for Anita, how he hasn't bothered checking in, and chooses another baby his gf had rather than his own, his response was "I didn't want to be a dad" and "it's better if she doesn't know me as her dad" (I do have the ss Incase he wants this to go to court) the thing is. He isn't on the birth certificate. Or even someone to call Incase of an emergency. I am playing both parents for her. He texted me the other night, saying he wanted to see her, or he'd take me to court. I decided this last chance, I've set boundaries for him and his gf (who's moving in) I have set I know the plans 24/7 if he cancels, and how I do NOT want his gf immediately in the picture, and I want him to have time to Anita for himself (12 days total) before they meet each other, (mind you, he rather drive 4 hours for his gf and her child for months, rather than his daughter who lives 15 minutes away from him. I guess I'm asking if I'm crazy for setting so many boundaries for her biological father, and his gf and her child, for my daughter's health, well being, and the way to feel loved equally? (His gf has threatened me before, and he has also done the same with calling CPS. Which idk why he would, other than the fact I have diabetes, and a heart condition that makes it difficult for me to work, and I stay at home,) (I also do get money for the government, which I've divided between my daughter and I, she gets spoiled like crazy, while I also get food, water, and gifts for her and dinner at restaurants.) Am I being a helicopter mom? A bad mom? Or a bad person in any type of way for what I have set (I didn't name all of them btw.) I have ss, and both his and his gfs chats saved, (his gf has also stalked my Instagram account, and put my bio into her story thinking it was about her which I'm sure is what started all of this, the bio wasn't about her, and was about my ex friend who cheated on her fiance.)

I'm currently debating on texting my daughter's father, and telling him I do NOT want him in Anitas life as this would be the 5th-6th chance I have given him, to no changes, no gifts, and him not feeding her by feeding himself, plus his family doesn't like me, call me names, and all of this, (plus him choosing another girl with a kid, who's 4 hours away, instead of seeing Anita who's 15 minutes away, asking questions, and rejects any call I have asked for him to make, so she can hear his voice. (This has been going on since before I was pregnant, since November of 2023.)