I need coparenting advice

Sorry it’s long!
So my son just turned 4 on the 7th and his father said that he wanted to do 80/20 custody so he gets him every over weekend last October, well since than instead of twice a month he’s been doing once a month, he missed Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, new years, Easter, and last but not least his birthday. For any of these days he never called texted or anything. My last straw was for his birthday because he texted me two days after saying “I feel bad can you tell him sorry” not hey can I call him for a little or anything and then tells me he forgot about his birthday because he got busy with his girlfriend that they’re going through it and he was busy planning his birthday party that was this weekend. Anyway beside that when he does actually come get him he’s always late and always complaining, example this was his weekend he picked him up he didn’t come Friday like he said because he needed to decorate? And then asked me if I could drive him over there and when I told him no because my plates are expired and it’s an hour and a half drive he got mad and said he’d pick him up at 7am on Saturday. I told him no way and I’m going to wake up the early he should planned accordingly because he’s been planning this party for months anyway I told him 9 is the earliest and he kept pushing 7 well he ended up getting to my house at 11😒 and now today he’s supposed to bring him back because he has preschool tomorrow and he said he’d bring him back at 7pm but I didn’t hear from him all day so I asked what time will he be here and then he says 9 and I’m like that’s past his bedtime and he has school that’s way to late! ANYWAYYY I have no idea how to deal with this frustration he’s so unreliable and inconsistent and I don’t even want to send my son to deal with it but I can’t bring myself to actually do it. I’ve tried talking and explaining myself but it’s like talking to a wall. I’d appreciate any advice!

in our community

Pls help with this!

My baby has been having this on his gum for weeks now and the gp said it’s nothing but I’m so worried.
Has ever come across this before? I’m soo worried. Not sure if it’s affecting his feeding.. but he eats ok.

Disobedient Husband

Hi, throughout duration of my pregnancy the husband has been rude and inconsiderate. He has forgotten my birthday and our anniversary.

I’m not sure if obedience school is an option at this age because he is 40 now and beyond the point of training age.

Any tips or helpful tricks to mediate his autonomy at this time ?

Overwhelmed mama

Hey all,

This is just a rant I apologise in advance and I’m posting anonymously because I’m carrying so much shame for this but I need to say it out loud… being a mama is tough!!!!

Doing it solo since my LO was 6 weeks old and I’ve got so many positives happening right now, a new home I’m decorating and getting ready to move into with my little boy, life should feel lighter. But the to do list, with an 8, almost 9 month old who’s been battling a cold for a week, sleepless nights, grumpy days, I’m burnt out.

I’ve tried talking to my own mum but she questions how I’m going to cope being on my own with him (we are currently at my parents) and when I try to talk to her when I get a little overwhelmed, she responds in ways that highlight why I shouldn’t be struggling and it makes me shut down and say less.

Please tell me I’m not alone having hard days? I’m like a bottle of pop constantly being shook with nowhere to put it, so I’m posting this on here whilst crying on the toilet. 🤦🏼‍♀️

Please be gentle.

Behaviour

I have a 5 year old daughter and her attitude and behaviour is so bad lately is that normal

Questions for SAHM

Are you guys genuinely giving your baby your undivided attention all day?? My baby is fine with independent play on his mat so often times I let him just play (obviously I’m nearby paying attention) but if he’s not crying I just let him be. I use this time to clean whatever room I’m in or just relax for a second. Is that bad?? For 5 months he’s where he should be milestone wise I think. Rolling both ways, rocking back and forth getting ready to crawl, sits up mostly unsupported.. I just feel guilty like should I be playing with him all day?? Or is independent play a good skill to have?? And yes I do play with him, and if he’s crying I pick him up and comfort him and play with him in my lap.

Upset

So my bf has told me "you've let yourself go" and "im not attracted to you " I had my baby 5 months ago. I do everything on my own (hes gone 5 days a week) I have no family here. When hes home he doesnt do much. My baby doesnt take a bottle so I cant even go to the nail salon. I am a stay at home mom. Im starting up my business with a 5 month old. And my bd just sent me a photo of me when I was prepragancy..... he didmt say anything just sent a mirror butt selfie I had taken. Im upset. I was 196 when I got pregnant and im down to 217. I cant count calories due to breast feeding and I've just expressed that for the last 4 months I've had the baby blues. Like how you yall feel?