I don’t like my toddler.
My little one was a easy baby. So loving. Even entering toddlerhood the big feelings moments were not nearly as horrible as they are now. She listens well and we hardly have to repeat ourselves until she says okay mommy or daddy. This past week her behavior has been horrible. She is giving me nasty looks when I am smiling at her. She crosses her arms at me. She screams at the top of her lungs saying go away, leave me alone, no, etc. We have her in preschool half time and her teachers have no complaints, she is always very passive and friendly. To top it off, she hits me so much. She will dig her nails into my arms and swing her arms and hit me. She will also use her head to try to hit me when I hold her arms at her side to try to stop the hitting. We never spank her back and we are firm with her on timeouts but even that she will fight so hard whereas before she would go and sit down on timeout no issues. She is turning 3 in the summer. I’m at a loss as to why she is acting so out of the ordinary. I want to chalk it up to be developmentally normal but there are zero sweet moments with her now. Even when she sits with me she will look at me and clench her jaw and push her head really hard into me or only want her dad. I just want to cry cuz I feel guilty for feeling like I don’t like her at all. I’ll always love her but it’s like the sweet kind cuddly girl she was has been possessed by this feral mean abusive toddler. Please help me, am I alone in this? Are there any other moms going through this because for some reason when I talk about this with other moms they are all shocked that she knows to hit and thinking that we showed her the hitting. Why the hell would I expose her to hitting?! I only have one mom friend who said her child also hits and it was not like she was taught that, kids just do that right? I’m at a loss.
Stranger Danger conversation with littles
Hi moms, I want to start a discussion about stranger danger based on something that happened yesterday.
I’m still on maternity leave, and on Wednesdays my husband works late, so every week I take my (almost) 5yo son and 11.5wk old daughter to the park before dinner (usually 6-7pm). We eat dinner later on Wednesdays so we can eat with my husband who usually gets home at 7:30. Yesterday, there was another kid there (he told my son he was 8yo) playing completely alone, no adult was with him the entire time. Him and my son played together while I sat close by with my daughter. I was close enough to see him at all times but couldn’t always hear what they were talking about.
When it was time to leave, the boy started following us home. It was about a 15 minute walk back to our house. He kept asking my son where we live and which house was ours. We live in a large townhome community (500+ townhomes). After a bit and before we got to our block our house was on, I told him it was time for him to head home.
As we walked away, my son told me the boy kept asking him those same questions at the park, plus things like when his dad would be home, does he stay home by himself sometimes and if we have a door camera. My son (completely innocent) told him to follow us so he could show him where we live, that his dad works late on Wednesdays and that our door camera is dead (earlier that day i was on the phone with my husband talking about ordering a new charger for the ring camera bc it had died and wasn’t charging, i assume that’s why my son said the door camera was dead)
I’m sure it was completely innocent, and part of me feels like I might be overreacting, but something about it didn’t sit right with me. So I asked if he knew the boy’s name, and he said no and that the boy wouldn’t tell him, which also felt a little strange.
It definitely made me raise an eyebrow and has me thinking more about having a serious, age appropriate conversation with my son about stranger danger and sharing too much personal information.
How are you or would you approach the conversation about stranger danger with your 4-5 year olds? What would you say and how do you keep it clear but age appropriate?
Would really appreciate an honest & open discussion about this. TIA🤍
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