I just need a bit of a rant about how I’m feeling and to see if anyone else has gone through something similar 🤷🏼♀️
So I think I might have PPD… I’ve already spoken to my health visitor, but she thinks it’s just anxiety (she’s… an interesting person).
Anyway, my little one is nearly 8 weeks old. She’s a very fussy baby and still only sleeps on us, so we’re doing shifts through the night.
I feel so angry all the time and get annoyed so easily. Then I feel guilty because I don’t want my baby to only see me like this. Everything irritates me, even my husband, which makes me really sad because I adore him and love him so much… but lately he just gets on my nerves.
I also feel completely stuck on the sofa all day. I’m either in my pyjamas or I change into a tracksuit, and I just feel so unattractive at the moment. My hair, my skin… I feel like I look like a mess. All my clothes feel ugly too — mostly maternity or baggy stuff.
On top of that, I feel like my house is constantly a mess. I just want it to be clean, organised, and smell nice 😫
We don’t have anyone around as our parents and relatives live in other countries, and I also have to deal with a difficult mother-in-law and a jealous sister-in-law.
I love my daughter so much — I cant teel how much she means to me, and I’m sure you all know that feeling. But I’m just so overwhelmed and angry, and sometimes I feel like I hate everyone and don’t want anyone around
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Hey Vivien, sorry to hear you are feeling like this. How much solid sleep would you say you are getting each night?

Im exactly the same, my daughter is 8 weeks old too and I’ve split up with her father as i cannot stand the sight of him and he only see his daughter for maybe an hour alternate weeks because he’s got “his own things to do”, I’m getting that angry and irritated I’ve now got high blood pressure. Everything and everyone irritates me and this past week I’ve now started getting irritated at people holding my baby because she is now crying unless shes on me i just take her back constantly. But on the other hand I’m so exhausted because of my emotions and doing everything on my own which own be helping my emotions. My health visitor also said it was anxiety and got me to make a doctors appointment to be put on medication 🤦🏻♀️x

Look up the safe sleep 7 to see if co sleeping may be an option for you, if you haven't already.
Have you experimented with different kinds of swaddles? My son wouldnt sleep in his next to me and I realised it was because he hated the swaddles I was using, which pinned his arms down. I switched to a love2dream swaddle bag (which pins his arms up) and the difference was immediate and he will now only do long stretches if wearing that. Then the usual advice re a dark room, white noise, etc to see if that helps you to get more sleep.
My other bit of advice is just to give yourself some grace. What you are experiencing is so common, please dont beat yourself up for it or feel guilty. We are all doing our best and you are your baby's entire world, but you are allowed to find this hard (and show it) x

Im on week 10 and she didnt sleep either, I gave in and ended up bedsharing with her while my partner carried on bedsharing with our first, the difference having abit more sleep can make is unbelievable, I cried all the time. The health visitor and the modwifes were convinced I had ppd, i possibly do, but it was more the complete change to routine i experienced and the guilt I felt to oldest as shes only 2. I did sign up for talking therapies to do cbt which you can self refer to online if you think that might help. I was also told they are doing a postpartum course at the moment aswell but it did seem more aimed at new mothers. I also finally got my newborn to go in a baby wrap so I can do the occasional job around the house, she doesnt tolerate it all the time but its small victories that make the difference at this stage. Its still so early.

Aw bless what your feeling I felt It aswell in the first few weeks I had a c section so I couldn't change her nappy or anything but when she cried etc I just wanted to scream and felt irritated as to why it was almost happening even tho she was just being a baby I love her and her dad to bits but I almost couldn't stand myself and would often cry as to why I was like that etc I didn't have the sleep deprivation like that as she sleeps ok but I can imagine with that on top as well as routine change etc it's all new I used to say I don't know who Lauryn is anymore etc I'm just getting there now and she's 10wks tomorrow , I'm the same with clothes to as I'm having to wear loose clothes etc at the moment but storms don't last forever lovely we have got this your doing amazing and if you need to talk at anytime pop me a message xx