Advice

Hey ladies so my 6 year old having some behavior issues at school . He has adhd but high functioning and he’s speech delayed . He does his school work but for some reason he just feels the need to hit and kick or run from his teacher or whom ever is helping but he’s does really well with the staff in the office and sometimes does well with his teacher when doing one on one . He picks and choose who he behavior with . I try to explain to this him at home I feel that something’s he understand and some things he’s not fully understanding.

in our community

Out of wedlock kids

Am I the only one that feels some type of way about giving my kids my partners last name out of wedlock? I’m pretty traditional as far as needing to be married to make a last name my partners. I just don’t feel right about not sharing a last name with my partner and then my children having his last name without marriage. My first son has my last name, my partner wasn’t happy about it when it happened and now I’m more than halfway pregnant with my second baby and I plan on giving her my last name as well. A part of me does feel bad because I feel like it is unfair to him, but also a part of me doesn’t sit right with knowing me and him don’t share a last name to begin with. I feel like he’ll be upset this time around as well but I’ve already expressed it multiple times that until there’s marriage I just don’t feel comfortable with my children having his last name when I don’t even have it. I don’t even feel right about having two kids with a man and not having his last name. Anyways a part of me feels like he just doesn’t even wanna marry me and that’s a big reason as to why I wouldn’t give them his last name to begin with. I just don’t feel hopeful about it being in the future or in the cards for us. I just feel like it’s not something that’s that important to him and it’s very important to me and we just don’t see eye to eye with marriage. We’ve only been together four years, anytime he has talked about it. It’s like a future future thing. I’m expressed that it doesn’t have to be anything expensive it’s just the principle in my beliefs that would make me feel more secure and loved. I know a lot of people might disagree and they do it for their partner anyways but for future reference, I just don’t wanna have to deal with any of my children having his last name when I don’t have his last name and anything could happen in the future as far as splitting up, and I’m not trying to deal with my children having his last name when they are children out of wedlock to begin with. I’m not an extremely religious person or anything, but my traditional beliefs as far as marriage are pretty stern and I just see myself being a woman that is married with children so I already having two children and not being married kind of feels like I failed in a sense. It’s starting to become a dealbreaker for me. I know I probably sound a little impatient, but two kids in 2 years happened really quickly and I feel like that’s much more of a commitment than marriage is. I’m not an extravagant woman that needs a $2000 ring or a big wedding or anything. It’s just a principle of the last name that changes a lot of things for me.

Am I the crazy one

So my husband emotionally cheated (sexted a friend of his who is a girl and it went on for just over a month)I found out about it and confronted him. He admitted it, apologized, and said he’d work to earn my trust back. Well last night I found out he was talking to an old ex of his from years ago and called her beautiful and asked why she hadnt become a model and said he must have a thing for nurses (she was a nurse and I’m a new nurse). I told him it bothered me that he called her beautiful. He says he’s doing nothing wrong. He’s also asked another female friend why he was only in the friend zone with her.

He told me I need to talk to someone about MY insecurities.

I told him I just don’t understand why he needs to text these women and have these types of conversation conversations with them. I told him if he just simply talked to them it would be one thing. I told him I was fine until I found out about the sexting. I also told him he said he’d work at earning my trust back but how am I supposed to trust him when he’s texting multiple women calling them beautiful.

We had mentioned getting divorced, but I told him I would rather try and work through our problems then have to put our kids through that. He said he was up for talking to a marriage counselor so I am working on that now, but haven’t been able to do anything about it for the last month because we lost our health insurance for a month because he switched jobs.

He also doesn’t like me talking to one of my guy friends who I dated like 12 years ago. Mind you my conversations contain nothing about “friend zone” or sexting because EWW and if I don’t want to be with someone I have the moral compass to leave them and not cheat. I haven’t talked to the friend/ex in over a month since he said he doesn’t like me talking to him as I’m trying to respect my husband.

I feel some days like I’m in a losing battle but other days I’m okay. I’m sure a lot of responses will say leave him but like I said I am trying my best to be an adult and work through the problem if it’s workable than have my children live in two different homes and have to go back-and-forth because they are very young.

Rawr!!

Am I in the wrong?

I’ve got a 8 week old baby and my partner works full time in a job that is 7 days a week! He is home for breakfast, lunch and dinner and in from 6pm! I’m getting frustrated I feel like I do everything by myself and he has to be told what to do, he doesn’t come and take our baby out of my arms without having to be told or asking if that’s what I need. I currently don’t have the brain capacity to be teaching him how to do all of this when I learnt it all by myself. I tried to have some me time and go for a bath last night while he put the baby to bed (which I do everything night while he sits on the sofa) despite being shown the bedtime routine before he told me “I’ll sit and hold him and you can put him to bed once you’re out the bath”! Needless to say I didn’t bother with the bath because I just feel I’m always neeeded! He gets mad/upset when I try and express that I’m upset so I feel I can’t even speak to him!
Am I in the wrong for wanting more?

I just want it all the end!!!!

Im just ready to end it all. I ask for help im crazy, I reach out to so call friends and family nothing. Im drowning in my own thoughts. I talk about my feelings and my thoughts all day and all this man does is shake his fucking head. Im about ready to kick it off his fucking shoulders!!! I do not get a break from these kids. Im in the house all day every day. Im about to lose my shit!!!!

overreacting or would you be mad too?

my son had a play at his school on wednesday, i went and watched him & as we were leaving he said goodbye to a little girl and she told him to give him a hug and he did so. mind you, this little girls mother watched this entire interaction and didn’t intervene. yesterday i got a letter in his folder sent home stating someone in his class has lice and to thoroughly check our children’s hair for the next few days to weeks. i explained to my son that it happens sometimes and often little kids have unfortunate home circumstances and they get lice because of things out of their own hands and it doesn’t make them gross or dirty, its just an unfortunate circumstance and to not even think of trying to figure out who it is and just let it go because we’re checking his head religiously daily now. well, today my son comes home and tells me that the little girl who hugged him wednesday came into the classroom today and announced to everyone that she is the one with lice. her mom sat and watched her daughter hug my son and didn’t say a word a day before the letter went out stating someone has it. would you be mad too? i mean yes i understand like i told my son sometimes people can’t help it and not everyone has a good home life, but to sit and watch her daughter hug my son probably already knowing her daughter has it.. i’m sort of angry with woman, as a mother i wouldn’t even think of letting my child touch another child if i knew my kid had lice and she just watched and didn’t say a thing. obviously i wasn’t expecting her to say hey don’t she has lice, but she could’ve just told her no or said something to prevent her from hugging my son.

Am I wrong to be mad ?

I currently work 1 and a half days a week. And my husband works 5-6 days a week. We barely make ends meet. But we do it somehow. We have 2 kids 10 months apart. And I feel like I’m drowning most of the time. On top of having 2 kids 10 months apart we also have 13 pets. Yes. 13. Now onto my issue. The housework gets away from me during the day because my kids constantly need me for one thing or another. So the only time I can get housework done is when my husband comes home. He’s blue collar and cuts trees. He’s gone at 5 am and home 4/5 pm everyday. Saturday is overtime and my one full day at work as a cosmetologist. My family watches the kids Saturdays on a rotating schedule to help out.

I’ll finally have the house in perfect order where I don’t feel like I’m drowning. And then I make the same speech over and over. I’m not your mother or your maid pick up your shit.

Well as usual that never lasts and every few months I have to have someone watch my kids so I can deep clean the house but it’s always a problem and process. He either has to be in the same room as me to “make it go faster” or do only outside work because “he’s not good with inside work “ well it’s that time again. And I always hate it because it’s time away from my kids. I feel guilty for my family always doing me the favor of watching them and then I do most of the work and get mad. Now this has been planned my mom will take my older one and my younger one will be home and I’m cleaning.

Now to why I’m mad. I’ve been asking and begging for help and to come home and just let me do my thing. I have my night routine after dinner and now he wants to help fine.

But now that someone is coming to watch the kids he wants to also on that same day have a BQ with his friends. Normally that doesn’t bother me were the first of our friend group to have a house and kids. Everyone else still lives at home. But I told him countless times if the house isn’t clean we can’t have the bbq I can’t do it all.

Well now the text went out without helping me around the house. It’s a bomb. Both kids are screaming. And I literally just wanna clean. I’m not asking for him to watch them alone or anything. I literally just want a clean house. It’s for my mental health. And I feel like a shit mom when the house gets like this because it limits where my kids can roam to.

Am I just being sensitive ?