Venting! False promises on support post partum

I just had my second baby in April. I had severe PPA and PPD with my first. In order to not go down that hill again, I talked with my mother who promised to support me by watching my toddler the first three months which are critical for mental health so my husband could take the baby and I could sleep during the day and he could cook for me so I eat. Based on this promise of support, my family moved cross country back to my hometown. Ever since I got here my mom has been MIA. She has multiple jobs 7 am - 7 pm (doesn’t need the money, even then I offered to pay her more than her job which she refused because this is her passion). She keeps saying she wishes she could help me but then when it’s time to help she won’t take any time off from her jobs?! Her jobs btw are working at a day care. She would rather take care of strangers children than her own grandchild. It’s driving me crazy and I’m starting to get very angry when she texts she wishes to help because obviously it’s false promises and fake love. I’m so disappointed and upset. She only “helps” on her time which is a few hours on weekends even then she has other children in the house she’s also watching. I’m so sad and my mental health is declining from sleep deprivation and constant toddler tantrums. My husband can’t take the baby so Im doing baby duty and cooking which is so draining. Whenever I say that to her, she says she raised me and my brother (7 years younger) alone so I should do the same. I don’t understand what her motivation is, does she hate me? Is her job that important?

in our community

Going back to work

My maternity pay is about to stop and I just can’t bring myself to go back to work! I am self employed so no rush back but we need the money.

I have postnatal anxiety and can’t leave my baby for more than an hour never mind with someone else other than my mum.

My mum works shifts which change every week so I can’t commit to anything. Does anyone know what type of job I could do without pushing my boundaries too much?

Looking for a lifetime best friend. 🥰

My name is Angel, I’m 28 mom of 3. I have a 4 year old daughter, 2 year old daughter, and a 4 month old son. Looking for a best friend.
I love art, being outdoors in nature. I love being a mom more than anything. I’m a little bit introverted but will open up the more I get to know you.
I’m an aspiring content creator and am actively working to better myself and my kids lives. Would love to find a bestie for me and possibly my kids.

I’m in the Los Angeles area 🥰

Noob question about re-entering society

Hi, very very basic q from anxious about to be first mum. When did you feel up to going out to socialise after the baby or even just out for a coffee? How soon were you getting back into the world?

Need some reassurance I’m not crazy

Yesterday was my baby daughter’s baptism. I have a 20 year old step daughter. She’s been staying at my mother in law’s house since college is out because she is able to use my mother in law’s car to drive around. When my step daughter got her work schedule at the ice cream place last week she called me and said she was put on to work the baby’s baptism even though she requested off. I said it was probably an oversight, call your boss asap and let her know. Well she told my mother in law she didn’t want to go to the baptism anyway because she didn’t want to be around her father, my husband. (There has been some jealousy since baby has been born) so she never had her schedule changed. My mother in law told me she will tell her she needs to call out or find her own way to work (because she wouldn’t have my mother in laws car) because I informed her how upset I would be considering I do A LOT for my SD. Day of the baptism I get told step daughter pushed work back to 3pm leaving exactly a half hour for her to come back to the house after the baptism. They came with a family friend/neighbor. Were at our home for a half hour after the baptism, took pictures, ate and then left. I’m so upset with not only my SD but my mother in law. There were so many other ways that could have been handled. My SD could have ubered to work. They could have taken two cars. My SD could have called out like my mother in law said she was going to tell her to do. She could have atleast pushed work to 5 so she could be here for 2 hours. I feel like my mother in law didn’t want to be here either and used it as her excuse to leave “oh I need to bring her to work” … no you don’t… she drives your car lol. My mother in law has been calling me all day and texting me and quite honestly I don’t know what to say to her. We get along quite well and talk daily but I’m so upset. They were the only other guests invited besides the god parents. I could have saved so much money, time, energy and we could have just taken the god parents to a nice restaurant for cheaper than what I spent to make the day so special. Not to mention my baby is named after my mother in law, and wore my mother in laws original baptism dress from 67 years ago.

Saying it here cause I can't say it outloud

I have devoted my life into being a wife and a mother
I regret nothing but it does leave heartache in some ways
Recently I tried to break back into the job field. Oof girls this one's been filled with disappointment. I cant find anything over minimum wage. Quickly realized I had no job skills. I had been carrying my husband's dreams. My kids needs. And now I feel like im looking across a lake i have to swim.

Need friends

Hey moms! I have an 11-week-old baby girl and I’m realizing how lonely postpartum life can feel sometimes. I don’t get out much and would really love some mom friends to talk to and connect with.

I’m in south Nampa if anyone would want to grab coffee, lunch, or hang out sometime! 😊 picture of my LO