Working mom guilt
I’ve been a SAHM for the past 3 years now, with two kids ages 3 years and 16months. I have my special education teaching license but had my daughter immediately after I graduated so I decided I wanted to stay home with her, then later decided to have another baby. My husband has a great job and we are grateful to have the opportunity to live on only his income, however, I love my career so much that I don’t want to give it up, and I am finally ready to go back to work this year. My husband has always preferred for me to stay home, but he also is very supportive of my goals and wants me to do what makes me happy.
As much as I know I have the support of my family and that’s all that matters, I can’t help but to feel guilty or shamed every time I talk to other people about it who don’t understand my decision. For instance, the other day I met with another mom for a play date and I mentioned that I was wanting to go back to work. She questioned my decision and then kind of proceeded to say that she could never leave her kids for a career.. It honestly made me feel guilt but also annoyed? Then I had another conversation with another mom friend and she also questioned why I wanted to work if I didn’t need to. And then proceeded to say “Oh well if you’re a teacher, you should homeschool your kids” But honestly, that’s just not something I want for me or for my kids. Like idk, I get that being a working mom is not for everyone, but like you don’t gotta question or shame other people’s decision..
Like believe me I know that I’m going to have a hard time transitioning back to work like, and of course I’m going to miss my kids, but I’m also going to chase my dreams and fill my cup and therefore be a better mom for it. And honestly, if I decide that working mom life is not for me, then I can just go back to being a SAHM since I am very fortunate to have the option to not work..
Anyways, that’s my lil rant that I wanted to get off my chest. I normally don’t let other peoples opinions get to me but I’ve just been feeling a lot of guilt lately, so just need to know I’m not alone in these feelings. Thanks 🤍
Could I be bi?
Ok, I’m beginning to be a tad confused over my sexuality. I’ve always thought I’m 100% straight. Only ever been with men and had any kind of like, romantic attraction with men. I’ve always thought I’m straight bc even though I can find women to be extremely attractive, it’s not like in a way where I’d want to be with them sexually or romantically. But as time goes on, I’m beginning to kinda question. This started with noticing creators like Lainabearrgrimes & ApocalypseBrute aka Brutus Brute Leo. Laina because I find her to be extremely attractive and I love her personality, and Brutus bc I find them somewhat attractive, and relate to how they prefer pillow princesses as a touch me not, which is something I could get down with. Honestly, I truly don’t know how to properly put my thoughts into words, so I do apologize for that. I’m just kinda questioning if maybe I’m bisexual, which is hard for me to grasp bc like I said, I’ve always considered myself to be 100% straight and only began questioning this earlier this year. I’m 23 for reference. I don’t want to jump the gun and say I’m bi when I’m genuinely unsure, ya know? This is also a tough situation bc I am in a long term committed relationship with a man (have been since I was 18). So even if I could possibly be bi, I feel like I’d have to hide that part of me, not bc he’s against the lgbtq+ community or anything (he’s bi), but bc I’m with him and always said I’m straight so I feel suddenly saying stuff like this may cause issues or that he wouldn’t take me seriously. Idk how to explain it.
Feeling alone
I feel like I’m loosing touch with people daily,
I don’t have many friends or mum friends as I cut people off easily,
And It take me a lot to let people in,
But I’m sick of always putting everyone else first, sick of changing plans to suit others only to be letdown time after time,
I’ve had enough of people saying they’re gonna come round. I will stay in and then they not turn up and give some fob excuse of why they didn’t
But every day i’m expected to wake up put a smile on my face and carry on like as if it didn’t affect me
Everyone sees me as this strong aggressive woman thats always there to talk to,
Don’t get me wrong if anyone needed to talk I’m always there for them, I will be that one to talk, to cry to, what ever,
even just someone to have tea or lunch with or a play date with the kids,
But when I tell a friend that I’m physically and emotionally exhausted, in pain and sick of seeing the same 4 walls,
They seem to start going on about how hard they have it like I don’t matter and they are worse off,
I feel so angry all the time.
Is it just me.
