Family bereavement

My MIL sadly passed away yesterday and I am 36 +3. She and family live 2 hours away so whilst we are there now I will return home tomorow. I’m a little anxious as we have family members asking what is best for us in terms of funeral arrangements and been so close to my due date I’m not really sure what to say or suggest. I’m planning a VBAC so don’t really want to be 2 hours from home and going into labour as I need to get to the hospital. And then there is my partner leaving me at home to be there for his mum ( we also have a toddler at home) . I really don’t know what to suggest to family at the moment as this has happend at the worst possible time 😢 I don’t really know why I’m posting as I know what is planned will happen but I just don’t know what to suggest to family at the moment that works best for us 🤷🏼‍♀️

in our community

Is this annoying?

My MIL only ever wants to go out with me and my kids if it’s eating.

She’s never really been out with my kids (age 7+) besides 1 time last year where my partner forced her to come for a day out around the city with us, she tried to cancel but he insisted she comes. Over the years I had invited her out for example, after Covid lockdown I was taking them to the park 5 minutes away and she cancelled with the excuse that she wanted to shower…

The issue is, with all respect, she is very lazy. She doesn’t like to go out unless it’s something that benefits her like a party or restaurant or date etc. the only time she ever suggests going out is if it’s to a restaurant to eat. For example, occasionally when it’s school break she will suggest us to do something with the kids, I’m like ofcourse! But then she will say let’s go to this restaurant or that restaurant.

As much as it’s still nice, if it’s school break and she wants to go out with the kids there are much better things they’d prefer to do then sit in a restaurant. We could take them for a walk, to the park, do an activity etc. I also think it’s partly because she never did any of those things with her own children.

So today she has suggested we go to eat out, but it’s a warm sunny day and I much rather get them out to be active

How do u deal with this?

So recently my stepdad (soon to be ex-stepdad because him and my mom are getting divorced) found out I’m pregnant, by recently, I mean yesterday.
At first he was acting like he’s so supportive but being a typical co-parent and also being disappointed. So today I’m waking up from my sleep to go to work and I hear him outside complaining and being two-faced about the whole situation. He’s basically was blaming my mom for letting my boyfriend so call “groom” me and me getting pregnant and a bunch of other stuff.
I’m trying to keep myself calm and collected and not lose my cool but he’s not making it easy for me to feel comfortable in ny house if he’s gonna act one way in front of me and then go act a different way behind my back. I’m trying to give him a chance but I’ve given him many chances and honestly I’m not trying to deal with this for the rest of my pregnancy and after because that’s only increasing my chance of postpartum.
Can anyone tell me how I should deal with this because at this point I’m gonna lose it

Postpartum dad struggling?

Hi I’ve noticed my partner is struggling to cope quite bad . He seems very irritable & short fuse since little one was born ( his first ). It’s not anything either children is doing or anything that irritates him directly either . I’ve noticed he also seems to panic when settling little one ( if it goes on too long he’ll ask me to settle her because he gets extremely overwhelmed) . How do we combat this together? I’m concerned he needs therapy or some type of help because we’re week 4 nearly & it’s not improving from current state . Any advice please?

Am I over reacting ?

Me and my BD are not in a good space at all. We clash and disagree on everything.
He goes out every weekend till 6am and we have 2 children under 2 the following day he to exhausted to even entertain his children who want to play.
I have been in hospital with my oldest I messaged the BD to let him know he was extremly funny with me. He then did not answer any of my calls. I sent him messages to keep him updated with what was happening. He never responded to anything. Eventually 6hrs later we was let home only to find him not return to the house and still not communicate with me at all to shecknon his child.
To me this is not a man who priorities his children this is not man showing he cares.
I’m fuming with him as I would push aside all my issue if my child was poorly in hospital and prioritise her and I expect the same from her dad.

What should I do ?

Venting

Omfg we had our 3 kids (18 months, 3, & 6) in 4 and a half years and I swear to fucking god I haven’t finished a train of thought, task, meal in peace since. Like not one single thing. My eldest is probably gifted, probably adhd, and she’s always talking, asking questions, pestering. The younger two are toddlers. I just tried to put together a new piece of furniture and my youngest is messing it all up (I should have done it during her nap, I know. I’m just so sick of not being able to “just do” something). I messed up the table, because my toddler was fucking around with everything. Now she won’t nap and I can hear my eldest about to run in to ask me something annoying like “can I have cake?” Even though she’s sick home from school.

I NEED A HOLIDAY DO FREAKING BAD.

SAHM thinking about childcare

I’m spent and considering part time childcare even though I’m at home. Found a place that can give me 2 times a week. Feeling a bit guilty about it but I have no help- no nanny , no parents or anyone to help me besides my partner who does his best but works nights. Any thoughts? For context I have an almost 9 month old.