2 LOs in nursery too much financially?

I have a 18m old and now feel like I'm in a place to start trying for a 2nd child soon. We are 35 & 37 too and don't want to wait too long.
The thing that holds us back from adding another child is finances. Even though we are both on fairly good salaries, both £65k (when full time). Our largest bills are mortgage and nursery.
I work part time at the moment to keep nursery cost down to around £400 a month and spend time with my child, our parents still work full time and cannot look after our child in the week om a regular basis.

My question is how do people make is work when having a second child? Ive heard of some nurseries give a small discount for 2nd child in nursery, are preschools or nurseries at school cheaper?

I dont think me being a stay at home mum would work, my husband couldnt cover all the bills himself on a £60k household income.
But cant imagine how we'd make it work paying £800 a month for childcare for 2 (for 3 days nusery).

If you have similar situation and making it work please let me know to give me hope 🙏 🙂

in our community

How!?

How are people getting out and about, to groups, to the shop. Little one is 7 months old, weaning but also breastfed. I am a living zombie. They feed minimum 5 times per night with cluster feeding towards morning. I am dead on my feet. Zero energy for most other things and I am pushing myself to my absolute limits. I have another child who is older but lack of trusted family support. How do people actually put make up on brush hair and go out? I feel like I am barely living.

What do i do?

Husband finally told me what was wrong after telling me he was fine the last few days while being short and not really talking to me at all. He said he’s sick of the house being a disaster and that he can get stuff done while watching our son so why can’t I. He said sometimes you’ll just have to listen to him scream which I cannot do. I am a SAHM to our one year old son(it was his birthday today). I have tried to explain that our son is more clingy with me and it is next to impossible to get everything done when it’s just the two of us. He said no one can help me until I help myself. He doesn’t like that I ask for help and don’t like going places with our son without having another person go with us. Our son is very high energy and so it makes going to the store alone with him very difficult. My husband also complained about how I never go to bed with him because I say i have stuff to do first. I am the one who puts our son to bed every night while my husband usually showers or sits on the couch on his phone. Then after our son goes to bed if I had time to cook dinner before then we eat if not I then cook dinner. After we eat I then have to pack up the food and my husband’s lunch for work, do the dishes, wash the bottles, prep bottles for morning, pick up toys, and fold the laundry I managed to do that day. I have tried to tell him that if he could do even a couple of those things for me then I would probably be able to go to bed with him but he doesn’t. He ended the conversation by saying he was done and he doesn’t care anymore. He will just stop expecting me to do anything but keep our kid alive while he’s at work and then he went to bed. What do i do? Idk how to respond to any of this or how to act now. I will fully admit that I am not the best at keeping a clean house. It’s messy but we are also still remodeling and don’t have upper cabinets in the kitchen for instance so there is no storage and everything ends up cluttered. I just don’t know what to do anymore.

How would you feel if your mom told you that your uncle, his wife, your cousin mention they want to help you but they don’t know how since your so difficult- but they never offered or said it to you directly ?

I got upset cus I’m like these people never ever offered help and their just gossiping abt how I’m difficult. I did ask my cousin to babysit one time recently and she said my daughter behaved good but she didn’t say let me know if you ever need help again.

Annoyed and need a rant

My son is 2, and I have done every bed time, every wake up since my son was born. He's sick at the moment, has a cough, and it's keeping him up all night. It's been going on for a week, so in the last week I've probably slept for about 4 hours in total. Fine.

Today, I have a 12 hour shift. I work for the NHS in a very demanding role. I asked my son's Dad to sit with our son for 2 hours last night. 2 hours where I would go into a spare room and have 2 hours of uninterrupted sleep. Then I would take over again. I don't think I was asking the earth.

After 20 minutes, he came to wake me in a flap to tell me he can't cope.

So here I am, up to do a 12 hour shift. On 20 mins sleep. Bringing the grand total sleep time over the last 8 days to 4 hours and 20 mins.

Why are men so useless?

Am I the problem or is she a problem?

I think I have to fight my son, father mother so basically I asked his sister can she ask her mother? Can I get the car seat? This was the message that I received from My Baby Daddy Mother and I’m a show the rest at the bottom

Umbilical Hernia

My daughter has a granuloma coming out of her belly button. She has been eating, then pooping, then I go to change her and she scream cries, then the cycle starts all over for the last 4 hours. My husband just got home from work and is crabby from his day. I called the Drs office. We originally had a drs appointment Thurs to have it looked at but her crying and pushing her belly out is making it worse. The drs office said of it looks worse go to the ER but they also moved up her appointment to tomorrow at 10:30am. My husband said his boss is gonna be mad and I frankly don't care. We have a newborn baby and any time he tells his boss about drs appointments he gets mad. I'm so stressed out. Idk if she can wait until tomorrow. 🥺