BD is failing his child

My daughter recently told me when she’s with her dad on his weekends sometimes he puts the TV on and just goes to chill in his bedroom and scroll his phone when she’s under his care. He does this often according to her and he’s on his phone for long periods while she just sits in front of the tv.

We coparent, she’s 5.

I want to say something to him about this without him getting upset or offended. How do I do that?

I also want suggested if he’s checked out to just bring her home. She expressed when he does this it makes her feel lonely. It’s breaking my heart

in our community

Nurseries closing (UK based) but still having to pay!

Would love to know some thoughts because I’m torn on it. Don’t want my little one put at risk in an unsafe environment but also why aren’t we better equipped within the nursery settings? We’ve had enough heatwaves in the UK now to know. Thoughts?

Being a working mom with a SAHD husband is really lonely

I work full time as a nanny (so taking care of children very close in age with my son) while my husband left his culinary career to be a SAHD when we got priced out of childcare only a few months after starting.

SAHM refuse to allow my husband into their special girls only clubs and we cant find any other SAHD in our area so he's completely alone.

I have found mostly moms that judge me for working instead of him, judge me for being a nanny instead of caring for my own son during the day, or get annoyed at my parenting deciscions because I diddnt exclusively breastfeed and contact nap and bedshare.

The working moms all have office jobs so its hard to relate, I have found very little success meeting other blue collar moms in my area, and if one more SAHM tells me they couldn't imagine leaving their baby to take care of someone else's baby all day im going to scream.

Is there ANYONE who can relate, even a little bit?

How would you approach this?

In the park with my 6 year old and the sprinklers are on. She's playing in them and there's a bucket (like a sand bucket) on the ground, so she picks it up and starts filling it with water.
When we were about to leave the park, my daughter says "that lady over there was so rude to me. She told me if I want to play with the buckets that I should save my money and order it or buy it because it's not that expensive" . If you know anything about me, you'd have to assume I would say something because are you fucking joking lmao.

So I approach her and ask "did you tell my daughter that she should save her money and buy her own bucket?" And she kind of laughs like that was ridiculous and then says I told her these buckets belong to these kids and that it isn't hers and they're not very expensive on Amazon if she wants to get one.
I replied "she's a child."
Then she says "well I told her no and she kept stealing them and filling them up"
So I replied "stealing?" to which she said "well not stealing, but she played with it after I told her no"
I said "it's a bucket" and she continues defending her stance and I just okayed her like 3 times and left her talking. The words I wanted to use just weren't worth it. And it was so hot and we were already leaving the park. But oooooh I wish I witnessed the exchange because wtf? And my daughter is super sweet and friendly, so if she was a little jerk I'd understand more.
And what kind of parent says you can't play with my kid's things? A water bucket? In the park? Really? Like it's your right, but grow up?

Found out my husband (sorta) cheated

My husbands phone broke last week and he finally took it to Apple yesterday and they were able to fix/recover everything. We’ve never had secrets or hidden things and I have always had access to his phone so last night after he went to bed I went into his hidden photos to make sure my sexy photos I’ve sent were still on his phone or if I needed to send him new ones.

And boy was I SHOCKED. He had THOUSANDS of AI pictures of naked women just all over it from like 2024-mid2025. And if that isn’t bad enough, he had *recent* screenshots of pictures and videos of naked women off Snapchat stories. Starting sometime at the end of summer last year all the way through my pregnancy early this year and during my miscarriage. Even specific ones on the day of our anniversary and 2 days after we lost our baby.

I have felt completely gutted ever since I found them (on accident I was not snooping). My entire body has felt heavy and sick and shaky. I feel so disgusted that these skinny women with huge boobs and butts are all over his phone when I am the biggest I’ve ever been after losing our second child. The worst part is these women look nothing like me. I confronted him and he deleted everything but he didn’t see it as cheating even though I’ve specifically said it before that I’m not okay with it and that if he wants time to himself (which I support) he should only look at pictures of me. I feel like our whole relationship and marriage is just a huge joke. And now I am questioning everything.

If you’ve made it this far, thank you but am I valid for feeling this way? I know I should be but this just took me for complete surprise and I just feel broken.

For the record I don’t want to end our marriage but I also don’t know how to get past this (yet) and I told him if he ever does this again then I’m done.

Advice on Relationship.

Hi Everyone, I’m first time mum at 31 years old and just need some Advice on my relationship whether it’s healthy relationship and it is controlling?

Since we had our daughter together,
I feel like there’s more control now than before like having a go at me how I treat our daughter and doesn’t like that I have opinion on things I feel like I’m walking on egg shells most of the time but it’s ok for him to tell me few weeks ago if we split up our daughter is living with him but I can still come and see her but that’s not for him to decide! He’s grabbed my neck before in argument and he throws things when he’s in heated argument with me in front of our daughter, one time he throw controller at my knee then says stop been pathetic that shouldn’t hurt, When we have Arguments he calls me names like prick, thick cunt, spacker how can you call woman them words except me to be ok with it! Behind closed doors he’s different person to in public but ages ago he kicked off in pub when we was having meal out with our child because I told him he was taking control because he just took my phone off me without asking then started crying because how he reacted I just felt embarrassed to be honest. It is all in my head or is this relationship one sided and controlling?

AITA? Giiirrrlls buckle yourselves in for this one.

I'm a single mum with an almost 6 month old, left my baby's "dad" when I was 10wks pregnant after a short 4 month relationship because he was severely controlling. April last year he got drunk and as i was asleep he went through my phone and found pics/videos on my Google photos of me and my first ever boyfriend FROM WHEN I WAS 19 (I'm 27 now) which I didn't even know were there, I've then woken up and realised what he was doing and took my phone off him. I had only been asleep for 45 minutes and in that time he had drank 2 bottles of wine. I delete the rest of the photos infront of him and go upstairs to bed in his house.. told him I'm tired and he can join me if he wants to.

About 15 minutes later he came upstairs and had no coordination whatsoever, stumbling around the room and laughing. I told him it wasn't funny, got up and put my fleece on to go and get some air and then he pushes me back onto the bed with force. I got up quickly and pushed him too, said what are you doing, then he pushes me again into the clothes rack but I found my footing at the last second so I didn't end up on the floor. I screamed at him "why are you trying to hurt me, look at yourself!!" & he sat on the end of his bed and looked like he was ashamed of himself. I was in the doorway and said to him, what if I was pregnant, what if I was at the top of the stairs would you have still pushed me? (Little did I know, I was pregnant) I then went downstairs and into the garden, locked the patio doors behind me because I didn't feel safe. He then follows me 5 minutes later but because I've got the key he goes out the front door and tries to get to me by going through his next door neighbour's garden. I locked myself back inside and rang my mum to come and get me cause I really didn't know what he wanted to do to me.
He ended up falling asleep when he went back into the living room and before I left I told him that I hope when he wakes up he remembers why I've left. He just told me to fuck off.
April 5th '25 - In the morning I'm hounded with messages and voice notes saying he had a blackout and doesn't remember anything, where am I etc etc.
I told him what happened and said its rather convenient he doesn't remember.
I don't speak to him for a few days and then its my 26th birthday and I stupidly went back with him.. we then find out I'm pregnant and he initially told me that if I'm serious about him he thinks we should 'let this one go' & try again when we're both ready.
I said I'll be having the baby with or without him, I don't need him etc.
I go for a scan the following week and I'm 6 weeks gone... the controlling gets worse week by week, at this point he doesn't even want me to be spending time with my friends without him even when he's at work for 14hrs. then I broke things off for good 3rd June '25 via phone call. Collected my things from his house a few days later but took 3 people with me incase he tried anything.

I told him I wouldn't use my baby as a weapon and he told me he wanted nothing to do with the baby unless we were living under the same roof (like are you actually okay?) I said thats obviously not going to be happening and not to worry because I won't ask for a single penny from him, no nappies, nothing.

Now he's started to send message requests and friend requests to my friends for information on me and my son, yet he knows where my grandma and my mum live so if he really wanted to see him then surely he would have tried that route, no? He doesn't know where I live as I recently moved out of my mums place late last year before I had my boy.

What would you do in this situation?
AITA for not letting him try? I just don't think I'd feel okay leaving my son with him alone, and my ex is also from India and I have the fear in me that he could take him away from me and never come back - you hear the stories all the time and I'd never forgive myself.
I just think that he already gave up on my son once when he was still growing inside me, so what's to say he wouldn't do it again.

Honest opinions please ❤️