Selfish “friend”

I don’t know if am being insensitive or my feelings are valid but I have a friend that I see regularly but I have noticed it only seems to be when they are wanting something? Like they’ll invite me down to their house but will say can you do this for me for example spot clean the mattress, tidy the kids bedrooms or put clothes away but they’ve got a partner at home who doesn’t work and neither do they and have a third child on the way like I just feel like they only want me for their benefit and if I let them down on the day am meant to do something they’ll make me feel guilty by saying “knew you weren’t gonna come” or if I go out with other friends they’ll constant ring or FaceTime then if I don’t answer they think am being funny it is just starting to get to me now but I can’t say how I feel otherwise it turns into argument that will last for days and they send massive essays it’s draining

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Your feelings are 10000% valid, this doesn’t sound like a genuine friendship to me. I’m not sure what the total picture looks like but what does your friend do for you? If the friendship isn’t mutual in that sense but depends on you only running errands and doing chores it kinda sounds like your friend is just taking advantage of you.

That’s not a friend, you’re just an unpaid cleaner to them.

Do you actually do what they ask you to? Like you’ve actually spot cleaned their mattress or tidied their kids bedroom?? 😮

If you have, sorry but more fool you. You need to speak up for yourself and learn how to say no.

The fact you said you can’t say how you feel to this person, yea you need to dead this “friendship”. I would probably send her one text saying you no longer wish to remain friends with her/no longer compatible, wish her the best and then straight block her on everything.

Don’t let her be an energy vampire, you don’t need to waste your time reading her essays pleading for another chance. You’ve made a decision, time to stick to your own boundaries and stand by it. This person is NOT your friend. You really need to up your standards if you think they are.

Thats not a friend at all, they are using you

I'd get rid of said 'friend', that's not how you treat your friends, sorry it's happening to you 😔

I can honestly see both sides. It does sound like she’s leaning on you a lot, and the guilt-tripping and getting upset when you spend time with other friends isn’t fair. But I also can’t help feeling a bit for your friend. She’s pregnant, has two children already and another on the way, so she may genuinely be struggling.
We also don’t know what’s going on at home. Just because her partner doesn’t work doesn’t necessarily mean he’s supportive or pulling his weight. She could be carrying most of the physical and emotional load and relying on you because she feels like she has no one else. That doesn’t make it okay to overstep your boundaries, but it might explain why she’s behaving this way. I think it’s worth having an honest conversation before assuming she’s only using you x

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Annoying husband or ungrateful wife🤷‍♀️

For context, we decided to wait until our LO is about 2 before enrolling him in a nursery, that’ll be 2027 so I stay home with him. It’s not been easy but I think I manage fine. But somedays I’m tired and need me-time.

When my husband gets home from work, he goes out with the LO for a walk so I get to have a few minutes to get myself sorted out so I have a quick shower, eat and have a lie down. But once he’s back everything is back to mummy.
Most days I don’t mind but right now I’m on my period and I’m fatigued.

So husband needed me to help with something and I say oh can I help you now because I’m tired and want to go to bed early. He stays dragging his feet so I repeat “I’m tired, my eyes are heavy already, let’s get it done now so I can sleep” (mind you, time is about 10pm so it’s not even early) then he laughs and says “What’s making you tired? You’re home all day, I had a long day at the office, I still went on a walk with LO so you could rest so I’m the one supposed to be tired not you”. I told him off though and I do not feel bad one bit.

And this isn’t the 1st, 2nd or 3rd time he’s made statements like this and it pisses me off soo much because he can’t handle our LO home alone for 10 minutes without turning on the TV. I spend all day with him active playing, little to no screen time, he’s still nursing so boob on demand, I still have to sort laundry, make sure we have dinner all this while on my period with the worst back pain and yet I’m home all day apparently doing nothing.

He has since apologised and I apologised too for going off and I still help with what he needed help with and eventually went to bed at about 11pm.

So would you say I’m ungrateful or he’s annoying? I know my answer 😂

Spoiler Alert: Toy Story 5

I just wanted to post this somewhere without spoiling it for anybody who hasn't seen it yet.

There's a part in the movie where Jessie gets sent back to her first kids home. I got a bit ahead of myself and assume the story was going somewhere it wasn't, so I ended up a little disappointed 😅

When I saw the scene with her and the giant horse, I thought ohhh it's gonna bring her kid as a grown woman into it and show how all that cowgirl play shaped who she became as an adult. I got emotional thinking about it 😂 because I was like, this is what kids with limitless screens are missing. They grow up to be adults addicted to screens instead of something really aspirational and exciting, or creative or thrilling , ya know the things that make life worth living and give us a healthy sense of self and belonging.

Anyway, it turned out it wasn't and in the end the devices are portrayed as not so bad since they want to help their kids too 🙄 I know it's a kids movie and all but I'm curious what others thoughts were on that "conclusion"? I sort of respect it, I mean in reality we have to accept this is the world we live in now and they have their place in it, I just feel like they could have done a better job showing the benefits of kids who grow up playing with toys vs being so sedentary and lacking social skills.

Did you feel disappointed in the message or lack of one in the conclusion of the movie?

Potty training

Scenario. Your adult daughter lives next door and has her office setup in your living room. She’s at your house alone everyday with her baby and toddler while she works. Toddler is now partially potty trained and still has accidents. Where the office is you have area rugs, no carpet, and nice couches. Naturally you’re worried about potty accidents.
Do you
A. Ask her to look into the toddler having full time care so he can stay somewhere not in your home until potty training is all done. (Costs money)
B. Ask her to put him in pull ups at your house. (Makes potty training regress)
C. Ask her what her plan is for accidents because you don’t want any messes to get missed or furniture ruined. (Might be hard to multitask)
D. Ask if you can help rearrange furniture, surely the 1-1/2 bedroom house they rent might fit an office if things are out in storage. (Limited space)
…I am the daughter and trying gage if my parents reaction is reasonable

Do I still apply for free nursery hours if I’m not sure yet?

Hi mamas! I won’t be bringing my baby girl to nursery until she can speak or possibly not at all. I just wanted to ask… should I still apply for the free childcare hours, or is there no point if she won’t be attending nursery?

Also, if I can still apply now just in case I change my mind about nursery later on, when would I need to apply by? She’ll be 4 months soon xx

What do you do when you don’t have the fight in ya anymore?

I homeschool my children. They are 6 years, 5 years, and 4 months old. After fighting them all day to do the things they need to I just don’t have any fight left in me and feel defeated at the end of the day.

By fight I mean all day I have had to get on them about doing something and literally everything is met with “aww man” “I don’t want to” “ why do I have to do everything?” (Meaning the few chores I have them do) And so on. They always do what is asked but at a certain point I just don’t have it in me to correct them or listen to them complain. Please tell me I am not the only one that feels this way.

Nursery Query

Hi all

My little one is 2 and turns 3 this time next year so I will be looking at putting her into Nursery.

When are they eligible?

(I am not talking about funded hours for working parents as I’m aware you’re eligible from 9 months) I mean the hours that were in place before this?

Do you still need to contribute to costs, like the funded hours?

I was looking at putting her in earlier as I work, but the extra costs I had to pay on top of the funding just wasn’t worth it for me as I couldn’t afford that much more money coming out of my account - my friend said she had her daughter in Nursery at 3 and didn’t have to pay anything (this was 3 years ago)

Not sure if anything had changed and when would I apply? It’ll be for the next year September start?