I had to have an episiotomy done when giving birth. I'm currently 12 weeks pp and tried to be intimate with my husband and it hurt so much. Are there any other women that have had similar experiences with their episiotomy scar? What can I do to make it better and less painful?
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Same here, same time frame. First things first you need to make sure you are as relaxed as possible. Plus it also helps if you feel like having sex which you said that you do ☺️👍
You could try some music like white noise or sound bath on Spotify (providing its not too loud) or mamube some music you and your husband enjoy singing.
Once you got all that sorted I cant stress this enough make sure you use protection and lube is a must. It may still hurt a little bit but after a few times it wont. I'm now over 2 years PP and I can't even feel the scar now. Good luck 👍

It feels so different for me too 😔 I find it really uncomfortable even with lube and puts me off.

I unfortunately had a third degree tear. It honestly took me about 4 months to even attempt this with my husband and it eventually became painless at the 7 month mark. I am now 15 months PP and I wouldn’t even know the tear had happened.
It can take time for things to go back to normal and scar tissue can be sensitive for a while and can even have long lasting sensitivity. I can’t say anything helped, apart from time.

This happened to me. It was so painful. It got better after 4 months or so but it'd now dryness becaue im breastfeeding... the joys if postpartum

A little TMI- I am 9 weeks pp and only had sex a few days ago after having my episiotomy. My partner had a little feel of everything to see how it felt and to almost “loosen” everything and we used lots of lube.
It does hurt a little at first, but make sure you’re relaxed and comfortable. After a few seconds it feels a lot better. If it’s unbearable just wait until you’re ready, I tried at about 7 weeks and I wasn’t ready until a few days ago. Hope this helps x

Lubricant
You'll be tighter then you were due to scarring

I'm reading these thinking how did anyone manage to have sex so soon. And not just because of an episiotomy (i also had). But because the baby in the room..it was such a battle at bedtime, then add in being touched out from BFing..I think it was like 6 or 7 months before we tried. And we've only done once or twice. It definitely feels uncomfortable in general. But that's more the lacking in action. Sometimes we baby fights bedtime til gone 10pm. I am so not in the mood then, especially as I struggle to switch my brain off before bed. I can be awake another few hours, hubby with be snoring in 5 minutes. Then I'll potentially need to do a feed or 2..so yeah it's more libido for me over my scar now. I put it off initially because of the episiotomy. But actually finding time and willpower is hard...is that just me? X