Is there ever a morally grey area regaurding cheating?

Every relationship defines cheating in their own way. Of course there some pretty universal hard lines, but I think sexual fantasies are totally normal.

It hurts me to hear he doesn’t prioritize your sexual pleasure alongside his. Of course you’re not attracted to him! He’s not trying to be attractive.

Regardless, you won’t fix it without talking to him. Have an honest conversation with yourself first. What are you willing to tolerate and what needs do you need him to meet? Know what you’re asking for before you confront him. (I don’t want you to like pictures those types of accounts, but you can still subscribe as long as you do it when I’m not around. I want you to perform foreplay like watching a sexy movie in bed. I want flowers on Friday. I want a kiss hello every day.)

Trust me: we can’t trust them to find garlic powder. Of course we need to explain what we want and how to love us properly. I blame Hollywood with this notion of “it’s romantic to guess”. It’s not. Just talk.

This dude sucks fr. Im sorry that youre tied to him. Cheating is not the answer bc he may lash out at you and become violent if he finds out. You should focus your energy into finding an out, secret apartment, friends to live with, etc and worry about finding someone to appreciate you later on, a rash decision will almost always end poorly.

I don’t think the desire to feel loved, wanted, and appreciated makes you a bad person. When someone feels neglected, disrespected, or emotionally alone for a long time, it’s human to crave that connection somewhere else.

That being said, I don’t think cheating would actually give you what you’re looking for. It might give a temporary feeling of being desired, but it could also add more hurt, stress, and complications to an already difficult situation.

What stood out to me more is the verbal abuse and the fact that you’re feeling like you’re losing yourself in this marriage. Even if he isn’t abusive all the time, you still deserve to feel safe, respected, and valued. I’m glad you’re thinking about your future and working toward what you need.

Maybe instead of asking “is cheating morally grey?” the bigger question is “what do I need to feel whole again while I figure out my next steps?” You deserve support, kindness, and to feel like a person—not just a wife or mom.

Yes. Your relationship is already over; You guys just haven’t officially said it yet. If you’re communicating long term about the same things and there’s no change, it’s natural to crave a different path. But better to leave and be by yourself for a while.