Stressful days out..

How old are they both ?

I was exactly the same as this, I hated taking them out when the youngest was still napping. And on the rare occasions that we did go out for a “fun family outing” it just hammered home the point that it’s too stressful and no one is having fun.

Me and my husband decided that it just wasn’t worth it until the youngest had dropped his nap or was closer to dropping it and could power through the odd day. And honestly, I didn’t even mind missing out on things with friends/family because I knew it would be awful if we went.

I based everything around that nap, so it was early out and then they could fall asleep in the car on the way back from somewhere. Or we’d travel during the nap, then one of us stay in the car if they needed a little longer when we arrived.
It wasn’t forever and it worked for us 😁

Protect your peace 👌🏼

It’s ok to say no or to limit it to shorter outings. The caveat being that your son won’t learn to listen on outings without practice and exposure. Feel free to ignore this, but I found my little guy used to nap really well if I was babywearing when he was little. I’d walk around comfortably with him snoozing away.

My daughter is on one nap usually 12-2.
My family are GREAT with this and we always go somewhere for opening and have an early lunch and then set off back about 12.30-1. She naps on way home then transfers to cot and gets her 2 hours. I know it means days out are cut short, but this way everyone has a good time.