Mamas with depression, anxiety, and other mental health disorders

Doing it alone.

People tell you, “You’re so strong, you’ve got this” but the truth is… I don’t always want to be strong.

No one really understands what it’s like to go through pregnancy alone until they’ve lived it.

It’s coming home after an exhausting day, emotionally, physically and mentally drained and realizing there’s no one waiting to hold you. No one to rub your aching back or your sore feet. No one to wrap their arms around you and remind you that you’re not carrying all of this by yourself.

It’s feeling your baby move in the middle of the night and instinctively reaching for someone who isn’t there. It’s wanting to share those little moments that make your heart so full, only to realize you’re the only one experiencing them.

It’s looking at things in the nursery that still need to be built, things in the garden that still need to be sorted, food shop that still needs to be carried and knowing there isn’t anyone to say, “Sit down. I’ll take care of it” or “I’ve got it love, don’t worry ”

People see the baby bump, but they don’t see the tears cried in an empty house. They don’t see the nights you wish you had someone to lean on or the moments you quietly grieve the family you thought your child would one day have.

I already love this baby more than words can ever say and I wouldn’t change them for anything in this world! But that doesn’t erase the heartbreak of walking through one of life’s biggest moments without the person I thought would be beside me through it all.

I know I have family and friends around me who are always there no matter what and I appreciate them so bloody much for helping me every step of the way. Honestly I’m so so grateful for every single one of them I really am.

But some days the loneliness is louder than I know how to explain. Loneliness in pregnancy is something that isn’t spoken about enough and it’s a problem.

This is meant to be the most magical and memorable times of my life but for some reason its been made to feel like one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to experience.

I will forever be grateful for the tiny little heartbeat growing inside me and I will continue to love and protect my baby with my life there’s no doubt about that, but I’ll never truly understand why this had to be my experience through pregnancy.

The day I can hold you in my arms and just know you’re here, you’re safe and with me is the day I honestly cannot wait for. That’s the day I’ll truly be at ease.

I know we’ll get through this together, just hold on tight and stay with me through this little one. We’ll be ok. We’ve got this,
Me&You 👣💛

in our community

Universal credit question

Hi mums!

I’m planning on going back to work part time so 20 hours due to childcare issues so can’t go full time. I am on universal credit & getting housing benefit from it too. Just wondering would me going part time affect my universal credit payments. Would it reduce ? Has any other mums gone part time that’s on universal credit. I’ve had some people tell me I’m better off not working & staying on UC as me being part time would be the same income as universal credit takes some off from it.

Argument over house bills left me feeling like a shitty mum

Long story but short rant. Due to move into our first we bought together. I’m on maternity leave. He brings home 3k alone without commission. I’m entitled for suggesting the idea of combining wages. Paying the house bills alone out of it. Splitting what’s left to keep for ourselves and to pay our own bills out of that. So one person wasn’t left without for the whole month while the other has double left for the whole month. No one would ever be in a worse position than the other. It worked out we’d both have the same a month. Even if we didn’t do it that way and he paid the majority of the bills he’d still be left with what he would have if wages was combined anyway. But apparently im entitled. I had the baby in my arms when I raised my voice. He made me feel like a shit mum for raising my voice with baby in my hand whilst he was only on the couch 1 meter away raising his voice. If you earn more than someone else I’d like to think you’d want to contribute more where the other person can’t? If the household expidenture wasn’t so high and I have my own bills and he doesn’t then obviously I’d go 50/50. Didn’t think I was asking for much. He “shouldn’t pay more for having the ‘better job’ “

Heyyy!

Hi! My name is carrigan. Im 22 and a stay at home mom. Im looking to make some mom friends who are down to earth and not judgemental. I have a 4yr old son and planning on having another baby soon. Im engaged to my wonderful partner parker. I have 2 cats and a dog. I am very open and honest. I love pizza and mexican food. I can be antisocial but once you get to know me im very friendly and open. I love going on walks when it's not to hot. Ask me anything 😊

Birth plans & postpartum care

I’m 37 weeks today and feel like I don’t have a good enough idea of a birth plan. How is everyone else getting along with it?

Also, what’s everyone got for postpartum care? I have a few packs of postpartum pants, pads and a peri bottle but that’s about it. Do I need much else?

Any reassurance appreciated!

I apologise for the long post I just don’t know how to feel and think I need some clarity. For reference we have a 3 month old who was born 8 weeks premature and a nearly 3 year old. Pregnancy with my second was absolutely awful, I had loads of issues and pretty much stayed in hospital for the 2 months before he was born. Getting pregnant was an accident and I knew from the start my partner didn’t want another child but I also knew I definitely couldn’t go through with an abortion so I told him I would understand if he wanted to leave but I was going to be keeping the baby. We broke up briefly quite early on in pregnancy but he came back saying that he’d stay and have the baby with me.

We started off okay but once the health issues started he told me every day I should’ve just “gotten rid of the thing” and since baby’s been here it’s only gotten worse. He’s always telling me he still wants to put him up for adoption etc. Baby doesn’t sleep well at all and quite often I’ll be up every half an hour with him. My partner won’t get up with him and tells me I wanted the baby so it’s my problem. A couple weeks ago I was up with the baby and hadn’t slept in a couple of days, I was crying and he told me to be quiet so he could sleep. I’m a SAHM and he earns the money. I’m always allowed things I ask for but I don’t have any access to money and when I’ve asked about it he says that he earns it so it’s his not mine. He keeps telling me that when he leaves me I’ll have nothing, and yesterday told me that it’s probably because I have post partum depression that I annoy him because I’m not the person he fell in love with but I feel like I can’t come out of that if I’m constantly having no sleep and being so busy during the day with two kids, house work etc. He’ll make comments about my weight after having the baby but now he’s started being quite mean to my toddler and I just can’t see how I can raise two lovely boys if their roll model is being so horrible all of the time. I love him, he was so lovely when we met I just don’t know what’s happened I just think for the sake of my boys I need to leave but I feel so trapped in my situation.

Besties? SoCal

Hey everyone I’m Mia. Im a 25 yo single mama who still likes to do fun stuff. If you’re down for picnics, theme parks, play dates, turning up a little here and there 👀🥂, indoor playgrounds, coffee dates, walks, & the gym hmu.