How can I get my mom to understand she needs to help with my kids?
I have twins who are 5 years old. My daughter is developing fairly normally, she's just slightly behind. My son has had serious health problems since birth and has struggled with growth, mobility, and is several years behind on all milestones. He does not speak, walks very poorly, cannot climb steps ect. My mom does not visit or help in any capacity. The children really do not understand that she's someone of any importance. They treat her with as much excitement as the grocery store checkout employee. I am in great need for rest, a second set of hands, babysitting coverage when my son is regularly hospitalized. I see everyone else with grandparents who take their grandkids for the weekend because they want to, buy them gifts, get excited to see them, take them to activities such as the park or for a meal, enjoy photographs of them, attend their achievements and activities. My mom their only grandparent has never done any of this. She lives 20 mins away and drives well. So distance or transportation is not an excuse. She is also a millionaire so it's not a financial problem. She does not contribute financially to help with her absence as a grandparent. I am exhausted to the point that I'm unsure how I will continue most of the time. I have asked her to help many many times. It's always no. She also expects me to drive her to appointments, arrange her appointments ect when she's fully capable of doing it herself. I do not have time or energy for any if this. When she does come to my home she brings bags and bags of expired food, expired formula when the babies were little, extremely worn used kids clothes that are usually completely incorrect sizes or for wrong seasons and broken toys. All of this makes a lot of work for me. I'm already beyond the garbage allowance I can throw out at my apartment every week because of medical garbage so I have to pay to have this junk removed. Most of it is not good enough to donate anywhere and even then the sorting takes up time and energy I do not have. I can't feed the kids expired food or things they do not want to eat. I've asked her over and over again to stop bringing this shit but it continues. I'm just so sad and wish I had some support.
Not feeling excited..?
I am currently 37 + 2 and labour day is coming soon. I am not feeling very excited tbh, feel sad that my child free days are over, that my life will never be the same again and worrying that I’ll be a bad parent (and an anxious parent too).
I’ve been with my partner for 6 years, we own a house together and generally speaking we have a lot of support however I’m also concerned he isn’t growing up enough because of the support and dependency (from his family) and lack of maturity around what it’s actually going to be like having a baby. I fear he is too positive about it all and to be quite honest that really annoys me.
I’m not sleeping, I don’t feel supported and I am so uncomfortable in this heat. Ironically, the physical aspects of birth don’t worry me too much it’s just everything else!
Can someone please sense check me and tell me everything is going to be okay?!?
