Kindergarten

Any mom’s out there dealing with getting an IEP for their five year-old and having to wait 60 days for the process?

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Hi I’m an RBT usually they put behavioral students up first for ieps who require an aide because they are prioritized. If you son doesn’t have anything behavioral (not ADHD or learning disabilities) then he is going to be waiting until they complete the others.

There’s a few things district schools love to do and that’s excluding students who clearly need accommodations but the school won’t provide what’s needed. Talk to his teacher they can tell the higher ups he needs someone to be with him or in class to support them. They have that power to say the teacher doesn’t feel comfortable because the teacher can’t give all their attention to him which is putting eveyone at risk. I’ve seen it before where they push out students who they think are too difficult

You as the parent need to stand your ground and make some noise. Get him the help outside of school. The BCBA will advocate for him to these schools districts that want to say he’s too much. I’ve worked closely with student who are aggressive and non verbal and they have a very successful education due to early intervention services such as OT and in home Aba therapy through insurance. You’ll have to move schools or districts if they decide to suspend him and you can definitely sue for that. He could be having a hard time adjusting to school and they won’t know the difference.

It is wrong they actually can’t do that anymore. Calling parents and telling you to pick them up I’ve tried it during my worst behaviors and each time they just told me the student is there til the end of the day and to make it work. Try refusing once and tell them to figure it out. See what happens and that’s your answer. They are also required to provide an aide or some kind of safety person for your son during testing. I’ve seen students have a full aide just because the parent was bugging for one and all the staff know the student doesn’t need one. They can’t call the police if he’s not destructing or threatening to hurt him or anyone else. Believe me they are just telling you what they think they can get away with. Start emailing higher ups snd calling the board of education make it known that this school won’t accommodate.

It’s a hard process but youll be thankful later. I promise! He’s just beginning his education everything you do now matters later

in our community

Using family names, dilemma!

My father passed away when I was a child. We used his name as our son’s middle name as a way for him to be connected to baby. My mum was very happy with this and so were me and my partner. I will say that my father’s name isn’t particularly a name I would’ve chosen otherwise as it’s not to our taste but won us over sentimentally.

My FIL openly asked me and my husband the other day if we will be using his name as our second son’s middle name. We had no intention of doing this and have already chosen another middle name. The middle name we have chosen is actually my husbands and FILs middle name (they have the same). We thought this was a way to connect both my husband and FIL to baby boy no2. My FIL seemed annoyed and said “is my name not good enough?”.

I have no idea how to approach this subject anymore, especially when my in laws keeps asking if I have finalised a name and seem to be off in tone when discussing a name.

For reference, my husband is their only child and thus these are their only grandchildren.

Thanks for any help with this situation! I don’t want to upset anyone but also want our decisions to be respected.

Attention anti-screen time moms. How do we feel about nature channels?

Mostly On days where you can’t do anything outside without a heat stroke.

Question

So I recently became a SAHM and I'm just curious how things are divided in yalls household. I'm primary caregiver, make the food and clean the home. Husband just works and comes home. We recently had a almost 10 week old. And occasionally he will help with bath time and take her for a few mins of the day. But I physically don't get a break. Unless baby is sleeping and usually I have other things to do at that point. I deserve a break too. My husband takes mental breaks out of his work and even gets some hours completely to his self. I refuse to just accept that this is how it is.

17 and thinks she is grown

So today was my children’s first day back to school. My daughter who is 17 was telling me about the new rules at school in regards to cell phones. I told her I’ll call the school and give them a piece of my mind. Then she proceeded to call me in a nasty way a “fucking phyco”I calmly told her that she is being very disrespectful and I don’t appreciate it. Told my husband of 15 years what she said and he asked me if I was his child I said no then he said he is tired of being the referee between her and I. It’s only the first day of school and this is how we’re starting off. I’m so frustrated.

Husband seems uninterested in being a father or husband

Idk, this is just a rant because I have no friends or family to talk to or rant at.

My husband is so uninvolved and disinterested in the kids and even me.
When hes home he's either sleeping, outside smoking, or talking on/scrolling on his phone.
The kids try to get his attention and he'll ignore them, either completely or until they say papa like 7 times, and if he does answer them he does it in an annoyed way.
He never wants to play with them, and if he does it's on his terms, and he will criticize the kids/get kind of pissed off for wanting to play/act a bit crazy.
He's overly critical of everything, it seems lately he only criticizes and complains. He can't even wake up and just say good morning to everyone, he has to have a complaint right as he comes down. The bathroom garbage is full, the soap dispenser is empty, the walls in the hallway are dirty, one of the kids left clothes on their bedroom floor. Every single time he wakes up or comes home he has to have a complaint.
He also is the most picky eater, but denies he is, and will routinely not eat what I make for the kids or myself. Then complain theres nothing he likes in the house, but every time we go shopping I ask him if he wants anything specific, he says no. So I get things I know he likes in hopes he will eat it, but he will not sometimes. He only like 1 type of meat and its the most expensive one in the shops, so he doesn't want to spend the money on it, but then he will be upset when there's "nothing in the house for him to eat"

The one thing I expect him to do is bedtime, he's been doing it for years, but has gotten lazy with it. He wants to just go upstairs and sit on his phone until the youngest sleeps. He expects them to get ready for bed by themselves(5 and 8) without reminders and without help from him and in under like 5 minutes. Literally the older one will go into the bathroom and 10 seconds later he's yelling for them to hurry up and go to bed.
Or he decides to go out right before bedtime and just do nothing.

After bedtime he still just want to scroll his phone or talk to his friends on the phone. We're literally sitting outside together, I always put my phone down when he comes to sit with me so he knows I'm present and ready for interaction, but a lot lately he comes looking at his phone and remains looking at his phone, without even saying anything or looking at me. He will answer briefly if I say something, or try to mansplain things to me that I was talking about.
It feels like he just shits on the things I like. For example I like One Piece, I'm not obsessed but I really enjoy it and watch it every day when I'm cooking. He complains that I watch One Piece so much. One time he said "after you catch up with the current episodes thats enough" meaning I should stop watching it. Once I got to the current episodes, I started watching from the beginning again. I like to do puzzles and I make jewelry and he won't even sit in the same room with me while I do something. He doesn't like TV shows and only really likes war movies which I will sit though without complaining, but he will not sit through a movie I like without shitting on it in some way. My favourite movie he said was stupid and had no point. I stopped even wanting to try to watch something with him because he just makes me feel bad for liking the things I like.

He says he's fine, just stressed(he's been out of work for literally 5 years and is just dragging his ass now that he has to get a job)

Its sad when the guy next door has spent more time with the kids(he has a kid the same age as our youngest thats friends with my kids) in the past week than their father has. And any time he did spend with them he was not present, he was not fun, he was not happy, he was not playful, he was not engaged at all.

I feel like a robot, just doing what I have to do and not expecting anything from him except more hassle. This is a man who will ask me to call a bunch of auto shops for him looking for a car part instead of doing it himself.

Ok I'm tired of ranting now. I'ma go cry in the bathroom for a bit now.

Husband not saying hi to our baby

I get home, husband comes out to greet me. I grab our baby & put him in his stroller. I tell him I need to grab the diaper bag, he grabs it for me. The whole walk inside doesn’t even acknowledge our son, he even goes to the kitchen, doesn’t even touch him.. he goes to poop, I bring it up & he quickly defends himself. He uses the excuse that he had to poop & can’t control his bowel movements. As we’re walking in, I see him look over to the pretty neighbors house which I’m pretty sure I’ve caught him looking over there before. I try to believe that he’s not but how you just gonna glance in that one direction as we’re turning the corner. I kind of blow up when I tell him he didn’t acknowledge our baby, he gets mad interrupted his poop & opened the door & how I didn’t close the door. I told him he can close it himself, he slams the door.. then comes out & says he’s leaving. I said you can feed your son, he tells me not to talk to him & that he won’t be talked to that way. (4 weeks post partum btw)