My boyfriend is an addict, any advice or kind words?

I’m a ftm to an 8 month old girl in Canada. I’m still on maternity leave for now. My boyfriend, whom my daughter and I were living with, has relapsed multiple times since my daughter has been born (on fentanyl and other opioids) the worst time we left to my moms while he was continuously high for two weeks and ended up at a recovery facility, after many ultimatums from myself and his family. Since then, things have been pretty good, though only a couple short months. We got into counselling, have been trying to go out on dates, and just getting back to some normalcy, and I just felt like I had back my person. He was in recovery when we met, and I didn’t truly understand how bad this could get until after I got pregnant. Well, this weekend, he just relapsed again when I spent a night at my moms and in my hometown, seeing old friends and introducing them to my daughter (the first time I’ve been able to do this alone and stress free since we moved into the middle of nowhere for his job) I told him I’m not coming home. Now I’m struggling, grieving the life I know we could’ve had, and missing the person he is when he is sober, but he has continued to put myself and my daughter in compromising situations, and I can’t have her in a house with substances and with a mom who’s falling apart every other week. I told him I want a road back to where we can live together again and try to do this when he can provide safety for my daughter. So I called my job, asked to come off maternity leave early, and started talking to my financial advisor and lawyer about how I can best move forward. But now, im feeling guilty, guilty for going back to work early, guilty I left him, guilty I brought my daughter into this mess, guilty were staying at my moms, just so much guilt. I don’t know where to go from here, I don’t know if I’m being fair, I just don’t know what to do anymore. I feel like if I just keep going back, he’ll always think that what he’s done and is doing is forgivable and my boundaries are optional.

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ALL I CAN DO IS SEND YOU LOVE🫂🩵
PROTECT YOU AND THAT BABY STAY AWAY.....PLEASE.
SO MANY BAD THINGS CAN HAPPEN WHEN FOLKS KEEP GOING FROM SOBER TO NOT

Guilt and grief is very expected and normal for what you’re going through. Don’t beat yourself up and most importantly, don’t double back. Stay on the path. You made the best decision for you and your child. The best decision is usually the hardest one. I’m proud of you for making the right decision. Just stick to it, you got this. There’s a light at the end of the tunnel. And your daughter will appreciate your choices in the long run. Trust me!

You did the right thing for yourself and your daughter. Just focus on your child and yourself. Take this time to heal and grow. Give yourself time.

Sitting here tearing up because this was me 2 years ago. I was with the father of my oldest two children for 9 years on and off. He was a cocaine addict. I didn’t know he was in recovery when I met him, you’d think that would be something someone would’ve shared with me considering how bad things were before and then how badly they got.
The grief will eat you up, you’ll be back and forward and it’ll be nice for a little while again here and there but the substances will always win unless the addicts get professional help to stay off them.
One day I literally woke up and cut him off, left with my two children and haven’t looked back. Something in me just snapped and I was strong enough to start all over myself with my children.
Being a mum is the hardest job ever but it’s the most rewarding and those little people help heal us in ways we didn’t even know possible.
Stay strong whatever you decide but know you’re not alone. You can message me anytime lovely x

I’m so sorry you have to go through that. I have lots of family that struggles with addiction and it’s a very hard thing to watch your loved ones go down the wrong path. All I know from my experience is that you can only help them so much and it’s up to them to truly get clean. While you wait for them to get better you have to do what’s best for you

in our community

Can I get a script for this?? My son talks about his penis

I don't consider this sensitive topic but I toggled it on anyway just in case

My son woke up in the morning and usually take off his diaper wipe him down and put on his underwear

Yesterday morning he said look Mommy my penis is big because he had a morning erection I guess is what it was

And I said yes your body changes throughout the day and that's good noticing. Your body is healthy and strong

IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE I'M SUPPOSED TO SAY?!!!! LOL.

I am a single mom and sometimes I cry thinking I have to do it all by myself.. I have no idea where to bring this topic to

I'm worried and afraid that when the time comes I won't have the right perspective to respond like I'm supposed to

I'm open to ideas please or just a mindset for this kind of thing. I think I did okay but I don't always know what to say

I am the worst mom ever?

I have been giving my baby chicken liver and apple pate! This is literally his favourite! He is 10 months old now. I started since he was 7-8 months. The problem, I have more than 1-2 teaspoon per week. I tend to cook this once a week he has been having 2 ounces easily per week. I was reading about vitamin A Toxicity and I am worried that I was poisoning my son! 🥺

Going out to see friends?

What happens if you want to go out for dinner with a friend and Dad is at home with the two kids? (23months and 2months)

My partner has just said he doesn’t feel comfortable he can do bedtime whilst looking after both kids.

I feel this will impact me getting out the house as I can either see a friend 6-8:30pm or after 9pm (travel time not included). I’m currently on MAT so this is my only free time away from home without kids

Context: I see my two friends about once every 4-6 weeks. My partner said he needs a few more months to feel comfortable

What does everyone else do?

I dont know how to approach this... Info below

So I live with my sister and her bf. this is not our ideal situation, you might have seen other posts I made about this living situation. If you haven't just know that this is a temporary living situation but I do have to live here for another year. That being said, in the past they have horses dishes in their room. I try to give them grace because I'm 25, but when I was 17 living with my family I did the same thing. The thing is they are both 30+. So the fact that they are both stuck in this teenage mentality is actually infuriating especially when I have to do the dishes. Usually they will bring the dishes out and do them themselves but lately I think they are testing limits. My sister said "the dish washer was full and I had accidentally been hoarding forks so I just put them in the sink." That was maybe a week ago, I let it go cause it was just some forks. Now I'm caught up on dishes and I'm realizing we're low on plates and bowls. So now I'm irritated again. I don't know how to approach this. I think it is partially my fault as I'm dealing with 2 kids and the house by myself everyday, I typically end up leaving the dirty dishes for myself to do in the morning. So I do need to be better about that but I feel like they need to take some accountability because there's a lot of other times they can do their dishes. My sister just got fired for absences and she still hasn't come out to do her dishes. I need to be nice but I don't know how to approach this.

Finance issues

Is it ok to ask for child maintenance from my husband even if we live together etc…

My husband earns more than me, he pays our biggest bill but I still pay tons of bills to, including childcare all food shopping and if we go anywhere or do anything. I keep asking for him to contribute that I’m constantly struggling to cover everything but he just makes up and excuse or lies about his money or bills. He doesn’t even pay the bills on time or just doesn’t pay, I constantly have to bail him out and never get it all back. he’s lying again about money and it just seems like my money is the family money and his money is his to do what he wants. I brought it up with him again this week and he told me he wasn’t contributing anything towards summer break as I choose to take the children out so I should cover the cost. He constantly pays for nothing and everything falls on me, I can never just have my money I have to make sure it covers everything. I just want him to contribute towards our children but he doesn’t pay for clothes toys outings nothing I’ve had enough
We’re trying to save for a house but everyone I ask him to save any money for this he tells me I’m controlling him

Does it get better?

My son is 2 months and it’s just been really hard I feel like I have no break and when I ask for help I feel like I’m just inconveniencing everyone and I’m so beyond stressed from other things that my body hurts and feels weak and I always have headaches, no matter how much I rest I feel like I can barely hold my son just to burp him and yes I do have a husband but he’s constantly working and is barely even home and he can’t take off but does it get better when they get older?