Partner broke up after 6 years and a 15 month old baby
My fiance (yes we were engaged) eft me last night. He ended our 6 year relationship and told me he doesn't love me anymore and can't stay with me just for the sake of baby.
I haven't slept all night I'm heartbroken and devastated and feel so blindsided as we wasn't even arguing at the time.
I feel sick with anxiety about the future and what this will look like for me and 15 month old. We're not married so I don't think I have many rights. I worried about my finances and losing our home etc.
Not to mention the loss of what I thought was my forever love.
It was out the blue but said he's hasn't been happy for months.
I'm broken. I genuinely thought we were in a good place.
I don't know what to do, I can't stop crying and I just want to get happy and 100% for my son
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All I can suggest is that if u haven't already is to claim universal credit as it will top you up based on your wages. And make sure ur ex pays child maintenance. I only know this because my parents divorced when I was 2 and a half . And its his loss
Do you have a mortgage together? He'd need to keep paying into that
From what i know, in uk, even if you aren't married, if you've been together for at least 5 years and you can prove it, in the eyes of authorities you were as married, so you should have some rights (which is why i believe many couples in uk just never get married and just live happily ever after).
I don't think you're without rights at all. He deffo should be held accountable and pay child maintenance.
And don't cry over him for one second. You didn't lose anything. I am sure the right person waits for you. It will be hard as hell but you will. Make it
So sorry to hear you are going through this. I think that if ypu have lived together as a couple for a certain amount of time, maybe 5 years but i'm not sure, from a legal point they treat it like a civil partnership. I would speak to citizens advice but i'm sure you do have some rights. X
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Partner broke up after 6 years and a 15 month old baby
My fiance (yes we were engaged) eft me last night. He ended our 6 year relationship and told me he doesn't love me anymore and can't stay with me just for the sake of baby.
I haven't slept all night I'm heartbroken and devastated and feel so blindsided as we wasn't even arguing at the time.
I feel sick with anxiety about the future and what this will look like for me and 15 month old. We're not married so I don't think I have many rights. I worried about my finances and losing our home etc.
Not to mention the loss of what I thought was my forever love.
It was out the blue but said he's hasn't been happy for months.
I'm broken. I genuinely thought we were in a good place.
I don't know what to do, I can't stop crying and I just want to get happy and 100% for my son
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4
Husband spanking toddler
So as the title states my husband spanked our 3 year old 7 times yesterday because she had a fit about getting out of the bath and telling him no. I was across the house but heard the spanking so I ran to where they were and told him to stop.
She has been testing her boundaries a lot this week which for the most part I have been able to handle and explain why certain things canāt go certain ways. I stay at home all week and he usually is home Sundays to play with them otherwise itās me from the moment they wake up until right before they go to bed.
He woke up in a crappy mood due to a headache and I took both kids to the playground and made breakfast etc while he slept in.
When I stopped him and told him to get away from her he stomped off and I put on a little show while I went to talk to him. (This is the third time Iāve caught him spanking her and we have discussed it even before Iāve witnessed it)
He just sat there looking off into space and ignored everything I said and then said that clearly what Iām doing isnāt working for her ādefianceā. This instance has left a terrible taste in my mouth. I am not sure what to do now. My daughter was terrified of him for the rest of the day and didnāt want to see him. I slept in my kids room with both of them last night and havenāt talked since yesterday to him after trying to talk and him not acknowledging his wrongdoing.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Also my family is all 1000 miles away and we live near his family. Iām close with my MIL but this is her son.
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To go to a wedding or not?
Advice needed, my husband and I went to a wedding this weekend. The whole experience was extremely stressful I think our 3 1/2 month old baby just got very very overstimulated and so spent most of the time crying and screaming and was very hard to settle. She also hates being in the car so the journey there and back was also very difficult. It was important that we went to the wedding though because it was my husband sisterās wedding, tomorrow we have another family wedding and Iām really undecided on whether to go or not thereās no overnight stay so it will just be for the day. Itās about two hours each way lots of family will be there. Part of me thinks I should just power through and she may be ok, also most of his family hasnāt met the baby yet. ā¦Give it my best go because it would be nice to see everyone and maybe sheāll do well but my experience this weekend has suggested to me that it might be a really really stressful experience. Iām also concerned because I donāt know if there are any quiet spaces where Iāll be able to take her if she is getting overstimulated do you think I should go or not?
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Is anyone weaning their babies?
My baby is showing all the signs and capable of holding her head up. Iām thinking of maybe just giving her some porridge of a morning. Would this be weird to just give her porridge for ābreakfastā whilst sheās not 6m as I feel because sheās not yet I donāt want to full wean.
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I have no clue what to do now I need advice (long post)
So, I have 2 year old son he started daycare today and I had to pick him up after 4 hours because he hits and throws things and I donāt know what to do.
Weāve gone to mommy and me events and he does pretty good.
BUT heās been to nursery at church and we ended up in like āprobationā to where I had to sit with him in nursery for a few Sundays until he started behaving well again. Well, Today was the same thing except they just said he may be better off somewhere with less kids. Which I completely understand. Iām not mad at them I almost expected this to happen and was already looking for places that have ratios with less kids.
The teacher said he does so good on his own and is so smart, but was throwing his metal cup at kids and scratching them which I feel terrible about but unfortunately did not surprise me as this was very similar to what happened in nursery and at the last daycare we were supposed to get accepted to.
Now, I just have no idea how to go about this. He doesnāt really misbehave when Iām around. So itās hard for me to address these behaviors real time.
When he does stuff like this around me
-I get to his eye level and basically call him out
-I give him stimulation to calm him down by gently squeezing his fingers, hands, and arms (I do this because it has helped me me personally growing up) if he seems overwhelmed or overstimulated(which includes over excitement), I believe this may be the primary culprit
-if he has thrown something I take it away and tell him heās done because at this point we both know when itās a behavioral thing or overstimulation - heās smart he knows he canāt do that and only does it when others are around.
-second time I pick him up and change scenery. This normally does the trick immediately, but I like to give him a chance to self-correct (I donāt know if thatās the exact term to use)
Heāll sometimes attempt to bite me (not other kids,that I know of) but as soon as I tell him āno bitingā he will grab whatever he was about to bite (i.e my hand) and kiss it and caress it like saying āI wasnāt going to mom, I was going to be sweet and lovingā again, heās smart.
Thing is he is very behind on cognitive development scale for his age because he doesnāt not talk much. Iām scared because I think that the cause of all of this may be the abuse I went through by his father and him witnessing the parts I could not shield him from. He already is set to have a psychological evaluation soon. Heās been evaluated for ST, PT and OT and is on track to be taking them as soon as they become available(ST tomorrow). And he is in child developmental therapy currently.
Iām a single mom and now Iām feeling defeated because I have no idea how to help my son understand this right and wrong thing. The thing is this behavior is usually not even malicious. It seems and I have been told that it seems more due to maybe being overstimulated.
P.S. Before anyone tries to give me sympathy, while I appreciate it, I would love more than anything to keep this about my son and how to best mother/parent him in this situation. Iām in therapy and doing my best to move past the trauma! Thank you in advance!! š¤
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10 month food regression?? Advice needed
Looking for some advice/reassurance from other boy mums ā¤ļø - Iām a first time mum FYI
My little boy is 10 months old and weāve hit a bit of a feeding regression and Iām honestly starting to worry.
He used to be a really good eater and would happily have blended meals, yogurts, porridge, fruits etc etc . Heās always managed with chunkier/lumpy foods really well.
Over the last few days, though, he has suddenly started gagging really badly at foods ā and whatās confusing me is that itās actually happening more with smoother foods that he used to love, like yoghurt. Sometimes he gags to the point of vomiting. At the moment the main thing heāll eat is porridge but thatās becoming an issue too and refusing. Heāll pick at some finger foods but isnāt eating much.
Heās also recently had a cold/virus, so Iām wondering if that could be affecting things? Heās still breastfeeding really well, has wet nappies and solid and is otherwise okay.
The thing Iām worrying about most is that Iām now back at work and heās at nursery 3 days a week. Iām not able to breastfeed him during the day while Iām working and I canāt get much from pumping like I used to. so Iāve bought some ready-made Aptamil bottles for nursery days as a backup in case he wants/needs milk while heās there.
I know milk is still really important at this age and Iām not expecting him to eat huge amounts, but because heās suddenly eating so little food from being a really good eater and obviously isnāt getting his usual breastfeeds while Iām at work, Iām worrying that heās not getting enough overall.
Has anyone else had a similar phase around 9ā10 months, especially after being poorly? Did it pass? Would you keep offering lots of different foods alongside the porridge or just stick with what theyāre accepting for a little while?
If it is a regression please let me know if any tips/advice š
Any advice or reassurance would be massively appreciated because Iām probably overthinking everything šā¤ļø
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