Tomorrow is my last (solo) day with my baby before they start nursery next week and then I am back to work full time shortly after. To say I am struggling would be an understatement. I cannot stop crying, and I've been crying non stop for the last few weeks. I'm not ready to be away from my baby, especially 5 long days a week. My baby isn't 100% at the minute due to a lingering cold and cutting 2/3 teeth. Last settle session today before starting on Monday and I get a call to pick up early as my baby is so upset. I turn up, my baby takes one look at me and starts screaming and is so distraught, genuinely was so distressing seeing my baby like that. I just broke down on the nursery doorstep, the staff had to console me. I got home and I sobbed the hardest I think I've ever sobbed.
This isn't my first rodeo going back to work, my eldest is nearly 5 and it was of course difficult going back to work but I am struggling so much this time. When I went back full time after my first, they were cared for by my mum 5 days a week so it was easier on the both of us. I know this nursery, my first went there for over 2 years but it is just so different my baby going to nursery compared to my 2 year old. Plus, this year has flown by and I can honestly say, I have loved it so much, I don't want this period of my life to end.
And then when I am back to work, my first, who started school in September, will be in wraparound care everyday. The GUILT I am feeling over both my babies having such long days, being cared for by other people is more than I can cope with.
And to top it off, my flexible working request was rejected and I am now in the appeal process so I am going back with that added stress of going through the appeal, working alongside my manager who rejected my request and definitely won't be happy I'm appealing, whilst doing my original work pattern which is an added strain going back.
I am so run down and exhausted from all the crying and the continuous level of stress and anxiety running through my body. I am struggling to eat as I feel sick to my stomach, I can't sleep as my mind is in overtime all the time and my house is a mess as I don't want to spend a single moment these last weeks on anything that isn't spending time with my baby.
Long old post and very impressed if anyone is still here but I really needed to get that off of my chest đ
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I am so sorry that you going through this. I quit my job after going back when my first was 9 months as the work was just horrendous, long hours, lots of pressure from manager. I managed to stay at home with him until 18months with few side gigs here and there/ savings and then I found a remote job that helped immensely. ( got made redundant and went back to another hybrid role). I am going back gradually until December but after that if they refuse my flexible working, bye bye, i rather a lower paying job but flexible!
What you are feeling is absolutely valid and I really hope you will find the courage to deal with this new chapter of your life. Your baby will eventually adapt to nursery and find your groove, it is your absolute right to request flexible working so hopefully that works out if not, you can always look for another job xx

I feel the same... my little girl has her nursery settles next week then will be going full time the week after. I am back at work the week after that....
I am not ready.
My LO has never been away from me or her dad since shes been born. She has massive stranger anxiety and I just cant cope with how upset she will be. The settles fall over he nap times too so she is going to be a nightmare next week if her sleep is all over the place. I am just not looking forward to being apart from her.
My husband doesnt get it... hes not very emotional or compassionate at the best of times.
I am just hoping she will be settled by Christmas so can enjoy a nice happy Christmas break together.
It so hard going back to work so I totally understand where you are coming from

My little one started at nursery at the beginning of September. Exactly like you, massive guilt around leaving her with people she doesnât know, she hasnât know anyone else to care for her since she was born except me and her dad and she has lots of separation anxiety. My husband and I are feeling it hard at the min and both struggling with it!
But⊠today was the first time she went into nursery and didnât cry!! I was so proud of her! So weâre getting there with the settling. Itâs going to be a while still but making little steps of progress everyday. Feel free to message me, I know what this feels like, itâs just the worst!!
With added mini soya chunks and sweetcorn

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I just feel so fucking agitated at the moment. I have 2 under 2 and one of them is autistic. So we have daily meltdowns etc. I'm up at 6am every day and don't sit down till maybe 10pm. I'm doing absolutely everything for them & the only break I get is going to the gym but I'm out for an hour max. As soon as I'm home I'm straight back at it, I don't even have time to shower.
My partners great but I don't think he has any fucking idea just how hard it is being with 2 small kids every minute of the day, managing appointments & the house. I'm starting to resent him. I'm snappy & miserable.
I resent my dog. He stinks & keeps malting everywhere. He's old so keeps shitting in the house.
The kids have kicked off for me all morning, yet as soon as he's here its calm & I look dramatic.
I'm not enjoying being a mum cos I can't cope with the constant stress. I've got adhd and autism so I'm overstimulated very quickly.
I've had ENOUGH.
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Im so frustrated because it seems like all my fiance can do is grab at my body and try to f*ck 24/7 like can they ever talk about anything else?! Its making me not want to be around him anymore.

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So, my boyfriend and I have a son together.and usually he doesnât mind buying him things he needs like diapers and wipes etcâŠbut recently he wonât get him anything that he needs. So when my son runs out we end up in an argument and he gets upset that he has to leave at 3 in the morning to get whatever it is my son needs when I told him days before he was almost out. I would get them myself but he doesnât let me work because âhe wants to take care of his familyâ. What should I do or say?
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My husband has an issue with me wearing sexy undies to work. Yesterday, I wore a thong for the first time in years because I'm just tired of my panty line showing đ and oh my gosh he was very unhappy. He says that if he's not happy about it then I wouldn't do it. I should wear it at home. He says things like " men can tell I'm wearing a thong. " I don't respect him because I wear it to work, and he does not like etc. I just can't believe that it bothers him so much. I told him if I feel the need to wear it outside the house I will. It's not every time I want my panty line showing. I literally have less than 4 thongs, and only one Yesterday in years. No one sees under my clothes, so what's the issue. Please give me some advice on this? Who's wrong in this situation?
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What snack ideas would you have for a 19 month old that will keep her entertained on a 9 hour flight and will fit in these little compartments? Will take more of course.

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