in

Moms in their 30’s

Am I justified in being upset?

Hi,

So my bestie, lets call her Bea, just bought an apartment. I am so happy for her. Apparently she thinks she only has like 30 daysnto move on her something (she confused me).

So, on Sunday the two of us, my son, 3 of our friends and the son of one of those friends are going to an exhibit of sorts. I have booked a table at a cafe. Bea said she may not be able to come but refused to confirm her other plans with her mums and waited til she was contacted instead.

Annoying but fine. She said she can come.

Then she booked something with her Mum on the Saturday. Not an issue.

Over the weekend she called me and told me about the apartment and said her Mum isn't comfortable/able to drive at night so is staying atbhers Saturday night. No issue, why would it be.

Then apparently because her Mum is staying she has decides on cancelling with us because her Mum is going to help her pack.

This is annoying and has upset me. It feels she is unneccessarily cancelling on us. I also texted an floated the idea of me and/or our friends helping after our catch up on Sunday. She never responded.

Also, we caught up last week but due to issues with childcare (I need someone close by for my son in case preschool called. It was his first day back after surgery) we had to re jig our original plans and agreed if she wasn't going away we would do something Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday this week as that is when I am kiddo free.

She was in communicado yesterday and I was up the coast but was home by like 10:30.

She has also been incommunicado today.

I texted her asking if we were doing anything and she asked of I had any thoughts and about childcare. I said no and he was in preschool so it was all good. She then hasn't responded further.

Also we agreed to catch up on Friday and she knew I was catching a train up the coast at around 1pm. I reached out and she didn't respond til 11:30. I had to say that she knew I was on a schedule and then she said lets cancel. She mentioned she had been on heaps of phone calls. I found out later it was about buying the house. Would a text have killed her though?

Prior to that we had agreed on plqns and she was going to pick me up. She texted when she was meant to be leaving and aaid ahe was helping her flat mate with their smoke alarm. Then she was late and said her Dad rang. She frequently talks through the car so could have driven and talked like she always does.

A few weeks ago we had planned to go apartment huntong togethwr because I couldn't go the previous weekend. Booked it in for Saturday and on the Friday night as we are saying goodbye after trivia, she mentions maybe doing somethinf on Sunday. I asked about Saturday and she said her Mum was coming up and she was going with her.

Anyway, I am upset that she seems to be consistently ditching me, late as she has chosen to do other things, that she has chosen to ditch our catch up because her Mum is staying over. It feels like she juat doesn't care sometimes.

She sees her Mum frequently, was there on the weekend and stayed over saturday night and will be seeing her all of next Saturday.

A lot of our plans she either has done or is doing with her Mum. It's hard to book things with her because she is constantly doing things with her Mum.

When I started dating my partner she had issues becaise I prioritised him a bit and I wasn't as available. Same when I got other friends (no longer friends with them for reasons unrelated to Bea) and spend a bunch of time with them.

Then same thing when I had my kiddo.

We talked about it many times and I took it on board and tried to make our friendship a bit more of a priority.

Now I feel like I have to fight for us to hang out.