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First time mums

Aggressive behaviour at reception 4 years old

I can’t wrap my head around it maybe I don’t want to believe it I just I don’t know if I’m crazy or not.

My toddler is 4 years she started reception this September. She’s an only child and it’s her first school setting full. She’s always been home with me since birth. She’s never been away from me 5 days a week 8 hours a day. She started full time with no transition.

For 6 weeks I thought she was getting on fine because she’s always happy to go to school she always cries because she’s wants me to take her to school!

At drop off and pick ups I’ve seen her teacher teaching assistants and the primary school supervisor at the gates and in all these times they’ve never pull me aside or made me aware of anything on a few occasions the teaching assistants would tell me she had a wonderful day.

My toddler is very emotional in the sense she gets upset quickly if she doesn’t want to do something or she’s being told no. She’ll get fussy teary but that’s about it. Either she settles or she moves on with another activity.

Now school has told me that ever since she started up to now October 22nd she’s been very aggressive with the adults at school. I mean they said they’ve reported 17 incidents and I haven’t be made aware of none of them from the onset. Apparently she kicks the adults the slaps the teacher in the face she hits the dinner staff and they are concerned?

I’ve never seen such behaviour at home or at soft plays of at local parks. I’ve seen the staff all this time and nobody has even told me anything from the first incident. At least after the 5th or 10th at most I should have been made aware if it was that concerning? Why wait till 17 and corner and force me into believing this?

I have a hard time to believe it because she’s not aggressive at home or at school. She loves going to school. Teacher said she doesn’t hit the children but apparently she hits a big grown adult?

I don’t know if I’m crazy but there’s just too much not adding up and I have a hard time to believe my child is doing this to adults for the past 6 weeks. They are forcing me into referral and things and not even explaining properly what the referral entails just we need your consent we need your consent.

Am I overreacting? Am I crazy having a hard time to believe it?
Apparently in football club she had such a bad reaction the club staff wanted to call me to pick her up and guess what nobody called me on that day and when I picked up her the staff smiled at me and didn’t inform me if it was really bad wouldn’t they have said at least a word??

It’s my first time dealing with a school and it’s now adding me stress on top of my work.