I need some advice , my baby dad is threating to get legal involved as he wants rights as the father. Baby is not born yet not until march. I have a 2 year old son (not heās) and have had full custody of him since he was born. i have said i donāt want my the unborn dad on birth certificate or the baby to have heās last name due to wanting both kids to have mine (we are not married) . The stuff heās saying itās like itās heās way or no way told me i canāt breastfeed and wants to take the baby for 2 hours every weekend when heās born i said no not until heās 4/5 months and not on boob. Heās a ex alcoholic and pretty sure he still drinks and suffers bad with bpd and ADHD i just feel like im in a loop what i do. Do i block him on everything and just see if he takes me to court or try and be civil which dont work because he plays the victim
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GIVE BIRTH ALONE DON'T TELL HIM WHEN YOU'RE GOING INTO LABOR
WHY CAUSE YOU CAN SIGN THE BC WITHOUT HIM WHICH WILL MAKE IT HARDER FOR HIM TO HAVE ACCESS AND YOU FILE FOR FULL CUSTODY DUE TO HIS PREVIOUS DRINKING ISSUES AND THE FACT HE WON'T LET YOU BE A MOM CAUSE TELLING YOU NOT TO BREAST FEED IS WILD.

Start collecting evidence !

Well just state that his mental disorder and his alcohol habit requires him to have supervised visitation

Iām guessing youāre in the U.K. in which case:
1. You donāt have to put him on the birth certificate
2. 100% DO NOT give your baby his surname
3. Make notes and keep evidence just in case it is needed for family court
The thing is, despite all the above, he is the childās father and your child will one day want to know them. So in that respect, unless there is abuse involved, itās always best to try and remain amicable co-parents.
If heās stressing you out whilst you are pregnant, I would send him one message and let him know youāre not about to put up with any nonsense and that you are going to block him. Then let him know your solicitor will be in touch with him after babyās birth regarding visitation and any child maintenance payments etc.
In the meantime, you do need to find a solicitor who will help with this. His no breastfeeding delusions are exactly that. You feed baby however you like. No judge is going to seperate a mum from her newborn.

Theres nowhere a judge is sending a newborn away from their mom like that. Say to him the baby is not born yet, we will make contact arrangements when the baby is born but until then theres nothing more to discuss as you are causing me a great deal of stress and threatening to take the baby and making demands already. Im pretty sure he cant apply until baby is born to court and by the time it goes to court baby wouldnt be newborn. I would be mostly concerned about the alcohol. March is a way off yet, block him until then for your own sanity. The time and space may make everything calm down and may even make him realise he needs to back off and come back with a calmer approach
We had the most wonderful relationship he was my best friend we communicate so well he was my heart and home you could never have told me this would be the way my life was gonna turn. He made me feel adored and gave me everything I needed and wanted. We were the couple goals to all our friend. I truly believed our love was like no other. We bused to joke about cheating and make up fake scenarios to laugh at.
I stopped working when I was 3 months pregnant and was living in his family home while we were waiting for our apartment to be ready. We got married on the 12th April 2025 after being together 3 1/2 years on the 12th April 2026 he sent a girl money for the morning after pill. ( she sent me the screenshot)
I was 8 months pregnant when she ācame to me as a womanā my entire world stopped.
He started cheating in January. They worked together. To my knowledge it happened twice. The second time is when she apparently got bitter because he ādidnāt want to continueā which made her feel unwanted idk⦠all I I could think at the time is I could have made a choice. She knew about me, he knew, people at his work knew. I left the house straight away for about two weeks but moved back as I couldnāt be away from everything I needed especially being so pregnant. Itās torture needing the person who caused you the heart ache. Iāve never in my life cried so much or felt such depths of pain. He destroyed my reality completely.
Heās very remorseful and i do believe he regrets it but too little too late. Heās one of those ā who donāt listen must feelā type of people. He tries daily to make things okay I just canāt get with the programme. I was such a lover girl but now can barely even look at him for too long. The only thing I can see is them two together. I already know ultimately I have to put an end to it I just donāt know why I canāt do it yet. Our baby is nearly 3 months old Iām sure Iāll be able to cope on my own and co- parent. Iām just so scared.
He didnāt think of me, heās proven he didnāt love me the way he said, he ruined my safety my security he made sooooo many choices he could have stopped in order to cheat. I will never feel safe again. Iād rather eat a Jean jacket than trust a man again. I would do anything for a little memory loss.
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Hey šš¾ I'm 34yrs young, looking to find mommy friends on this new journey as a first time mom. My son is 3 months old

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Hello!
Im 35 and looking for a friend that loves to laugh! Enjoys fantasy...lol I have two children, a 10 year old and a 13 year old. Definitely a new phase of motherhood and I would love to find someone going or is in that phase too or not...lol Im new to this place and trying to figure it out š

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Has anyone else been in this situation with Statutory Paternity Pay (SPP)?
Iām hoping someone might have some advice or have experienced something similar, because weāre honestly at a bit of a loss about what to do next. ā¹ļø
My partner and I are expecting our first baby in January. Weāve been told this week that his application for Statutory Paternity Pay (SPP) has been rejected because he notified his employer of his intention to take paternity leave slightly later than the required deadline.
This is all incredibly new to us as first-time parents. Sadly, we were completely unaware of this deadline. Had we known about it, he would have made sure to apply in good time.
There were also personal circumstances surrounding why we waited to notify his employer, including a high-risk pregnancy and wanting to wait until we felt more reassured before sharing our news. This wasnāt a decision weād taken lightly.
Weāve appealed the decision twice now, explained our circumstances and asked for some consideration, but the employer has confirmed that their decision remains unchanged.
He has been granted the leave but not the pay. He would have to take unpaid leave or use his accrued holiday allowance. Unfortunately, we cannot afford for him to take unpaid leave, and he will not have accrued enough holiday by January.
What makes things particularly frustrating is that one of his colleagues in the exact same situation as us was granted SPP despite notifying late. Weāre struggling to understand why our circumstances havenāt been considered in the same way, especially as no explanation has been provided.
- Has anyone successfully challenged an employerās refusal of SPP due to late notification?
- Is there any way to appeal further or have the decision independently reviewed?
- Can paternity pay be claimed through the Jobcentre or DWP instead?
- Are there any other benefits, grants or financial support available to help cover the loss of income during paternity leave?
Weāre not looking to take advantage of anything. We just want my partner to be able to spend those first precious days with his newborn son without us having to worry quite so much about the financial impact.
Any advice or personal experiences would be massively appreciated. ā¤ļø
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As a SAHM, how often do you leave the house (with or w/o kids) and also how often do you get "self care"/alone time? What do you do during that time & for how long?
After 4 years of being a SAHM and maybe a handful of times (1hr or less each time) of having time to myself, im looking to prioritize time for myself because Im feeling the negative effects and just want to be a happier mom. I only leave the house once a week to go grocery shopping with my husband and kids which is also quite overwhelming.
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I need some advice , my baby dad is threating to get legal involved as he wants rights as the father. Baby is not born yet not until march. I have a 2 year old son (not heās) and have had full custody of him since he was born. i have said i donāt want my the unborn dad on birth certificate or the baby to have heās last name due to wanting both kids to have mine (we are not married) . The stuff heās saying itās like itās heās way or no way told me i canāt breastfeed and wants to take the baby for 2 hours every weekend when heās born i said no not until heās 4/5 months and not on boob. Heās a ex alcoholic and pretty sure he still drinks and suffers bad with bpd and ADHD i just feel like im in a loop what i do. Do i block him on everything and just see if he takes me to court or try and be civil which dont work because he plays the victim
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