How to you cope with resentment towards your partner?
Im deep in the resentment phase towards my husband who’s always busy with work and gone from the home nearly 14 hrs a day. When he is home, he isn’t present, on his phone or out smoking. and still needs to be told what I need help with rather than just figuring it out for himself. Our baby is 9 months old and I feel like a single parent rather than having him parenting alongside me. He’s never home for bedtime or morning routines and im exhausted from the physical and mental load of caring for the baby plus all the home care things like meals, laundry, cleaning, etc. I go back to work in Feb and I just don’t understand how the entire house won’t fall apart without me home 24/7.
Anyone been through something similar? This mama is exhausted, resentful and honestly, a little lonely.
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Wonder how he would respond if you wrote him this as a letter
I leave mine with him even if it’s just to watch tv while I clean the kitchen or do laundry . Mine is a trucker and works long hours too
I mean you kinda gotta expect that when he doesn’t have much wind down time after work to then contribute towards the family and be present. There isn’t much work life balance which is unfair and with our economy now thats how it now.
Is this just who is normally without work or with less work? We need to understand we cannot have both as hard as that is. There are men that do a better job at both but you cannot expect a man to be fully present with his family when he’s mostly at work it’s one or the other usually. And how is he when he’s on leave or around Christmas if he gets some tome off is he more happy to contribute then?
Can he cut back some work hours around the time you go back to work to try and contribute more around the house?
It is completely normal and understandable why you feel this way, we need all the help we can get. It takes a village x
Maybe some counciling around this could help you with the thoughts and feelings around this too.
Are you able to ask him to take the baby on his day off so you can have some time to yourself? Im in the same spot as you, and I FINALLY got a night to myself out with friends and it truly made a world of difference to just feel like a human again and not feel so resentful. I just told my husband ahead of time that I would be gone and I was tagging him in, I didn't ask for it. You can't run on fumes forever you deserve to have a chance to relax too. He can play on his phone or go smoke after the baby is in bed, his priorities need a little straightening
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Do I report to the police?
Guys need advice - My neighbours making life incredibly difficult lately. He keeps climbing his ladder to look over into my garden — it makes me feel so watched and uncomfortable, especially with my two little ones playing out there. He keeps going on the ladder to question my builders while they're working. He climbs then bangs on my windows with a broom …
Today he banged so hard my kids started screaming !! , I went out and he was moaning about noise when it was just my washing machine finishing its cycle this was at 2pm!He also keeps calling the council to report me about my extension, so I think he climbs over to actually take pictures as well . There’s a
bit of mess rn while we're having work done — things that are literally none of his business.
But I feel like since i went over to try to talk to him at his door things have gotten worse ! he didn’t even open the door so I just wrote him a letter as I just want peace .
I explained to him I don’t like him climbing over and still he climbed over!
He also came on to my property and painted my fence at the front of my door without my permission still I said nothing as his a older man . But I honestly feel like theirs more to this now his Greek Cypriot and my partners Turkish Cypriots and the Greeks hate the Turkish Cypriots so I feel like his actually racist and just trying to bully us. Do I call the police?
I’ve already emailed the council but I’m not sure what they can even do as his bought his house. But why does that mean it’s okay for him to paint my property fence ? Or constantly climb the fence. He also went to his back garden to sharpen some tools after the argument and also told my partner to come closer to the fence 😭when he had a broom in his hand .
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Feel like a single mum.
So this is gonna be a long vent I am so sorry 😅
So I have 3 boys my oldest is 4 and he has a different dad to my current partner who I have 2 boys ages 2 and 1. My oldest sees his dad mostly every Sunday. And that’s a whole other story 😅
My partner just now is not working. He quit his job due to bad mental health in January and hasn’t worked since. Since then he and I have went through MAP bankruptcy due to him not working thus us not being able to afford payments to things (I took loans etc out on his behalf also) He doesn’t have a bank account and his money goes into my account. All money comes in and out of my account. So I am the ones whose responsible for EVERYTHING. Which is fine but I feel he has no sense of like money. 😅 Anyways as well as me being responsible for all the bills I also am the one who takes the boys to EVERYTHING. School/nursery runs and pick ups? Me. Doctors or dentist appointments? Me. My middle boy has been diagnosed with Developmental Delay so it’s me taking him to appointments for that. I also had to take him on public transport an hour away when he was a baby up till now as he was born with one functioning kidney… that was all me I had to do that he refused. Shopping trips I need to take the boys. Family events I need to take the boys. He doesn’t come along for ANYTHING. I try and take the boys out and do fun things like on a Saturday but it’s hard and I’m so exhausted but I do it y’know? Housework is all on me too. I work within school hours as I work in the school kitchen so he has the 1 year old whilst I’m at work but he naps usually so it’s
Not like he’s doing a lot then. And will not even do a single dish in the sink. He also refused to call the nursery when my middle son was unwell to let them know he wasn’t going to be going in…. So I had to call on the walk up to my eldest school.
I am just feeling really frustrated and lonely. I get asked when I’m in public “awk you a single mum” “you’ve got your hands full” and honestly it feels like it…
I have tried to tell him before how I feel but he just blames his mental health and makes me feel bad for being a bit upset about it all.
I have been falling asleep on the couch on purpose cos I just need a break when the boys go to bed and if I go upstairs I just feel I can’t relax. I’m so on edge it’s wild. Anything and everything that goes wrong is my fault too. Our tumble dryer broke and that was my fault as I put something infront of it and it overheated. The washing machine is on its last legs (I’ve had it for 6 years) and that’s my fault too. In the mornings I wake up with the boys get them ready and sorted and sort the youngest out too and wake him up at 8:30am before I’m about to leave to take the boys to school/nursery and genuinely he acts like a teenager when I wake him up. He is Constantly playing this daft game on his pc/phone. He’s 28 years old. We have been out together once this year to the cinema and he didn’t even want to go and wanted to leave it. Which I mean hurt Ngl but I know that was due to his MH but he went and like I tried to make the most of our time together.
I don’t really know the point of this vent is but I just am really at my breaking point. And feel so alone.
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How to you cope with resentment towards your partner?
Im deep in the resentment phase towards my husband who’s always busy with work and gone from the home nearly 14 hrs a day. When he is home, he isn’t present, on his phone or out smoking. and still needs to be told what I need help with rather than just figuring it out for himself. Our baby is 9 months old and I feel like a single parent rather than having him parenting alongside me. He’s never home for bedtime or morning routines and im exhausted from the physical and mental load of caring for the baby plus all the home care things like meals, laundry, cleaning, etc. I go back to work in Feb and I just don’t understand how the entire house won’t fall apart without me home 24/7.
Anyone been through something similar? This mama is exhausted, resentful and honestly, a little lonely.
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Is it bad I haven’t taken my 5 month old to any classes?
I haven’t done any classes since he was born, is that bad?
He’s seeing his grandparents on both sides once a week, we do a lot at home with him for his development and seems to be developing well.
I’m working and socialising with him so taking him to see other mum friends with babies and to see people so not like I’m not out the house with him.
Just seems like everyone I know is doing lots of classes.
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Weaning But i only want comments from those who relate, No critical comments thank you
Hi everyone, Who’s started weaning at 5 months? And who can give me some advice?
My baby is incredibly hungry, He’s also on hydrolysed formula. For the last 5 months it’s been really awful, He screams 24/7 like he’s in pain or super hungry. i can’t give him an extra milk because he’s already on an extra ounce every bottle anyways, He’s feeding every 3 hours
What did you mummas do?
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My two year old wants to be carried everywhere
She’s refusing sitting in her pram and there’s always tears and a battle to get her back in. Some days I choose just to leave the pram at home but she just insists on being carried and throws tantrums until I have to pick her up just so we can go along with our day.
Any tips?
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