Feel like a single mum.

So this is gonna be a long vent I am so sorry 😅

So I have 3 boys my oldest is 4 and he has a different dad to my current partner who I have 2 boys ages 2 and 1. My oldest sees his dad mostly every Sunday. And that’s a whole other story 😅

My partner just now is not working. He quit his job due to bad mental health in January and hasn’t worked since. Since then he and I have went through MAP bankruptcy due to him not working thus us not being able to afford payments to things (I took loans etc out on his behalf also) He doesn’t have a bank account and his money goes into my account. All money comes in and out of my account. So I am the ones whose responsible for EVERYTHING. Which is fine but I feel he has no sense of like money. 😅 Anyways as well as me being responsible for all the bills I also am the one who takes the boys to EVERYTHING. School/nursery runs and pick ups? Me. Doctors or dentist appointments? Me. My middle boy has been diagnosed with Developmental Delay so it’s me taking him to appointments for that. I also had to take him on public transport an hour away when he was a baby up till now as he was born with one functioning kidney… that was all me I had to do that he refused. Shopping trips I need to take the boys. Family events I need to take the boys. He doesn’t come along for ANYTHING. I try and take the boys out and do fun things like on a Saturday but it’s hard and I’m so exhausted but I do it y’know? Housework is all on me too. I work within school hours as I work in the school kitchen so he has the 1 year old whilst I’m at work but he naps usually so it’s
Not like he’s doing a lot then. And will not even do a single dish in the sink. He also refused to call the nursery when my middle son was unwell to let them know he wasn’t going to be going in…. So I had to call on the walk up to my eldest school.

I am just feeling really frustrated and lonely. I get asked when I’m in public “awk you a single mum” “you’ve got your hands full” and honestly it feels like it…

I have tried to tell him before how I feel but he just blames his mental health and makes me feel bad for being a bit upset about it all.

I have been falling asleep on the couch on purpose cos I just need a break when the boys go to bed and if I go upstairs I just feel I can’t relax. I’m so on edge it’s wild. Anything and everything that goes wrong is my fault too. Our tumble dryer broke and that was my fault as I put something infront of it and it overheated. The washing machine is on its last legs (I’ve had it for 6 years) and that’s my fault too. In the mornings I wake up with the boys get them ready and sorted and sort the youngest out too and wake him up at 8:30am before I’m about to leave to take the boys to school/nursery and genuinely he acts like a teenager when I wake him up. He is Constantly playing this daft game on his pc/phone. He’s 28 years old. We have been out together once this year to the cinema and he didn’t even want to go and wanted to leave it. Which I mean hurt Ngl but I know that was due to his MH but he went and like I tried to make the most of our time together.

I don’t really know the point of this vent is but I just am really at my breaking point. And feel so alone.

in our community

How you manage with 2 ?

Girls How do you do to manage with 2
My big one is 4 years old and he is so demanding … and my second is 2 months old.
I feel if i take care of one of them the other one is crying or waiting to be changed of pop or the other one is not taking the shower 2 days or not brushing the theets uffff
My big one feels alone i see it and now he is all the time with the dog.
I don’t manage to share time with him when my husband is at work and then he act very bad few times a day and that makes me so mad also he want my attention by doing bad things
I feel very bad mum what I try to do is mornings before my husband leave to the job. I get shower get cream on my face. Have a breakfast have my coffee and do whatever I need to do at home like organizing or cleaning something if I have to cook, I also try to cook in the morning. I think this is something good but after the baby requires me a lot of times in the day and when I am busy, the big one wants to be on top of me all the time and I need to be with a baby and I need to sleep the baby and the big one makes a lot of noise and wake up the babyand like this sometimes it happens 34 times after a while the baby cannot sleep anymore without me and I have to take him with me and again I cannot be with the big one end by the time that the baby sleeps it’s already a nap time for the big one and at night at the bed I think about the day and barrelly I pay attention to him or play with him I just remember me saying no, no , he quiet stay there , don’t shout don’t do noise , I can not I don’t have time … all day 🥹
And he Mamá we play this, look at this , read me a book , but when I can do the things he don’t want and I cant correct him sometimes because the little one is on my chest and get scary fuck! 🥹🤐

My husband shaved his head and i give birth next week.

He used beard trimmers and shaved his head… i can’t get over it. I’m 36 weeks pregnant and set to deliver next week because i have hypertension. He didn’t even tell me he thought it’d be a good surprise. I told him last week don’t do it just wait until the holidays are over. I’m having such a hard time cuz i don’t even recognize him anymore. it’s a shock everytime i see him. I don’t like it. It’s also causing conflict between us maybe because i resent him for doing this while im already stressed out with moving, unpacking and then finding out im getting induced next week. I’m so sad and miss him but my brain can’t get passed it…. how would you feel…?

Do I report to the police?

Guys need advice - My neighbours making life incredibly difficult lately. He keeps climbing his ladder to look over into my garden — it makes me feel so watched and uncomfortable, especially with my two little ones playing out there. He keeps going on the ladder to question my builders while they're working. He climbs then bangs on my windows with a broom …
Today he banged so hard my kids started screaming !! , I went out and he was moaning about noise when it was just my washing machine finishing its cycle this was at 2pm!He also keeps calling the council to report me about my extension, so I think he climbs over to actually take pictures as well . There’s a
bit of mess rn while we're having work done — things that are literally none of his business.

But I feel like since i went over to try to talk to him at his door things have gotten worse ! he didn’t even open the door so I just wrote him a letter as I just want peace .
I explained to him I don’t like him climbing over and still he climbed over!
He also came on to my property and painted my fence at the front of my door without my permission still I said nothing as his a older man . But I honestly feel like theirs more to this now his Greek Cypriot and my partners Turkish Cypriots and the Greeks hate the Turkish Cypriots so I feel like his actually racist and just trying to bully us. Do I call the police?
I’ve already emailed the council but I’m not sure what they can even do as his bought his house. But why does that mean it’s okay for him to paint my property fence ? Or constantly climb the fence. He also went to his back garden to sharpen some tools after the argument and also told my partner to come closer to the fence 😭when he had a broom in his hand .

Potty training and getting out of pram

Wanna start potty training my 26 month old but really don’t know where to start I tried her a few months back and she was nowhere near ready I’d ask her if she needed potty she would tell me yes so I’d put her on and she wouldn’t go she would wait till she come off then wee and poo all over the floor but she is now telling me when she has done a poo but not that she needs it or telling me anything about wanting or needing a wee she kinda shows when having a poo but I try strip her off to put her on the potty and I’m always too slow I’ve got another little one due end of may aswell and I was hoping to get her potty trained and out the pram before new baby is here or am I just wishful thinking and she only started walking a month before her second birthday in the start of September

Have any of you tried gentle parenting with your youngest child now that you're older and was a little strict with your now adult child?

My son told my husband and me that we're way more gentle with our daughter than we were with him at her age. She's definitely the little princess around here, and her big brother treats her like one too! 😂 I guess our talks with him were more stern. However, he's grown up to be such a wonderful young man.

Christmas traditions

🎄✨ I’d love some inspiration!

I have a two-month-old baby and I’m really keen to start some lovely Christmas traditions that we can enjoy as a family and carry on as they grow up. ❤️

I’d love to hear what Christmas traditions you have with your little ones or what you did when they were babies.

It could be anything, big or small – special Christmas Eve traditions, festive outings, baking, matching pyjamas, Christmas books, decorations, little keepsakes or anything else that makes Christmas feel magical.

I’d love to start some special traditions of our own, so please share your ideas! 🎅🏼🎁❤️