Episiotomy & Sex

I had my son 4 months ago and had forceps & episiotomy. Sex is still painful 4 months on, I only feel less discomfort in one position but literally any other and it genuinely hurts quite a lot. We are using a lot of lube and taking it slow but it doesn’t feel like it’s getting any less painful..
Is anyone else in the same situation? Feel so deflated by it, me and my partner have always had a good regular sex life so now only doing it with one position and every few weeks because of the pain is getting me down.

Any advice or tips etc appreciated 🙏🏼

Read more on Peanut

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.

Learn more about our guidelines.

Add a comment

Hiya,
I had the same issue with my first son and he’s 2.5 years now.
I would say it took me at least up to a year to feel completely comfortable and pain free.
Your episiotomy scar is just still fresh and doesn’t have much elasticity, I found regular massages to it with lots lube helped! But most of all, don’t give up on the sex. Just keep to whatever you’re comfortable with doing and eventually it should get better. 😊

If you’re already having sex at 4 months post birth… kudos to you! I was 7-8 months at least and even now with an episiotomy scar.. it’s uncomfortable and my son is now 16months old. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself! Take things slowly and lots of foreplay. Warm yourself up :)

Go and see a gynaecologist. Get some specialist advice. It's probably normal but best to get properly assessed

in our community

Help

My LO every feed. Drs don’t seem to think it’s a problem the whole Muslim cloth gets soaked so much I’m using towels now. I’ve tried size O teats he gets really frustrated and still spills it out :(

8 week immunisations

My 8 week old has his first set of injections tomorrow and I’m abit nervous. Does anyone have any advice for after the jabs? I know they get a temp after so have got some calpol to give just before hand. Should I put him to bed in less clothing to make sure he doesn’t get too hot? Any tips from your experience with first set of immunisations? Am I worrying more than I need to? 😅

11 month old constantly standing in cot

Please tell me someone has some advice for this cause wow it’s trying. My almost 11 month old is fully on the move now and his new favourite thing is repeatedly pulling to stand in his cot. The problem is that he wears a sleep sack (mainly so his legs don’t get stuck between the bars tbh lol) so he’s not stable enough to lower himself down. So earlier he fell backwards and hit is head and now we feel like we can’t just leave him to it. Typically it’s his first full day at nursery tomorrow and my first day back at work IT’S LIKE HE KNOWS!!
Please tell me someone has some tips. Currently we are quietly placing him back on his back every time but he just keeps doing it! 🤣🤡

My seven year old

Is out of control. Her dad and I share 50/50 and when she comes to my house she is so mean. And idk what to do

Took 9 week old to a family party where there was loud music and she was next to the speaker for most of the time (about 3 hours). She slept through most of it. Do you think she has hearing loss from this?

Freaking out right now :(

Bedtime

What time are you getting your LOs down for the night now and how are you finding bedtime? We’ve had the sane routine since my daughter was a few weeks old - bath with her older sister and 6.45, followed by a bottle and ideally in bed by 7.30. This worked at first but over the last few weeks she’s been fighting it a lot and, with the exception of a few days last week which were a lot easier, it’s a bit of a battle to get her down and features a lot of screaming and resettling. Not sure if we are putting her down too early or late? Her last nap is usually a cat nap (30-45 mins) and finishes by 6. She’s pretty good at settling herself from a night feed, but seems to be unable to do it at bedtime, even with her dummy.