Selfish and stuck up?!

Hey guys am I the asshole for not wanting to let my 4 year old baby girl go to Europe with my brother and his wife for 2 weeks?
Me and my brothers already have a tough relationship due to childhood trauma but I have never held my daughter back from a relationship with them. They either visit us when they can or we go meet up with them for brunch. Today they dropped me a huge bomb that they want to take her to Europe for vacation but only her because that’s all they can afford. Of course I said hell no because i mean I don’t want her to be away from me for that long and as soon as they heard a no I got told the meanest names and that im pure selfish. They have every chance to come 30 mins down here but they choose not to.. im 20 and they think they can still walk all over me but I stood my ground and simply said no. ( my vacations are also the same week they are going out of town which wasn’t planned it just happened to be the same days) They said they are going to take her and to not make such a big deal out of it. I am going crazy because I really do feel like maybe she would enjoy it but I can’t simply can’t go 2 weeks without her. Please any opinions on this situation?

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We are in Dallas Texas. They want to take her to Europe France I think it’s called

Girl HELL NO! That’s YOUR CHILD! You are responsible for said child. Maybe if she was 10 or 11 years old but 4? They can’t tell you what THEY are going to do with YOUR child. That’s insane. Tell them to go have a baby and see if that would feel as a MOTHER, NO IS NO. They don’t tell you what to do, please don’t be a people pleaser when it comes to your kid! If anything happens, that pain is unforgivable! If they treat you like that.. how you think they gonna treat your child? Idc. Nobody who doesn’t respect ME AS THE MOTHER does not have access to my BABY. And Wym only her? No no and noooo! That’s a little girl, I don’t know the dynamics of your situation but my LITTLE GIRL ALONE ? Nah. She needs to be able to tell you EVERYTHING that’s happening without coercion

Besides the trauma I think it’s a little normal if you guys are wealthier because I know a handful of wealthy people and it’s normal to travel to nice places like that at that age otherwise if you’re whatever the hell class I belong in it’s different and I feel like there isn’t much to do at that age and or remember so why not wait until they are like 9 or 10. Also your feelings are valid so regardless of any and everything you are allowed to say no and not feel guilty. I agree they can’t tell you what they are going to do with your child unless they happen to have custody of said child because then technically they could. Could you afford to go with since it’s your vacation days too? No judgement cause I can barely afford to stay where I am in general, why didn’t they invite you and your daughter?

im pretty sure they didn’t invite me because I am broke as hell lol I got my bills paid and my house paid but that’s all I can afford me and my husband pay everything we have for us so we are like between the bottom class and broke I guess.. we have full custody of our daughter they just want to take her just because they want to.

She wouldn’t be going

Hell no, not when they’re so young and you can’t go along

Keep your baby home with you and do not feel bad about it.

in our community

I've finally done it

I have finally done it. I have finally become the trope, the stereotype.

I have become bitter, resentful, and very overwhelmed and overloaded. I am very unhappy and hit burnout. And I snapped at my husband last night. I work full-time, and work has been very busy so im working late a lot. Im also in grad school. I also have a toddler that has become VERY clingy with me. My husband works shorter days but commutes, so he usually gets home after me by an hour or more. When he gets home, he usually heads to the restroom for at least 30 mins when he gets home. And now my toddler doesnt want anything to do with him. So im doing all the toddler duties until bed. I dont get 5 mins to myself. Not for almost 2 years. I finally hit my wall. I have also, somehow, become my MILs medical ride service and she somehow has an appt every week, it seems?! Shes not sick!! My husband was complaining that he needs to change routine to fit in a workout sometimes, and I lost it. I have been BEGGING for 5 mins to myself for months. I have been telling him how im not good, im going to burn out for months. And between his attitude and him complaining (which really got me b/c he blames me for not being able to work out?! Saying I need help when he gets home so he just cant workout now) I just lost it completely. I told him how unfair my life has become and I have the entire mental and emotional load and it is just not fair. He got mad at me and said "hes trying" when hes literally not trying at all. What do I do?? No one is taking the load from me! And im done and dont know what to do now.
I do not like this version of me.

Is this clever or cruel?

My husband and i were talking and with social media and the internet in general being a terrifying dumpster fire, we are trying to figure out the best way to keep our son safe while still teaching him how to safely be online and moderation.

We landed on the idea of giving him the 90's kid treatment. A computer in the living room for us to keep an eye on what hes doing online, and once we feel hes mature enough to hang with friends without adult supervision he gets a flip phone. When we feel he is responsible enough and he earns and saves up the money for the physical phone, case, and screen cover, then we will be happy to take him to get a smart phone.

I thought this was air tight, but now my brother says its cruel to give a kid a flip phone, and besides he can just use his friends phones at school.

My husband and i remember a time before the internet, and we remember having complete access to something no one understood yet. We saw unspeakable things and are always battling with the urge to put the phone and social media down. I dont want that for my son, especially with his brain so vulnerable still.

If your partners parent passes away

And you and that parent didn't get along are you still go to the funeral?

Not my situation!

AITA?

This isn't a major issue, just wondering if I'm being a bit of an asshole.

• I do shift work, 5 out of 7 days, full-time.
• My partner works from home (mostly, sometimes he goes into the office) M-F, full-time.

Anyway, whenever I have a day off during the week he gets in his feelings when I make myself food (breakfast and lunch) but not him. His reason is he's working, I'm not - Which is fair but I've asked him how many times on a weekend has he gotten up, on his day off and made me breakfast and a lunch to take with me to work? You guessed it, 0.

So basically, just because I'm at home I don't think the responsibility to feed him should automatically fall on me when he manages to feed himself just fine while I'm at work.

Partner no longer wants baby #2

Before our son was born we originally both wanted minimum 2 kids but we were hoping for 3-4. My partner found the birth traumatic to watch and also struggled a lot with the newborn/baby stage. He no longer wants to have any more children and it’s completely breaking my heart. I need another baby. We’ve spoken about it a lot and the options. He said he wasn’t COMPLETELY closed off to it so I asked him to try and work through his feelings and reconsider his decision. He eventually said he definitely doesn’t want another. I know that I will always want one and my feelings will never change. Do we have to break up or does anyone know anything else I can do to help change his mind? Has anyone else’s partner said this and then changed their mind? I don’t want to break up because I adore him and our life together and I’d hate to split up our family for “selfish” reasons and make my son miss out on having both of us together but I just don’t know what to do

Nursery funding

My child turned 9 months last week. I applied for government funded hours nearly 2 months ago and so well within the required timeframe for the April term, however upon receiving my first invoice without the funding applied and having questioned this, I have now been informed that the stretched funding doesn’t start until 4th May.

Has anyone else been told it won’t start until May?

The government site states it should start from April 1st, and so I intentionally set my nursery start and return to work as the start of April for that reason, knowing that I wouldn’t be able to afford the nursery on my sole income without the funding