How do you get anything done?

Honestly I am baffled that people manage to get anything done. Especially those of you with more than one kid. I can’t even prep dinner because my 11 week old suddenly doesn’t want to be in her carrier with me and just squirms the entire time or cries. Then if I put her down to do anything I risk her getting overtired and decide I need to tend to putting her to sleep instead and then my whole day just seems to spiral. When she does nap during the day either I or my husband have to keep her on us so she doesn’t wake up. I’m confused on how people are getting ready for the day, doing chores, cooking, living their lives?? What am I doing wrong!?

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There are days i literally sit on my couch all day just nursing and doing contact naps because my son won’t sleep during the day unless on top of me !! Nothing you’re doing wrong mama!

I have no advice, but I am here to say same. I can’t get anything done because she won’t nap unless I’m holding her or she’s next to me. If she’s awake and I put her down, she cries. Very occasionally I can put her down once she’s already sleeping, but it’s only long enough to do some of the dishes or go to the bathroom and make a snack. Never enough time to do really anything.

My baby absolutely HATED being in a baby carrier and I bought two ☹️ I would put my baby in a “swing” (It wasn’t a swing. It just swayed back in fourth in a C shape) and he was fine in there for a bit. I also only do oven meals and my baby is exactly a year older than yours. Potatoes, salmon, shrimp, even eggs and bacon go in the oven so I can wipe the counters and get a pump shesh in the meantime.

Nothing. Your doing what you need to be doing. My days get away from me as well. I still have clothes in the washer and things to be folded and my floors need to be vacuumed, I barely get dinner done. I'm lucky if I eat 2 times a day cause I'm just busy with keeping her entertained and feed. Your doing great, house chores will come and go.

My baby is about the same age and things are extremely chaotic. I hate being stuck inside all day and we try to go out to mom groups. It’s crazy trying to get out the door but I feel better after. I found a free stroller walk in my area which I really like

I have 3 under 3 their is days I feel like pulling my hairs out and that’s with my mother in law with me tbh

The thing that saved my soul- fisher price play mat and then bouncer for 4+ months. I still have to contact nap (🥴) but wake windows- I get shit done!

I don't have any advice but I just want to sympathize. My son only wants me and there have been so many days since his been born that I just rot away on the couch with him. My mental health is not doing well. I have a 2 year old daughter too and I had to put her in daycare. My husband is so amazing but he's a business owner and gone 90% of the time. I'm here for you!!

I am not sure what advice to give really.. I have a 2mo old... 9,12.13 I work a full time 40+hr job that is remote but is demanding I still cook, clean, do laundry etc.. Is it always easy nope do I ask for help at times absolutely.. I think that's my advice.. If you feel overwhelmed ask for help. My husband will help me when I need it and sometimes I don't ask he steps in and if you need to reach out to family or friends do.. Don't wear yourself thin. At first I would then I just caved and realized it's OK to need and ask for help sometimes we are one person. I also do not carry my baby all the time we do have our bonding time but he does have tummy time and he has his swing/glider time.. He has a seat he loves, his naps.. But of course feeding we do and I do spend time with him but he has learned to self soothe and is OK not being held all the time.. That helps.. I can do things still with him there but not carrying him around if that makes sense.

I feel this on a personal level. And I only have one child. But I have three dogs to take care of also. And the laundry hasn't been out away in a week, so if I can get him to fall asleep again, then I will probably be able to put away all that laundry. And also move the dirty into the washer

2 under 3 here 🙋🏼‍♀️ once you’ve conquered naps and gotten on a good sleep schedule everything else just falls into place. That’s where I would put your focus. Until then, god speed lol and like others have said, ask for help if you need it. My husband says I make it look easy so he assumes I don’t need help, I have to ask for it when I do.

I just wanted to say same I wish I could put my 2 year daughter in daycare to but we can't afford it my husband also is gone all the time he's a business Owner Works full time and I work a demanding part time job

@Marissa ugh I'm so sorry! The only reason we put her in daycare is because I'm a teacher and she'd have to go back to daycare soon anyway. Daycare costs are outrageous. 😣

It's crazy how expensive it is my whole paycheck would only cover half a month

I’m going back to work in 3 weeks and this is giving me all the anxiety. I see so many IG moms working out, cooking and doing all the things and I have laundry sitting in the middle of the living room for 5? 6? Idk days that that I haven’t been able to put away.

Just got my laundry pile sorted and put away!!; had changed his bottom, so he was nearby in the room and I would make faces at him in between moving clean laundry 😁😉🤣🤣🤣. Now he's feeding again 😊 ( and seems to be falling asleep, awww).

when baby is napping try laying them on their stomach when putting them down. my daughter loves sleeping on her stomach and if she tries to wake up i put her paci in. my daughter is very alert and loves to look at her surroundings so i’ll have her on my hip or in the carrier. she’s usually a little fussy in the carrier so i’ll just let her get the paci and bounce her around while still doing chores

I also have an 18 month old and same, some days are easier than others, but I’m always running around and just started working again.🥱

I honestly feel the same way, but I’ve been told it gets better as they get older

Same here, it feels like all I’m doing is just feeding her. My days are so chaotic sometimes I don’t even find the time to bathe her. Dreading the day my husband goes back to work.

Only advice I got is get a freezer, get a full day of help (someone takes over whatever kids) and prep crockpot meals. Add 2hours to whatever cook time when frozen and just leave it for the day. Get a pitcher if your breastfeeding, Baby Breeza if your not. Frozen pancakes are awesome and so are frozen sandwiches. Just take them out an hour before feed. You got this mama. All you gotta do is make sure their fed and have diapers for them to run in. Chores and errands will get done eventually don’t stress to much your doing all so great

I feel the exact same! I’m a ftm and my son is 14weeks now. We just got onto somewhat of a schedule, and it makes things a lot easier. I break my chores up into daily tasks. Like Monday is vaccum, Tuesday is mop, etc. Each nap I try to do a chore. And I always like to keep him busy on the play mat for about 30 mins In the morning and then put him in the swing. I try the eat-play-sleep schedule. I also have a bouncer that I bring around the house with me. Like if I’m doing dishes, he sits in the bouncer on the table. If I’m folding laundry or making the bed i lay him on the bed. Just bringing him everywhere with me helps a lot! Hope this helps mama it’s so hard!!

Sleep sleep sleep! Prioritize sleep, and it's a LOT easier to do anything. I cosleep, so i get pretty good sleep in at night from about 7pm to 12pm even if i have to wake up every 2 hours to feed. If i dont get sleep i just want to be a zombie. But the second i have enough sleep i get motivation to do as much as i can and i enjoy it! I dont feel as stressed with baby interruptions, i feel good to read to baby and develop his brain more. Baby is happier bc im more alert to his needs so he has happier wake windows where i can put him down for a sec or hand him off to go do something. Sleep is 100% make or break.

Have you thought about maybe changing dinner time ? Does she particularly get fussy at a certain time ? As far as being attached while asleep have you thought of a weight sac ?

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I've finally done it

I have finally done it. I have finally become the trope, the stereotype.

I have become bitter, resentful, and very overwhelmed and overloaded. I am very unhappy and hit burnout. And I snapped at my husband last night. I work full-time, and work has been very busy so im working late a lot. Im also in grad school. I also have a toddler that has become VERY clingy with me. My husband works shorter days but commutes, so he usually gets home after me by an hour or more. When he gets home, he usually heads to the restroom for at least 30 mins when he gets home. And now my toddler doesnt want anything to do with him. So im doing all the toddler duties until bed. I dont get 5 mins to myself. Not for almost 2 years. I finally hit my wall. I have also, somehow, become my MILs medical ride service and she somehow has an appt every week, it seems?! Shes not sick!! My husband was complaining that he needs to change routine to fit in a workout sometimes, and I lost it. I have been BEGGING for 5 mins to myself for months. I have been telling him how im not good, im going to burn out for months. And between his attitude and him complaining (which really got me b/c he blames me for not being able to work out?! Saying I need help when he gets home so he just cant workout now) I just lost it completely. I told him how unfair my life has become and I have the entire mental and emotional load and it is just not fair. He got mad at me and said "hes trying" when hes literally not trying at all. What do I do?? No one is taking the load from me! And im done and dont know what to do now.
I do not like this version of me.

Is this clever or cruel?

My husband and i were talking and with social media and the internet in general being a terrifying dumpster fire, we are trying to figure out the best way to keep our son safe while still teaching him how to safely be online and moderation.

We landed on the idea of giving him the 90's kid treatment. A computer in the living room for us to keep an eye on what hes doing online, and once we feel hes mature enough to hang with friends without adult supervision he gets a flip phone. When we feel he is responsible enough and he earns and saves up the money for the physical phone, case, and screen cover, then we will be happy to take him to get a smart phone.

I thought this was air tight, but now my brother says its cruel to give a kid a flip phone, and besides he can just use his friends phones at school.

My husband and i remember a time before the internet, and we remember having complete access to something no one understood yet. We saw unspeakable things and are always battling with the urge to put the phone and social media down. I dont want that for my son, especially with his brain so vulnerable still.

If your partners parent passes away

And you and that parent didn't get along are you still go to the funeral?

Not my situation!

Partner no longer wants baby #2

Before our son was born we originally both wanted minimum 2 kids but we were hoping for 3-4. My partner found the birth traumatic to watch and also struggled a lot with the newborn/baby stage. He no longer wants to have any more children and it’s completely breaking my heart. I need another baby. We’ve spoken about it a lot and the options. He said he wasn’t COMPLETELY closed off to it so I asked him to try and work through his feelings and reconsider his decision. He eventually said he definitely doesn’t want another. I know that I will always want one and my feelings will never change. Do we have to break up or does anyone know anything else I can do to help change his mind? Has anyone else’s partner said this and then changed their mind? I don’t want to break up because I adore him and our life together and I’d hate to split up our family for “selfish” reasons and make my son miss out on having both of us together but I just don’t know what to do

Nursery funding

My child turned 9 months last week. I applied for government funded hours nearly 2 months ago and so well within the required timeframe for the April term, however upon receiving my first invoice without the funding applied and having questioned this, I have now been informed that the stretched funding doesn’t start until 4th May.

Has anyone else been told it won’t start until May?

The government site states it should start from April 1st, and so I intentionally set my nursery start and return to work as the start of April for that reason, knowing that I wouldn’t be able to afford the nursery on my sole income without the funding

Jealous of my husband

I’m so jealous of him and it’s making me resentful. We have a ten week old and I’m jealous that he is at work all day. I’m jealous he can leave for lunch and actually eat an uninterrupted lunch. Take a phone call uninterrupted. Chat with a friend he runs in to uninterrupted. Even go to the bathroom when he wants uninterrupted. He comes home from work when he wants. He’s not on a set schedule. Some days are late some are early. It depends on when he’s done. I’m jealous he can come home at 10pm and shower, eat and go right to bed uninterrupted because I already have the baby asleep. He doesn’t have to worry about anything house wise or baby wise because I’ve done it all. Meanwhile I’m covered in puke and crap and smell like rotten milk. When he is home he is VERY active and helpful. So it’s not that. I’m just jealous his world hasn’t changed and mine has I guess. This isn’t something he’s doing wrong so I’m not sure how to get past this. I wish I could keep him home all day because that’s how helpful he is, but I understand he obv needs to work.