Rant: Mom Guilt!

I am just ranting because I have mad mom guilt. We are going on a long overseas trip in the next few weeks, and my LO is a runner. I am traveling by myself, so I purchased a kid leash, some extra harneses to make sure she is safe as I will have luggage and a bunch of stuff. Today, we took the train down to my brother's to practice. My LO likes trains and was excited to ride. It was hard, but we got on the train. It was all chill until we arrived at our destination. I put the kid leash on her, and she ran. I did not, and she fell so hard on her head that the poor thing puked. We iced her head and are monitoring. Luckily, my brother picked us up. The plan was to go to a really cool local park. We went, and she was fine, I was so terrified of what had happened. I kept her up all afternoon so i can monitor her action. She seemed fine most of the day. On the way home, my brother gave us a ride back. The ride back was horrible. Ways took us everywhere, and we still managed to stay parked in traffic. Long story short. I got really car sick, but she puked again. After puking she was fine again. When we got home, she demanded dinner. Then she ran around like normal. Grabbed her blank as she was obviously exhausted. I put her down, and she is sleeping, but Iam still worried for her. I hope my baby is ok. She is such a smart and vibrant soul. I would hate for that to be snuffed out. Anyway... I have horrible mom guilt and am so worried about our upcoming trip as I will have no help. On top of everything, my husband hates the kid leash. He thinks it's inhumane and just reamed into me because this happened to our baby. I understand I would have probably reacted the same way. It's our daughter, of course. we want to keep her safe, so I don't blame him for his reaction. But I only got the leash for her protection. Any suggestions on safety while traveling are much appreciated. I just worry that something bad will happen without the leash and the harneses on our long trip alone. But something bad happened with the leash....so yeah... She is so fast and friendly. That I worry for this trip. Please pray or meditate for us.😬

Read more on Peanut

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.

Learn more about our guidelines.
Add a comment
Avatar

I don't think a leash is bad I'm a single mom of a kid who as soon as his feet hit for the floor he takes off running. I use a leash especially when we go on trips we was at the airport and he's very active. Have you tried the one that goes around urs and her wrist that way she's closer to you. I like that one alot better cause of instead of falling forward she will bounce backwards

Avatar

I never used my harness. But mines leash is on the back

Avatar

Thanks, ladies! I definitely have both leashes. She hates the backpack and keeps trying to take it off, even though it's really cute, and she likes the idea of putting her toys in it, yet refuses to wear it properly. So I opted for the hand one, she was fine with it and it was so helpful at first, but then she ate it lol and now I am terified it will happen again, but even more terrified she will get seriously hurt. We are also really working on listening skills and discipline techniques...but regardless she is a wild full of energy toddlers, which we love, encourage, and celebrate, but safety first.

Read more on Peanut

Trending

in our community

Health Visitors!

Need a good rant SORRY but does anyone else feel like HV's seek joy by trying to make you feel like a bad parent or is it just me!? 🫠

I took my son to the HV drop in clinic to query something about his skin, they weighed him whilst he was there, plotted it on a graph and said that he hasn't put on enough weight and that they want to refer me to a feeding specialist, essentially, what I am doing is not good enough and he's withering away

This is my second breast fed child, and the HV's should know more than anyone that ALL children develop differently!?

He turned 3 months old last week, he is quite clearly happy and healthy and fed on demand whenever the heck he wants some din din

I ALWAYS come away from HV's pissed off for whatever reason

Avatar

2

13

Time-out method at nursery

I just found out that they put our son on time out in the corner of the room for 2 minutes for pushing another child. He had been pushing a lot that day apparently but they didn’t tell us on pick up. We found out coincidentally because his key person was at the drop off this morning. I’m fuming! What would you do? Am I overreacting?

Avatar

31

Appropriate age to go out

I am the kind of person who struggles with being at home all day, not good for my mental health. I have a 1 month old and I am trying to start doing things with her. Like going ti the park, running errands. But people seem surprised and kind of judgy that I am out with the baby at her age. Is this wrong?

Avatar

14

Can anyone offer me reassurance?😪

It's currently 4:35am where we live, I've been up since 2am with my toddler (2years9months) who has vomited 5 times.
I'm not sure what it could be, whether food poisoning or a stomach bug, but he's exhausted and has finally fallen asleep.

I'm just really shaken up and don't think I'll sleep tonight. I'm 37 weeks pregnant, sitting on my birth ball next to his bed just watching him and listening for signs he may be sick.


He woke me up over his baby monitor at 2am, I just heard him coughing and spluttering and thrashing around in his bed, it gave me such a massive fright. I don't mind vomit so much, like physically I'm not someone who's bothered by vomiting and ill happily catch it in my hands, but him being unwell just gives me SO much anxiety, and I'm already a hormonal mess atm.


It's so typical that it happens tonight as my husband has a really important day at work tomorrow. Usually he works from home but he has an important meeting in the office tomorrow that he can't miss. He's been up helping me since 2am but I've told him to go back to sleep now. Now I'm just sitting here full of anxiety. Can anyone reassure me, give advice etc?

He started being sick at 2am, again at around 2.30, 3, 3.30, 4.15. He's just completely conked out asleep he's exhausted. He's refusing water, he took one little sip after the 2nd bout of sickness and just threw up again. I have it here just in case of course. I've had to change the bedding, his clothes twice, my clothes, we have several towels dirty too. I'm so overwhelmed and anxious 😪


And he's been sick before obviously but just never so much in such a short space of time.

Avatar

11

First Mother’s Day

I feel like such a bad person for this & I’m not looking for sympathy or anything but yesterday was going so well and than I got really emotional and upset because my partner done everything special he could have done but he didn’t even put a few lines in a card from my baby for my first Mother’s Day card..
He said that because there was lots of writing in the card he didn’t realise that it would have hurt or upset me so bad but it did.. I let it affect me alot more than I feel like it should have but I LOVE sentimental things I love little things like that, meaningful stuff. Especially being my first Mother’s Day that I’ve dreamt of all my life..
There is a big age gap between me and my partner and also he’s Italian so maybe he didn’t realise but I just feel so goddam shit about it. Like I ruined MY day..
I spent the day all on my own with my baby at my mums house instead of with my partner bc of me reacting the way I did and I just felt like I toke it so wrong..
I feel I can’t forgive myself for this and I am the type of person to keep thinking about the situation even if my partner says everything’s okay. I beat myself up about it so badly and in such a low mood for it. Even today and yesterday has passedšŸ˜ž
Maybe this may help getting it off my chest and writing it down but how can I seriously live with myself from this? What can I do better?
I’m such an awful person I know😫😫

Avatar

9

ā€œBad mumā€

I had a Mother’s Day afternoon tea yesterday for myself, my mum and my MIL. MIL arrived and didn’t say anything to me, just walked in and sat down. My mum was fussing over my LG as she usually does whilst I was in and out sorting food, making a bottle, feeding the cat, but she was getting wriggly so I took her and put her on her play mat and when I walked away to get her some toys to play with she whinged a bit so I said ā€œI’m not leaving you, I’m coming backā€ to which my MIL replied ā€œshe is leaving you, she’s a bad mumā€. It was probably meant as a joke (maybe) but I’d never say anything like that, even as a joke. Probably being a bit over sensitive but I’m tired and constantly doubting if I even know what I’m doing. It’s bad enough thinking I’m a bad mum every day without somebody literally saying it. I spoke to my partner about it, both at the time and afterwards, and he’s said she was out of order… but not out of order to say anything to her but even if he did, she’d just deny it or say it was a joke. The worst part is she actually has no interest in my LG, she only wants to see her if her friends are round at her house and then she wants me to take baby round for her to show her off, who to me are just strangers. To add insult to injury, after she called me a bad mum, she said that her niece had a baby a month before me, and my LG ā€œwill probably catch her up when she’s readyā€ šŸ™„ Again, baring in mind, she’s seen my LG 3 times since she was born and she’s nearly 5 months old but has implied that she’s not developing as quickly as the other baby. I know babies develop at their own rate but my LG is rolling, trying to crawl, can sit up with very little support, can bring a spoon from a bowl to her mouth to feed herself (I’ve not given her any food, but we practiced with a spoon to see if she was showing any readiness to start weaning). I think she’s doing really well so I don’t think she needs to ā€œcatch upā€ šŸ™„
The cherry on top of the day was that we sat down to eat and she felt an appropriate topic to discuss was my partners upcoming colonoscopy and bowel prep šŸ˜‚
I think the outcome and the 2 hours that she was here is that we won’t be seeing her again anytime soon, and I know that wouldn’t bother her in the slightest, which is quite sad when my LG is her first grandchild and she has no interest in her

That’s my little rant over

Avatar

2

3

Read more on Peanut