Daddy phase?

Is anyone else going through this? My twins are 14 months old and when they wake up in the night or get upset when their dad is around, they want absolutely nothing to do with me and will literally crawl away from me crying to get to their dad?
It’s heartbreaking feeling like I can’t do anything to comfort them because they literally don’t want to be near me 😭

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They all go through phases but can honestly say it does change. Mums tend to be more the best for comfort and cuddles and dad's tend to be the fun playful climbing frame😂. When they get to 2 year old honestly you'll be relieved to get the break because once they get that 2 year old energy there is no stopping them 😂

Both twins? I have twins too around that age, but one has attached to me and the other to my husband.

yeah both but one more than the other. They are only like this when he is here as both are completely attached to me when he’s not here. I am a SAHM and he works so they usually are a bit upset when he leaves in the morning but it’s short lived. I feel helpless like I can’t do anything to comfort them when he is around because they want nothing to do with me 😳

I have this too with my 18 month old. I think it’s because he doesn’t see him as much. I’ve put it down to the hope that it’s because his dad works more and I’m the one off with him through the holidays etc.

How much time does he spend/ bond with the twins when he gets home from work or when he’s off? I’m thinking it’s separation anxiety? My twins would cry when he left as well. To remedy this we would all wave goodbye and say “bye bye dada” then when he got home we would wave again and say “dadas home, hi dada” I started this during peak separation anxiety (9 months) and now they’re at the door waving hello and goodbye without crying- it took months for them to develop, so definitely start now. As for comforting I feel you... I would take the twin that’s a little more attached to you and take him to another room where he doesn’t see dad and try to settle. Sometimes a dark room helps - with/without white noise.

in our community

Is this clever or cruel?

My husband and i were talking and with social media and the internet in general being a terrifying dumpster fire, we are trying to figure out the best way to keep our son safe while still teaching him how to safely be online and moderation.

We landed on the idea of giving him the 90's kid treatment. A computer in the living room for us to keep an eye on what hes doing online, and once we feel hes mature enough to hang with friends without adult supervision he gets a flip phone. When we feel he is responsible enough and he earns and saves up the money for the physical phone, case, and screen cover, then we will be happy to take him to get a smart phone.

I thought this was air tight, but now my brother says its cruel to give a kid a flip phone, and besides he can just use his friends phones at school.

My husband and i remember a time before the internet, and we remember having complete access to something no one understood yet. We saw unspeakable things and are always battling with the urge to put the phone and social media down. I dont want that for my son, especially with his brain so vulnerable still.

Partner no longer wants baby #2

Before our son was born we originally both wanted minimum 2 kids but we were hoping for 3-4. My partner found the birth traumatic to watch and also struggled a lot with the newborn/baby stage. He no longer wants to have any more children and it’s completely breaking my heart. I need another baby. We’ve spoken about it a lot and the options. He said he wasn’t COMPLETELY closed off to it so I asked him to try and work through his feelings and reconsider his decision. He eventually said he definitely doesn’t want another. I know that I will always want one and my feelings will never change. Do we have to break up or does anyone know anything else I can do to help change his mind? Has anyone else’s partner said this and then changed their mind? I don’t want to break up because I adore him and our life together and I’d hate to split up our family for “selfish” reasons and make my son miss out on having both of us together but I just don’t know what to do

Nursery funding

My child turned 9 months last week. I applied for government funded hours nearly 2 months ago and so well within the required timeframe for the April term, however upon receiving my first invoice without the funding applied and having questioned this, I have now been informed that the stretched funding doesn’t start until 4th May.

Has anyone else been told it won’t start until May?

The government site states it should start from April 1st, and so I intentionally set my nursery start and return to work as the start of April for that reason, knowing that I wouldn’t be able to afford the nursery on my sole income without the funding

Jealous of my husband

I’m so jealous of him and it’s making me resentful. We have a ten week old and I’m jealous that he is at work all day. I’m jealous he can leave for lunch and actually eat an uninterrupted lunch. Take a phone call uninterrupted. Chat with a friend he runs in to uninterrupted. Even go to the bathroom when he wants uninterrupted. He comes home from work when he wants. He’s not on a set schedule. Some days are late some are early. It depends on when he’s done. I’m jealous he can come home at 10pm and shower, eat and go right to bed uninterrupted because I already have the baby asleep. He doesn’t have to worry about anything house wise or baby wise because I’ve done it all. Meanwhile I’m covered in puke and crap and smell like rotten milk. When he is home he is VERY active and helpful. So it’s not that. I’m just jealous his world hasn’t changed and mine has I guess. This isn’t something he’s doing wrong so I’m not sure how to get past this. I wish I could keep him home all day because that’s how helpful he is, but I understand he obv needs to work.

NHS job

Anyone work for the NHS and does 12 hour shifts? How do you work around childcare and your partners job?

He has no respect for anything to do with me.

Husband and I decided to separate 3 days ago. I've been sleeping on the floor in the kids room, and we both have to stay in the same apartment for a while. He wont stop pushing little things and I am reaching my limit. Photos in comments