Househelp

Does anyone have househelp to help keep on top of the million chores we have to do? How often do they come? What jobs do they do?

I'm a SAHM and I have a wild toddler who has just turned 2. I'm really struggling to manage household tasks. I don't own a dishwasher (our kitchen is quite big but there's nowhere to put it) so dishes are always left over night for the next day.

I'd really like some help or advice please. Our daily routine atm goes as follows.

9.30: Wake up.
10am: Breakfast and play with son a bit
11ish : Tidy up amd Take son to inlaws (I stay with him) on Wednesdays he has swimming at this time.
1pm: make lunch for us both (on Tuesdays we go to stay and play till 3)
2pm: Nap
During Nap time I wash leftover dishes from day before, cook dinner for the evening and put a laundry load on.
4PM - Son wakes up - give him snack. Let him play whilst put dries clothes away and put out washed ones. Sometimes we have family pop around during this time so can't always do house work.
6PM - husband comes home from work and we all have dinner (everything then get left in the kitchen because no time to wash up)
7PM - 9.30PM - We both have classes at home. I used to put my son to sleep at 8.30 but he refuses to sleep now till we are both done and upstairs.
By 10 o'clock I am absolutely shattered and I just need to lie down. I am extremely aneamic atm (taking supplements to help but I feel horrible everyday). I'm somewhat glad he wake up late because getting out of bed in the morning is such a struggle.

I feel like I physically can't do everything. My husband will help with my son when hes home and will tidy up the living room and vaccum it at the end of the day but everything else is left to me. We have weekends off. But as its the only time we have properly together as a family we are either taking my son out somewhere or were having to go to one of the in laws because they've called us over for food.

I feel like I must be doing something wrong because how else is everyone getting things done?!?

Read more on Peanut

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.

Learn more about our guidelines.
Add a comment
Avatar

Yes I have a few different people I have a day nanny (we do joint care) on a Monday she helps with my 2 children whilst I get work done or jobs I don’t have any family nearby all live over 4 hours away!

I have cleaners twice a week Monday just a freshen up day and Thursday clean day and once a month on that Thursday they get an extra 2 hours for a really deep clean skirting boards ironing for me if there’s any I haven’t had chance to on a Monday they sometimes also run errands for me food shop walk the dog etc depends on what I’ve managed to get done and what I haven’t each week varies xx

Avatar

I do it all myself with a little help from the hubby that's it 🤷🏻‍♀️ with 2 children. I'm just in a constant state of cleaning everyday 🤣

Avatar

I don’t cook or leave my house unless the sink is empty. I have a toddler and a ten yr old. I do the laundry put it away, the vacuuming, cook dinner early, take my oldest to school w baby and pick her up. But I imagine it’s harder because of the classes u take in the evenings. Perhaps waking up earlier is the only way to get more done🤷🏻‍♀️

Avatar

You just need an organized plan, and you truly can do it all. I have 4 kids in total and all different ages, but when the two older ones were 2 and 3 and I was a SAHM, life is scheduled & structured, and yes, of course, you will be tired. So, here are my tips, and I hope they can help you as they have our household 1. Consistent bedtime routine. In bed by 7pm. 2. laundry is done 2x/wk - Tuesday and Friday nights, starting at 7pm. So on Tues and Fri, right after nightime routine, i throw in the laundry. I always had an alarm set in case I fell asleep (which always happened and still does) in order to change the loads. 3. Organized food plans and times. Set up a schedule. If you don't, kids will eat around the clock. Breakfast was set at a certain time and evolved as they got older. Mon, Wed & Fri were cereal days, and Tues & Thur were either pancakes, waffles, or French toast (I would make in bulk and freeze and switch up from month to month). Same with lunch and dinner. You got this.

Avatar

It's just me & my husband doing the cleaning. Our 2 year old does "help" sweep, mop, wipe things. She likes to be involved so I try to give her a job like wipe the fridge while I do the dishes. Like said planing the food ahead of time helps a lot. Once a month I make a big batch of muffins for breakfast & lunch. My daughter also likes to sleep in later so for mornings where we want to go to playdates, ECT we will do the muffins, on the days where we are outside most of the morning they work great for picnics. We have a box on wheels & before she goes down for her nap or to bed she will help me put all her toys in it.

Avatar

Here is the cleaning schedule that works for us:
Mon-Tues Daily cleaning only
Daily Cleaning:
put away dry dishes, clean litter box, wash days dishes and put out to dry, wipe down kitchen, sort toys, sweep and mop main areas.
Wed-Daily + Errands/Groc.+ pre-treat laundry
Thursday- Daily+ Kitchen + Wash/Dry laundry
Friday-Daily+Bedrooms+put daughter's laundry away
Saturday-Daily+Living room+put our Laundry Away
Sunday-Daily+Bathroom+Planning for next week

Avatar

Here is how that works into our daily routine:
8am I wake-start Coffee & Breakfast & Daily Cleaning(put up dishes and clean litter box) I do start dinner if it's a crock pot meal
8:30-wake her up, get dressed, breakfast
10-Outing, playdate, errands/Groc.
11-snack
12:30-lunch
1-2 Cleaning(the days room and laundry) & start dinner
2-4-Nap/quiet time
4:00-snack & finish dinner
5:30-8:30 I have night classes. My husband will watch her
6:30-Dinner & evening walk
8:00-bath, brush teeth, I usually do PJ and cuddles before bed if I can. 8:30-her bed time
After she goes to bed we finish our Daily Cleaning and get ready for bed. Usually only takes us a maximum of 30 min to finish cleaning for the day.
This is what has helped our family the best so far but as with any system I'm sure it will change over time. 🫶🏻

Avatar

@Sarah You go, girl! Nice!

Read more on Peanut

Trending

in our community

Is this clever or cruel?

My husband and i were talking and with social media and the internet in general being a terrifying dumpster fire, we are trying to figure out the best way to keep our son safe while still teaching him how to safely be online and moderation.

We landed on the idea of giving him the 90's kid treatment. A computer in the living room for us to keep an eye on what hes doing online, and once we feel hes mature enough to hang with friends without adult supervision he gets a flip phone. When we feel he is responsible enough and he earns and saves up the money for the physical phone, case, and screen cover, then we will be happy to take him to get a smart phone.

I thought this was air tight, but now my brother says its cruel to give a kid a flip phone, and besides he can just use his friends phones at school.

My husband and i remember a time before the internet, and we remember having complete access to something no one understood yet. We saw unspeakable things and are always battling with the urge to put the phone and social media down. I dont want that for my son, especially with his brain so vulnerable still.

Avatar

3

38

If your partners parent passes away

And you and that parent didn't get along are you still go to the funeral?

Not my situation!

Avatar

24

Partner no longer wants baby #2

Before our son was born we originally both wanted minimum 2 kids but we were hoping for 3-4. My partner found the birth traumatic to watch and also struggled a lot with the newborn/baby stage. He no longer wants to have any more children and it’s completely breaking my heart. I need another baby. We’ve spoken about it a lot and the options. He said he wasn’t COMPLETELY closed off to it so I asked him to try and work through his feelings and reconsider his decision. He eventually said he definitely doesn’t want another. I know that I will always want one and my feelings will never change. Do we have to break up or does anyone know anything else I can do to help change his mind? Has anyone else’s partner said this and then changed their mind? I don’t want to break up because I adore him and our life together and I’d hate to split up our family for “selfish” reasons and make my son miss out on having both of us together but I just don’t know what to do

Avatar

1

17

Nursery funding

My child turned 9 months last week. I applied for government funded hours nearly 2 months ago and so well within the required timeframe for the April term, however upon receiving my first invoice without the funding applied and having questioned this, I have now been informed that the stretched funding doesn’t start until 4th May.

Has anyone else been told it won’t start until May?

The government site states it should start from April 1st, and so I intentionally set my nursery start and return to work as the start of April for that reason, knowing that I wouldn’t be able to afford the nursery on my sole income without the funding

Avatar

6

Jealous of my husband

I’m so jealous of him and it’s making me resentful. We have a ten week old and I’m jealous that he is at work all day. I’m jealous he can leave for lunch and actually eat an uninterrupted lunch. Take a phone call uninterrupted. Chat with a friend he runs in to uninterrupted. Even go to the bathroom when he wants uninterrupted. He comes home from work when he wants. He’s not on a set schedule. Some days are late some are early. It depends on when he’s done. I’m jealous he can come home at 10pm and shower, eat and go right to bed uninterrupted because I already have the baby asleep. He doesn’t have to worry about anything house wise or baby wise because I’ve done it all. Meanwhile I’m covered in puke and crap and smell like rotten milk. When he is home he is VERY active and helpful. So it’s not that. I’m just jealous his world hasn’t changed and mine has I guess. This isn’t something he’s doing wrong so I’m not sure how to get past this. I wish I could keep him home all day because that’s how helpful he is, but I understand he obv needs to work.

Avatar

4

7

NHS job

Anyone work for the NHS and does 12 hour shifts? How do you work around childcare and your partners job?

Avatar

6

Read more on Peanut